The Modern Way - Another "Friend" Gone

 Someone I loosely call a friend - you know, connected on Facebook and LinkedIn and so on and I worked quite closely with them around 20 years ago.  Today and not for the first time published a post on Facebook that was offensive and shoutey if there is such a word.  So un-friend and un-follow were required.  You see, it's like the bloke who rather than discuss climate change his first words were yelled into my face "You're a Climate Denier!!" and also decided to yell at me for my Brexit views.

This chap decided to call me (although he doesn't know this) a "racist" for being a member of a certain political party.  So he tarnished everyone of us with a blanket quite outrageous statement and you can't go around doing that and have no consequence for it.  I know, free speech and all that, but to blanket bomb people with this now, often overused and I suppose thereby meaningless statement surely shows the way that we have dumbed down society where yelled and thrown about libels are bandied around as facts or truths.

Anyway, I will never have to see or hear from him again which is good, he's turned into a right disgusting mouthpiece for vitriol and rudeness these past few years and if he thinks and acts like this his mind is already poisoned and yo don't need that in your life.  I've already been giving him 30 days rest at a time but this is enough.

Ah but what about free speech when you block someone I hear some ask?  Well I'm not stopping him from saying and posting what he wants, its up to him.  I am choosing not to read it which is totally up to me, his rights are not affected and my rights are not to hear stuff I don't want to which is fully exercising my rights too of course.

Thank Goodness That's Fixed!

 I'd turned off the mains water and the boiler and controls and our friendly Heating Engineer arrived quite late, it was dark and didn't need to drain down the system such is the configuration and the location of well sited stop cocks etc. It was the most awkward bit of plumbing you can imagine and his colleague also arrived to bring some tool they needed.

Bless him, the job was completed and they both left with the new gleaming copper work in place of the horrible stuff that was here before.  Hurrah.  The usual turning on the heating system and hot water and timers and programmers and we were away.  The taps and shower joyfully spitting away until the air had escaped the pipe work.  Invoice arrived this morning and duly paid straight away - for the sort of service they deliver it is only right that they should get their bill paid immediately.

There's that inevitable dampness around and the airing cupboard feels more like a sauna at the moment as the leaked water drys out from under the floor boards!  Lucky we found the leak I say.

So at least that is one thing off my mind although not entirely as it makes me concerned about the remainder of the pipework in the house and after the electric problem a few weeks back, that too.  

Anyway, we are fixed, we have hot water and heating and that's the thing really.  Good trades people are hard to find. 

A Day Without Water

 Yikes - that's some leak we have and I am just about to cut off the water to the house and hope our man can fix it.  What a pain but at least I found it early and at least it is fixable although it really is in the most difficult and awkward place imaginable. 

So a full drain down of the system is required and that will then allow the leak to be fixed.  It looks like a badly soldered joint to me that has overtime just allowed water to seep through and that's why there was a build up of yukky stuff (a technical term) around the pipe.  I have to say I thought that they had dealt with that when we had all the work done recently and at the beginning of the year.  Obviously not.

Anyway, a day without water beckons....  

It's All In Your Head

 It is, one of the strangest things is surely that your head conjures up all this stuff and makes things that don't exist look almost real.  I need to channel my inner Matrix at times to realise that lots of this stuff just doesn't exist other than as neurons rattling around in your head.  "Is that air you are breathing?" says Morpheus to Neo after he has exerted himself and is recovering from the effort.  

On some days I am aware enough to realise this and on others days, not so much.  It is easy to let ego and the pain body and subconscious run things until you become aware that it is that causing the pain and distraction.  Quite how you master yourself to control it, is something quite different.  With the constant victim-hood of the pain body, the insatiable appetite of the ego and the programmed actions of the subconscious it can be a battle in your head that whatever part controls keeping it all under control feels overwhelmed by and unable to.

At the moment it is keeping it all under control that is testing me.  The time of year is not helpful either.  Christmas was always a happy time but I haven't had a Christmas with my family for 14 years or so.  I have celebrated with my partner's family but it really isn't the same and it affects the way I think and act plus it is a dark time of year.  Not ling now until the shortest day and that trend starts to reverse.  

There is an urge to just walk away and drop all of the commitments that I have the business included for what do I have to prove and what does it matter?  The ego says give it a go and the pragmatist says let it go.  Both are possible.  I have decided to give it a three month go and if it doesn't happen then I can close it down and have done with it.  

Do I really need to do any of these things what is their purpose?  Why would you do it and what's the point? Add to this there is the procrastination, the over thinking and the self imposed stress and anxiety that manifests itself.  The paranoia that this ex business partner is "out to get me" doesn't help and applying a little logic to the situation settles down the internal strife and conflict that only really exists in my head.

So the battles rage in your mind as most of this stuff isn't real "pain" shall we call it?  In fact it is your very own body that conjures this stuff up and sets you down a path of pain, stress and anxiety.  It is what it is and there is the reality of it.  I beat myself up for not realising there was a leaking pipe.  The maintenance man was right there in that very room a few weeks ago and didn't notice it and so why should I?  Why am I worrying about it?  Because my head is telling me that it is my fault.  It isn't of course and so it is with many things that I come across.  

So what to do about it?  It's not some sort of revelation as I know this stuff.  I have to overcome the way my brain works and so actually having moments like this, catching myself in it's brain conflict, it's like an imaginary war inside my skull, it is a power game, brain politics and that's what is so curious about it.  This maelstrom of thoughts and scenario playing doesn't actually achieve anything these days (different when I was working I'd say).  I probably need to just start being more conscious again and make sure that I catch myself descending into the created imaginary situation constructed by my brain.  

How's Your Luck?

 I walked into the Airing Cupboard and there was a slightly musty yet humid smell in the air.  Looking down I found that the floorboards were looking damp and yes, of all things, we have a leak right on the bend of one of the pipes.  I'd say it was a small dry solder joint and it needs fixing (of course).  So my heating man is coming over shortly to assess it as my pictures were not of the greatest quality I have to say.  So that's how my luck is as I am still awaiting the bill for the new motor! 

I guess it is best to find this right now and get it sorted out but what a blooming nuisance!  I think it must have been leaking for sometime too by the looks of it but now it is flowing faster which means it is increasing the pinhole from whence it is emanating.

Typical!  Oh well, it could of course be worse, it could be somewhere where I couldn't see or sense it.

Oh No Super Flu

 So it's going to be named "Super Flu" now is it.  Perhaps my least favourite superhero! 

The NHS want people wearing masks again and yet there is, as I have written before and cited various papers etc no sane reason to do so.  Cloth masks just get damp and surgical masks have way too many gaps in them and cannot halt viruses.  If you wear a mask that stops viruses you need something more than something you can easily breathe in.  

I hope most people see this for what it is?  More state control, more ordering you about, telling you what you can and cannot do.  People who have no meaning to their loves ordering around others so they can feel good in the name of health - yea right!  

It is everywhere now, being told what you can and cannot do and being the sort of person who never took orders without a reason behind them, it really does annoy the hell out of me why anyone gives these people the time of day.  

Remember that masks were not a first line of defence either, they came about through pressure from public sector and civil servants.  There are a series of good books about all of this Dr. Ben Irvine and Laura Dodsworth are a few to open your eyes.  There are more too.  My own research and my own experience rang alarm bells along with the nudge techniques that were used and the heightening of alarm and fear by these leaders.  Disgusting behaviour and watching the crowds turn to sheep was not a great moment either was it?

I hope that at last the people will ignore all of this and do the right thing and take normal precautions.  I've not been anywhere but have a cold picked up somehow, these things are airborne and it's winter and no matter how much I look after myself it's bound to happen, masks or not.

Anyway, let's hope that some common sense is shown but you know, there's newspapers to be sold, headlines don't write themselves and if there isn't anything else to worry us about then this will have to do.

Cognitive Dissonance - Everywhere

 Cognitive dissonance is the mental stress or discomfort felt when holding two conflicting beliefs, values, or attitudes, or when your actions contradict your beliefs, creating an internal inconsistency that people are motivated to reduce. To relieve this unease, individuals often change their beliefs, justify their behaviour, downplay the conflict, or seek new information that supports their actions, even if it's irrational.

You see it everywhere these days along with blind pig ignorance, hypocrisy and outright lies.  The problem is that it is almost accepted behaviour these days.  Given actual facts the person denies those facts exist.  This morning someone was getting up on their high horse about where one of the political parties got some of their funding from and how they felt that was bad.  The interviewer asked them where their funding came from and they weren't sure but stated that it couldn't be as bad as this other parties' donor.  The interviewer then destroyed them with facts about a few of their less savoury donors.  But it mattered not, they charged on ignoring that and went on the attack on the other party.

In my days, if I'd have been challenged like that, I'd ask for the facts and time to look into them and then come back with an apology or a rebuttal for not all facts are equal shall we say.

Politicians, in the face of utter opposition from the electorate and being caught out that certain things were not in their Manifesto push on regardless not noticing the damage they are doing to their party, politics in general and their own reputations in particular.  They do not appear to see their own hypocrisy, dysfunction and lack of common sense when they open their mouths.  

I do wonder how much longer they can keep this up?  Already social media posts and TV clips are being found where these idiots were expressing diametrically opposite views to the ones they now espouse.  I, for one, am pretty fed up with it.  I despise them and will not watch them.  I have no idea how I would react if I met them other than telling them how loathed and despised they really are.

For all of my working life I had a no lie policy as it doesn't pay off at all.  If I was made to by management I would quickly get another job and did so.  The number of people I have seen lie to try and get out of a spot of bother only to be found out and make things substantially worse are too numerous to count.  Some even went behind my back to my customer to fix a problem that existed only to find that I had already spoken to them and agreed a course of action.  Customers may get angry that a problem has happened but if you tackle it head on and have a plan to sort it out generally things will be OK.  

These people do not live by my rules and almost everyone knows that they cannot be trusted to say the truth or they will say one thing and do the other.  They wonder why they have lost the public's respect when the answer is right in front of their faces!  

That's It, Sorted The Main Event - Now For Plan B

 So I finally got the sale to go through using a different browser and that's it now I think.  Everything arriving boxed up and ready to go for the Big Day.  A few presents yet to arrive a couple of cards to turn up today and I think I am there.  Then there's getting all of the cards out and after that I can turn to kick starting the App sales, if possible.  I don't see much movement from all the work I did in October but it was a static sales launch and I had all that madness from the bloke who threw his toys out of the pram and them blamed me for it and has fired a whole broadside of shots my way.

So the decision has to be to try and get this out there and see if it has any traction whatsoever.  That's not easy as you have to reach the right demographic with the right equipment and then they need to download it and like it so hard work.  After all these years though, I think that I should give it the opportunity and give it a shot.  I am going to go for three months to try and resolve it.  If I cannot, then I will shut it down as it isn't worth pursuing something that nobody wants.  I can only do my best and see where it gets to.  At least I  have placed a limit on it and we can live or die by that.  

I think that is only fair and if it fails well I don't spend my life (or the rest of it) pursuing it. 

Diet Notes & Other Strange Things

I have lost around 3 stone this year although I can see that halting and reversing for the next two or three weeks as Christmas hoves into view and the excesses of food and alcohol take their toll.

So back to diet notes.  On Monday and Tuesday morning we have breakfast (cooked English) together but for the remainder of the week I don't eat until I feel hungry so that tends to be anywhere after noon and even as late as 2 pm and have dinner around 7:30 pm missing out breakfast altogether which is part of this 5:2 regimen Lately though I find that I am not hungry at all on Monday and Tuesday mornings and struggle to eat a plateful of food.  I am going to have t cut down on the amount I eat on those days or just not eat at all like I do for the rest of the week.  

I find myself feeling satiated after half of my cooked breakfast which I guess is all part of the 5:2 diet.  When I do eat at other times I do so until I don't feel hungry and generally that is all I do eat.  It is quite strange not really wanting food until much later in the day but I am not feeling any strange affects and the loss of weight is the main benefit.  

I've just ordered a major shop that is all for Christmas and that is due Saturday which will provide the basis for a week or more of excess.  Having done that I went to another site that I use which is specifically nuts, dried fruit etc.  And blow me down, just as I go to checkout the online basket reset itself and all of my basket disappeared.  Really annoying I can tell you.  I had that with a major shop not long ago and it was yell out loud annoying.  I'm guessing it is my PC which is getting old and the cookie's resetting which have done it.  So I'd better get back to see if I can recover the situation.

Right In Your Face - How They Lie And Cheat

 We always knew it.  Politicians cheat and generally most of the stuff you hear on the News is manipulated and twisted to fit a narrative of some sort.  Let's take this morning's fear about Flu shall we.  It happens every year unless it was Covid when Flu never happened. In addition I have a feeling it was around 2018 we did have a lot of deaths from Flu and it pretty much surpassed the Covid deaths of a year or two later.  No one panicked then but, you know, look it up, it was all on reflection unnecessary and caused more harm than the lives it saved.

SO this morning they were concerned that there could be up to 10,000 cases requiring Hospitalization and it was a major concern to the Dr they wheeled out.  There are 145,000 to 165,000 beds in the NHS depending on who you ask.  Flu happens every year and yet it always comes as a surprise or a shock etc.  Why is that are our administrators and managers so utterly useless that they don't know this?  This was my sort of bread and butter at work, risk planing and mitigation it's what you did and what you were paid for.

Then there was some other nonsense during the week of placing illegal immigrants in the audience of Question Time to ask questions in Immigration well actually they are criminals as they came here without papers and crossed illegally so why on earth were they allowed to be with other people in a studio and asking questions that were designed and written for them?  But then it's the BBC and I only watch 2 or 3 programmes max on it now.  I've almost stopped watching any TV for this reason.  You can drive a bus through their arguments and the one sided reporting, once you see it and understand what is happening, is actually sickening and anger making.

Then there are our "politicians".  I am old enough to remember when I looked up to politicians and you could generally know which ones were the real deal and which ones were not.  Which ones were liars and which ones appeared to be playing a straight bat.  Today you'd be very bery very lucky to find one that even gave a 5% truthful answer.  There's seems no shame in lying all the time.  Giving out false data in an attempt to ram home a point. Getting away with behaviour that they themselves would demand a resignation for and doing it right in your face.  If they say one thing you can bet it is the diametric opposite of what they said.  Those who would call them out appear to be sidelined or silenced and it isn't just politicians either.  Heads of Quangos and Public Utilities get away with it too.

The level of hypocrisy is through the roof, the use of false and misleading "facts" is also a problem but then so is the level of the gullible Joe public.  If they aren't lying they are using bully tactics and riding roughshod over the will of the people and just "doing it anyway".  It's from the top down and yet no one is getting really angry about it and the media are reporting this stuff as if it is truth in their own quisling way.

Where is the anger and push back or are we letting them just run with the rope?  Often that is my preferred option in business, never interrupt an enemy when they are making a mistake is great to observe as they hoist themselves with their own petard so to speak.  

How long before these people are called out and swept away?  It's a bit Old Testament wanting them to be overwhelmed by the waters and swept off the face of the Earth but you probably get my overall feelings from that.  Let's hope people wake up, start to ask questions, do their own research, work out the facts and realise the pack of lies that they feed us non stop everyday so they can "rule us".  Surely it's time to say no and take back control?

Goodbye Sheep

 We have four large fields to the side and back of the house and they are occupied by Sheep between May (ish) and now.  Yesterday the Shepherd / Farmer came and got them and the Rams probably need to go lie down and recover and the Sheep will be in their Winter quarters.  Suddenly the passing of the day changes and you don't know what you've got until it's gone for sure.  The rhythm of life now changes and perhaps slows a little.  

Already the Pheasants are out and about more and Jackdaws, Magpies, Wood Pigeons and the occasional Fox are more noticeable.  The Kestrels and Buzzards are also out and about.  We do not have Squirrels or Rabbits near us although Squirrels are to be seen a couple of hundred yards away in the woods.  Occasionally we might see one but it is very rare possibly as there is little in the way of cover from predators.   

The fields are muddy and water trapped near the gate looks like a small pond now.  I imagine the dog walkers will feel empowered to let their dogs off of the leash which they really shouldn't, the Countryside Code was written about this.

During the year I had someone come and close all the gaps in the house - we had old pipe run holes, waste pipes here removed had been temporarily filled and the Air to one side of the house had not had an up-stand built.  So far this year I have a total of no Mice whatsoever in the traps, not one which is a record.  Normally around this time of year the little fellas get in and I unfortunately predate them with my traps.  One year we stopped counting at 40 - yes forty of the little guys had got into the house and made their way into the Kitchen where there would be food and where the traps are set.  Yes, I did feel bad about it and I use proper traps as the "humane" ones appear to me to be anything but and where would I release them they say 1 to 2 miles away but then they are in unfamiliar territory and you stress them out.  

You are also not meant to relocate animals anyway and you sort of condemn them to a slower death than just using the trap.  Anyway - the good news really is that his year the predation is at zero which I am very pleased about and hopefully means that they are all happily living in the garden and fields rather than trying to live in my Kitchen! 

The Blue Tits have not managed to get into the house again either, goodness knows how three of the quite beautiful little miracles of nature  got in is a mystery.  Getting them out is reasonably easy but at least they aren't in here now although one is pecking at my window as I write this.

We Have Forgotten Who We Are

 I am old enough to remember that despite the troubles of the 1970s and 1980s when London could be dangerous with bombings and the like, the people were generally law abiding citizens and you didn't seem to get the anger and dare I say it, self entitlement that you do these days.

Rose tinted glasses perhaps?  I liked London for all the reasons a young hot blooded youth would.  Live music, drinking (not so much restaurants) later on the theatre but you could have a good time and generally not have any trouble or problems, travel was easy and getting there and back wasn't a problem plus I had the stamina of youth - I probably didn't need to sleep for a month (no not really).  I could do a day's work then meet some friends go to various places to see a band have a beer and then get the second to last train home and be up two or three hours later on my way to work again.  I was only limited by the amount of money I had and we were paid weekly back in those days and in cash!

Today I look at the deceitful politicians and the way people treat each other and it really is quite different.  I'd go and see my grandparents and they were obviously from a generation that had lived through the war as adults, my parents had as children and there was I with my long hair and flared trousers, platform shoes and the next generation but we had manners and let people on and off the trains before us and would help someone with a pram or shopping up and down stairs or escalators, we'd use words like please and thank you and mean it, hold doors open and offer your seat to people.  Courteousness and civility, they seem to disappear with people's self entitlement.

I always smile, say please and thank you and when on the phone I will never use bad language or be nasty to a phone operator as they have a hard enough job as it is.  Always get their name and use it when talking to them and always than them for their help.  It costs very little to make other people feel better about themselves, to perhaps slightly brighten their day but also, they've helped you out too.  

The lies and deceit of people, the in your face hypocrisy - just look at the behaviour of the BBC for example and the number of people entitled to tell YOU what to do.  These are thick illiterate bastards as far as I am concerned and those are the people I am beginning to hate.  Thinking of my career (my first one) I had to go to college for three years to get my qualifications all the while working on site.  If I did something wrong I could kill someone so that's why it is important.  After many years I was promoted and then, and only then, could I tell (I actually ask normally) someone what to do.  I had the experiences, skills, practical background and qualifications to do so.

Today, look at the dross the reel out to tell you what to do.  Politicians who have never had a real job and have existed in the system from leaving University.  Councillor, lobbyist then a local MP and what do they bring to the benefit of their constituents?  That's right, sweet Fanny Adams.  They are a bunch of pathetic, entitled no nothing naive fools and that's insulting fools!  What gives them the right to be as utterly stupid as to think they can pontificate on any subject is beyond me.  I'd rather trust Wikipedia or the Guardian than one of these low life smug gits.

It doesn't stop their either does it?  Football pundits who know exactly what is going on is Israel or the Middle East and telling us which way to vote and what we should be thinking and actors, yes actors, those who's whole life is pretending to be other people demonstrating their financial (in) competence and explaining why socialism and communism are good things all the while sipping their Campari and Soda from their multi-million pound villa in Jean-Les-Pains.  All the while the gullible drink it all in, bloat on reality TV and Soap Operas and pick up all the bad habits of selfishness, greed, excess and gluttony and think it is how to behave.

Roll on the day when the Electricity system falls apart from mindless green stupidity and we no longer have to watch TV, look at our phones and tablets and emerge blinking into the sunlight and talk to each other, be nice to one another and go back to having real lives.  Maybe we will reawaken that greatness and pride we once had without being called racist which everything is these days or some other slur like denier words used when you cannot discuss things and want to stop the conversation.  

Filing And Shredding - Getting There

 It's quite a process but I am getting there.  Four large dustbin bags full of shredded paper and a fifth under way and space in the office where there was none before.  Small steps and achievements.  It was a little sad to see the old company stuff go but go it had to, it was 15 years old and you no longer need to keep those records and other records, over seven years, have also been shredded. I thought it would bring back memories but not so much.

What was funny was to find my 1976 diary where I did band practice in Hammersmith with Dave catching the 88 bus and getting home really late.  We had interesting times and he said that he thought I played guitar well.  Also in there was a note about Dora.  Now Dora was a young Turkish lady who worked for another company but was on block release at the same College I was at and we got chatting and used to hang around together at lunchtime etc.  All I recall about it was that I suggested meeting up but it appears that I got her phone number now this is highly unusual for me as I was the absolute worst at asking such things of young ladies.  It must have been some achievement as it made it into the diary but as all things when you are young, we lived a long way away and I got transferred to another college a lot nearer me and so it wasn't to be.  She was really nice too and a woman in a man's world of Electrical Engineering.   The diray also mentions the Moorgate Tube Disaster which a few of the lads from my year were on, mercifully they were not badly hurt

So my diaries have survived now I suppose I need to decide what to do with them.  They tell an interesting tale for me of what I was up to.  There is also a bit about my friend (who I have recently reconnected with) Penny who was at the Royal London training to be a Nurse.  She is now in New Zealand.  I have no idea if she knew how much I really felt about her but as I was often in and around her area, we used to hang out together, platonic friendships I guess, I don't know, may not be all that platonic :-) 

Another full on attack on the paper and filing today and hopefully Ill get somewhere near organised.

The other thing that flew through my mind was this bloke who's being an arsehole is that whilst there's been a lot of what he is going to do and legal action etc., the bottom line is that he really hasn't been involved in the company in well over a year and indeed he never was.   His actions, and his alone, are the cause of all his nonsense and if he did take it to some sort of legal action, there would be some eyebrows raised as I offered arbitration and it was flat out refused and in the same breath there is the classic denial that he ever was part of the business.  Surprised he wasn't dissuaded from using that as what is it all about if he wasn't?  Yes - there's sufficient amounts of contradiction in place that it will be looked on as vexatious and the use of ad hominem attacks will be looked at poorly.

So that in a way assists me in my thinking about whether to continue with the business or not as I am reviewing that now.  It is difficult as the App is now on its second version and looks great and so what do I do, take the easy way out and shut it all down or do I run with it in the short term and see where it goes?  The battle in my head continues but at least there is space for me to operate in the office now! 

Driving In The Dark & Wet

 The M25 is hairy at the best of times but it was coming off the Motorway that the "fun" started.  Quite what takes over people's minds to drive so fast and carelessly in the wet and not to consider standing water and aquaplaning I have no idea.  Van driver cam up the hard shoulder and undertook us going across two lanes on the roundabout and so cutting right in front of me and you could see the rear was sliding.  He held it together but fish tailed away in front of me and then to cap that I had the guy come over from my right to then cut in front of me - it's two lanes people so the van made his own lane and matey boy - God knows what he was thinking.

I am by nature a defensive driver, having driven 30 to 40,000 miles a year when I was working in the 70s, 80s and 90s and so you tend to work out what is happening and treat absolutely every other driver as a full blown idiot.  You just know that again, like last night in all the spray and rain people move lane with not indication, cut in front of you or come speeding up to the rear of your car.  The behaviour is mitigate in some way by the power of braking systems etc.  Talking of which auto and electric drivers - stop touching your brakes when driving at 70 mph! 

Anyway, it was one of those terrible rainy, spraying nights, hidden puddles and idiot drivers.  I was glad to get back home.  I do like my AWD car though as it certainly assists in driving conditions like yesterday.

Advent - Here We Go

 Again.  Yes here we go towards Christmas and it feels very different this year.  I am being very careful with my money as I do not know quite how much this new pump will have cost me yet and so where I'd normally buy a bit more than I probably should this year I have bought a bit less.  

In many ways I am still not quite right either in my head and subsequently, that sort of makes you feel physically fatigued too.  I do feel mentally and physically drained and it's all been too much this year.  Whilst Christmas is often time for a great reset (that doesn't last much beyond mid January to be fair) I actually do need to do something about it all.  I launched the new version of the App this morning but I haven't told anyone (other than the Developer) and I really haven't fully decided what to do about the business.  My heart has gone out of it with all the threats and brickbat throwing of the divorced "partner" in the business.  

I wouldn't normally kowtow to bullys but this has gone a little too far to be comfortable and it makes me ill just thinking about it.  The crazy thing is that I know, in a straight argument, it would be laughed out of court but who wants that to go that far anyway?  His arguments are preposterous and his attempt to remove me from my position was also interesting in the fact that he even thinks he is justified in doing it.  A narcissistic egotistical act.  As I am not dealing with a business person or rational actor it makes things edgy I suppose?  If the business had some income and some money behind it then we could engage a solicitor and make this all go away.  We don't so it hasn't.

Anyway, that decision is hovering between just giving it all up or running with it and seeing where it takes us.  

So a month of pretending that this is all jolly and fun coming up.  Will I get into the Christmas Spirit?  Who knows. Right now, not so much.  Perhaps in a week or two I might feel a bit better about myself, the business and my situation?  Maybe.