Off out this afternoon

So I am planning, in an hour or so, to fix the shower riser pole and have that done ready for tomorrow when I'll fit the bath/shower screen.  It will then make the bathroom functional but not complete.  It needs 24 hours to set the silicone around it and then it will be done.  Perhaps I can get the majority of the bathroom complete by then and I just need my brother in law to return to so some minor finishing off.

I have to do some more checking, or rather final checking, to make sure that the bath isn't leaking especially around the overflow which is my greatest worry.  If it is clear - and it has been all this week - I will then put the side panel on, which gives a finished look and also adds some integrity to the bath side.  I have the radiator to go on and some of the bathroom furniture too.

So a full on weekend.  This afternoon I'm off to Surrey with Flocky Bicep for a meeting.  We are guests and the nice thing about that is that we will be treated to  a nice meal and some drinks :-)  Hopefully we wont get back home too late.

I'm working on what to do next.  It is extremely difficult to work out what to do.  I have some ideas and some thoughts about what I'd like to do and yet none of it makes much sense to me at the moment.  The basic logical thinking it through approach is helping get the questions and some of the options out and I'm using mind mapping techniques to do this but I'm not exactly getting anywhere fast on this.  I think the "disappointment" of the last two encounters has re-enforced what I feel about the majority of jobs and employers these days and it makes me sad that people you feel you should respect show me none.  I've got to a position in life where I don't take, or have to take, any sh1t from anyone any more :-).  By that I mean that anyone who treats me like dirt or hasn't got even the commonest sense of manners will find it difficult to work with me.  There you go, high horse time :-) I think I've just got to that point where what matters (and I'm not sure I still understand that even now) is to have an enjoyable life, little stress and certainly not to have to work with idiots ever again.

Perhaps I set my sights too high?  I'm sure I'll get to the answer and, if the truth be known, I probably intuitively know what that answer will be.  Maybe I'm just not prepared to accept that truth.  Something keeps saying to kick it all in to touch, drop all the things I do now and have a fresh start.  That's liberating and frightening all at the same time and probably a bit fanciful.  Oh well, once the bathroom is done I can concentrate on these thoughts and actually get on and do something.

Bathroom Blues

Well black, white and reds actually.  Reality day today and got back into the finishing touches.  It was grouting day today and filling in all the little dinks and dents ready for painting.  My hands ache like hell as it is slightly different doing wall tiles to floor tiles and I had to work a fair amount in really difficult conditions stretching over the bath.  All done now but spent most of the day at it and no lunch either.  

Am now finished and cleared up and awaiting it all drying out and I should be able to get the shower in on Saturday ready for use on Sunday - well that's the plan!

It is strange being back home again after such an eventful weekend.  I have managed to book a holiday with Mrs. F. and my mum is coming along too.  We are going to go to the Northumberland coast, near Berwick-upon-Tweed.  It is an area we have always wanted to visit.  My mum hasn't been to the sea since A and I took her and dad to Hunstanton some years back.  Looking back, dad wasn't great on his feet then and perhaps was already ill?

I have booked a place that is yards from the sea so we can wander out at any time onto the beach.  It is unfortunate that we will be bringing mum home the day before dad's birthday and we wont be there for that.  I had hoped that we would be away at that time and do something like have a meal but will have to think of something else.

Interestingly mum had a bad day yesterday and yet I don't tend to have had any bad days.  I have a picture of my dad nearby but it cheers me up more than makes me sad.  He'd have been most impressed that I went to Monza and would have wanted to know all about it I'm sure.  

Oh well, better make sure that everything is returned to the bathroom so people can use it I suppose :-)

Verona? No wait what's that over there

We somewhat amusingly had to return to Bologna to pick up one of the lad's mobile phone - yes don't ask!  We had also decided that Verona would be a good way to end the trip and we would go via there then come back to Bologna and on to the airport.  Of course, with the lads being out until sunrise, the plan never quite got there.  We had a late start but headed off that way.  Interestingly enough, we spotted Lake Garda off to our left and we ended up heading to the Lake at a place called Desenzano and there was a nice restaurant right by the waters edge where we stopped and had a really excellent lunch.  The Desenzanino Restorante made a lovely last meal for us in Italy, it was as hot as ever and we just spent a little time chilling out, watching the people and eating the most delicious seafood.  I wished I'd gone for the more ambitious menu which had a bit of everything in it but next time.  Mrs. F. has often wanted to go to the Italian Lakes and as we have seen some of them I think that might be on the cards for the future.

This is the side of the restaurant and where the couple are walking is where our table was - what a great location - serendipity works its magic again!

After lunch we headed back to our original Hotel in Bologna, picked up the mobile phone, stalled the car in front of a bus (that was funny and frightening all at the same time) filled the car with fuel and then managed to get back, checked in and into the first class lounge for a few well deserved beers and snacks.  The flight back was uneventful and I made my way home from the airport and Mrs. F. picked me up.  I would have been home earlier but as chance would have it the train got held up for about 5 minutes and as I arrived at London Bridge Station my fast train was pulling out on the next platform - damn!  However, all was not lost as I bumped into a good friend and bored him stupid with my tales of daring do in Italy.  He had just had a nice incident too bumping into the Long Jump Olympic Champion Greg Rutherford and chatting to him in a Coffee Shop.  It was the day of the Athletes parade in London where all the Athletes (Olympic and Paralympic) took part.

Some summer of sport because later in the evening and into the next morning, Andy Murray won the US Open Tennis and became the first Briton to have won a Slam for 76 years (I think).  What a summer of sport we have had.

I told my mate that Monza was mental - I meant that in a nice way - it was a really good experience and I'm quite impressed with the way the young guys I was with take it all so matter of fact that they can just check out something on the Internet, buy some tickets, reserve a car and Hotel and just go and do it.  Good for them, the opportunities are there you just have to take them.

Flocky wondered if I felt better now that I've been away and yes I do I feel quite charged up.  The trouble is that it has kicked off a whole new set of thoughts about what to do next.  There were some people making a great deal of money out of the fans at Monza, there were opportunities to see things and do things I hadn't done before and there was an ease about the people.  They seemed to be really easy with their lives and their enjoyment and they were being "Italian" which is great.  That makes me wonder whether it is possible to achieve that happiness about your self, your situation and what your lot is?  I'm not satisfied with my lot and that's going to be a problem that I need to resolve and resolve quite fast.  Of course being on "holiday" is a different feeling but everyone (apart from one waitress in Milan) seemed to be genuinely helpful and happy - OK they were in a service business (the ones we met mainly) but even so, it just seemed that things got done, when they were going to get done and in many cases it just worked.

Road Trip

Saturday and we agreed to meet early.  Well I was up early and they reckoned they'd be a little while later - we needed to get the car away before 8 and be on our way to Milan.  We were on the motorway when my Nephew said there was a police car coming up really fast.  It turned out to be a  Lamborghini Gallardo - painted blue and with aerodynamic blue flashing lights.  Amazing - only in Italy eh.  We then found out it was driven around the circuit at Monza before Qualifying and the Grand Prix itself much to the amusement and cat calling of the Tifosi....

Here are some images from You Tube of the car.  

We got to our Hotel in Milan and dropped off our luggage.  They suggested it would be easier for us to drive to Monza than take the train.  We managed this with a few traffic jams, mainly caused by the locals arguing with the Police about where to park.  It was quite well organised and we got bussed into the circuit but still had long walks either side.  However, we were there to see the Porsche Super Cup qualifying followed by the GP qualifying and then there were a series of races.  Lots of people left the circuit after quali and so we had a good run of the place and got to see about 3/4s of the circuit trying to work out the best place to view the race.  

We managed to get really close and saw some stunning driving.  We got back quite late and then went out into Milan for the evening we started by tram and got some of the way but invested in a Taxi to take us further in to Moscova area of Milan which was amazingly lively.  We managed to sit down at a Pizzeria at 10:15 so we again got back at about 2am.  We needed to leave early the next day and check out.  We kind of managed to do that and had breakfast (which was included) and again left our luggage there.  We arrived some 25 minutes later nearer the circuit and were able to park close to the bus and so by about 9:45 we were arriving inside the circuit, this time having bought our water supplies outside of the circuit saving 2 Euro a bottle!

Well, the whole experience was I can safely say awesome and a little emotional.  I got quite choked up when we invaded the track at the end of the race - the only race in the calendar where this is allowed - it was something quite strange a feeling quite unlike anything I've had before.  Perhaps it was the bit I'd dreamed about doing for a long time.  I've promised myself to go to a GP for years and years and this time finally made the decision to do it where I've procrastinated before. 

The ear splitting noises of the races and the passion of the fans, the whole experience and the warmth of an early autumn Grand Prix race where you are so close to the action all wove their magic.  We stayed behind after the ceremony for the winners and then looked at the old banked track.  Many people had made their way home already and we stopped off and had some more water and also had some beers sat watching the people stream away home.  The car was almost on its own when we returned and we drove back to the Hotel, collected our stuff and were then a little surprised to find that our Hotel that we felt was a lot nearer the centre of Milan turned out to be a few minutes from the Hotel we were in :-)  The nice thing was it was a Raddison and so we had great rooms and showered and changed and went into Milan after a few beers in the bar.  We went to a great Restaurant which I have no idea where it was but we asked the waiter to recommend the dishes for us.  It was great sitting outside, trams going past and lots of people drinking in a large square nearby.  Guess what?  The meal for the three of us came to 150 Euros yet again (coincidence??).  We gave a good tip to the waiter as the choices were inspired and very nice.  

We wandered across the road and had a beer and got home about 1am this time.  Interestingly on the way back to the Hotel there was a massive party going on.  It was the Red Bull party and unbeknown to me, the boys about turned and went back to see what was going on.  Apparently it was a 3000 Euro entrance but they managed to blag their way in via a side door and one of the bouncers for a lot less than that.  Apparently it was very expensive but the ticket they got gave them a free drink.  We were due to meet at 10 the next morning so we could get on to Verona before heading home.  At 10:10 I phoned them and they finally got out around 10:30...

Some Sunday and considering that we had been going for 4 days with perhaps 6 hours sleep a day we weren't doing too bad.

Day 2 Bologna and Mugello

Day 2 kicked off with a good breakfast - as would become customary, we would set a time for us to meet.  I would be there on time and the lads would arrive when they felt like some time later :-)  It's at times like this I realise quite how organised I can be.

My Hotel room was up in the roof which was quaint and nice but a little warm - so I requested that the A/C be turned down a bit for me, which it was the next day - the trouble with rooms these days is that the A/C doesn't kick in until you put your card key in the receptacle.  So as I was in the roof under the terracotta roof tiles the room was like a little oven.  

So they sorted that out for me nicely and it was much better that night. 

We decided to have a good walk about Bolgona, it is a lovely University town, lots of young people and few tourists.  It had to be around about 35 C and we stopped a number of times to pick up water, stop for coffee etc.  We decided that we would try and find a restaurant that G the photographer had been to many years ago and he called his friend and we found the place and booked for the evening.  It was only a few hundred yards from where we had been the night before.  He only did evenings and actually recommended the restaurant we were at the previous night for lunch - which we missed out on as we could hardly walk after all the food of the night before.  We instead booked a table for 9 pm and went to another nice local restaurant for some real Italian beer and we chose three different pasta dishes and shared them out - bread, Olive Oil and Balsamic Vinegar and an air conditioned restaurant full of Italians - perfecto.

We decided that we would drive out of the area up into the hills to see the sun come down over the mountains and to cool down a bit.  It was a nice enough drive and we got to a high pass and then decided that it would be cool to just go to Mugello as it was quite near.  

 So we headed off around the mountain passes and along the autostrada and got to just outside Mugello where my Nephew detoured to a huge reservoir that he had discovered last time when he took a wrong turn!  Serendipity indeed.  we stopped for a beer and hung out in this shady terrace.   The abundance of scantily clad bronzed young model like ladies had nothing to do with us staying here for quite a while :-)

With the sun beginning to disappear we headed for Mugello and found that we could drive right into the place.  There had been some sort of track day and there were Porche and touring cars dotted around making loud noises.  However, the lads had spotted a Go-Kart track at the far end and headed there.

 For the princely sum of 15 Euro they got to go out on the Go-Karts.  Unlike Politicly Correct, Health and Safety Concious UK where it would have cost you £50 and you would have been in a series of breifings, fire proofed clothes, gloves etc.  The lads walked out with crash helmets, no briefing, into the Karts, in their shorts and T-Shirts and off they went.  Only in Italy :-)

The lads in hot pursuit in some extremely fast Go-Karts.

We then headed back to Bologna and managed - after a while - to park up.  Friday night in Bologna - what can I say, by the time we got there - about 8:30 it was heaving with students getting somewhat plastered.  We got to the Hotel and rang the restaurant to say that we would be late.  The da Fabio is without doubt one of the nicest eating experiences I have ever had.  The food was brilliant they just gave us whatever was fresh from the market to start, great pasta, beer, wine, proseco and the main courses were amazing, T-Bone steak and I had Fillet Steak

in Onion and Balsamic sauce - oh my - it was just incredible...

However, the best was yet to come - for those of you who are pudding / desert fans:

This my friends is what was set before us.  In the foreground and most importantly is freshly made Gelato (Ice Cream) still stuck to the blades of the machine, in a chilled bowl.  There is Creme Caramel, Chocolate Cake and a Merringue Cake.  In the blue bowl are Black Cherries steeped in Cherry Juice.  There was some other stuff too :-)  This was served with a desert wine in chilled glasses.

After this we had coffee and Limoncello.  this time a tray of deep frozen glasses was presented to us and the bottle must have come straight from the freezer.  Oh my - we thought we had eaten well the night before but this time we surpassed ourselves and we had a good slow walk back to the Hotel.  Now call it strange or suspicious or whatever but once again the meal for 3 of us came to 150 Euro.  Perhaps they have an upper limit?  Whatever, it was a great evening once again and we got back to the Hotel at - goodness me 2 am once again!!!  this was getting to be a habit.

The city was still going strong and the discos and clubs were still happily serving drinks - the place just rocks.  I feel the need to go back there again :-)

If I thought day 1 and 2 were good then the next 3 days were even better......  More later

A Better Place?

I really needed that break.  It was pretty much full on in terms of experiences and I'm glad I went and I thoroughly enjoyed the experience.  Five days in Italy are always going to be memorable I'd say given the places I've now been to there, it is a lovely place to visit and the people are friendly and the whole experience is quite laid back - well - apart from driving in some of the cities.

So the weekend started early on Thursday morning when I was picked up and we drove to Gatwick airport which took about 40 minutes, dropped the hire car off and then made our way via the little train to the North Terminal and booked in.  As my Nephew holds a Frequent Traveller card and can take one guest in, we checked in at First Class (no queues), went via private security to the executive lounge where we had coffee and breakfast.  You could have had a beer too but at 8 am that was stretching it a bit too far.  We flew to Bologna and were boarded first and had our baggage tagged priority (didn't make much difference at Bolgna).  It was as clear as you like and you could see miles from the plane.  It was perhaps the clearest I've ever seen it as there was no haze at all.  We flew over the Alps and in to Bologna airport.  It was a pretty interesting little airport and we then went to the Hire Desk - this is when it got really interesting.  It took us close to an hour to get the car!  There were lots of desks but everyone appeared to have booked with the same one that was dealing with ours.  When we got near it did say that privilege holders could go straight to the front of the queue.  I suppose we could have but we may have gotten lynched.  

Putting that behind us, we were upgraded to a VW Passat Estate car which was good.  It was quite new but as with all Hire Cars it was slightly battered around the periphery.  I think every panel was dented so it meant returning it would be OK as it already had seen some close Italian driving action :-)

We headed into Bologna and stopped off to grab something to eat.  We were late so many places had closed for the afternoon but we found a small cafe and grabbed a wrap and a coffee (you have to love their coffee).  We then headed out from there to Maranello, the home of Ferrari.  We looked at the factory and the test track (from the outside) and toured the shop and had a look at the outside of the museum.  We grabbed our first beer of the day and then headed back, via some other obscure factory, to the airport where we were to pick up our colleague who was on assignment photographing of all things the new Ferrari.  He does this for a living and flies around the world photographing the world's top cars in fabulous locations!

He called to say he was running late so we went into town and grabbed a Gelato and wandered around the river bank for half an hour.  We got back, picked him up and his amazing European Sat Nav (which we would have been lost without) which took us via a series of almost impossibly narrowing alleys into the very heart of Bologna.  Amazingly we managed to get parked and got ourselves ready to go out and hit the streets.  We made our way to Drogheria Della Rosa, recommended by a friend and there had the most amazing meal.  4 or 5 courses (I lost count) and beers, water, wine, Limoncello and a chat with the chef and more beers which was great of course.  We dreaded seeing what the bill might be but it was 150 Euros for the 3 of us.  That's pretty amazing I have to say.  We wandered back to the Hotel via a few night spots selling beer and got in around 2am.  

That's the first day out of the way then!  Well not quite as we spoke to the Night Porter and he gave us the heads up on parking and so for a small fee we were able to pick up a 24 hour tourists pass for a few Euro and that meant we would be able to park the car up until departure time on Saturday.

Day 2 was to be even more eventful than day 1 - see next blog post.....

Lost for words

I think that "Awesome" actually can be used in terms of the weekend and the whole experience at Monza.   More will follow but let's just say that it was the most amazing experience, fantastic and just amazing.  The traditional track invasion was a very strange place to be, it was very emotional - I have no idea why - some sort of mass shared experience maybe?  Whatever it was, I have eaten too much, imbibed too many beers, proseccos, Valpolicellas, Limoncellos etc than can be good for me.  It was so hot that we were additionally drinking 6 or 7 bottles of water a day too.

Just stunning.  More later when I catch up on my sleep etc.

It's an important day today, not just as the Anniversary of 9/11 but also as it is Steve Kelley's Judgement Day Cystoscopy and so good wishes, vibrations and prayers etc going across the Atlantic for the right results again.....  

Looks like it will be blisteringly hot

The weather forecast shows 27 to 30 Degrees at the circuit on Saturday and Sunday so I went and bought some factor 50 sun block.  I should have got a mortgage out on that - blimey it was expensive £16 for goodness sake.  Mind you better that than whinging about being sun burnt.  I have taken a hat but will probably buy one when I am there.  Had my mum nag me this morning about that.  I had to remind her that I was 55 and I did realise and that's why I was buying some block and had packed my hat - Tssskkk!  :-)

So there we go, I'm almost fully packed but have to remember to put the liquid (sun block) in my luggage not in my hand luggage.  As I said to a security guard (where do they get these people from with no sense of humour - or is it sucked out through their Temple when they join?) "Don't you feel that with all these checks, liquids, take your shoes off, you belt, your jacket etc that the Terrorists have actually won?"  We spend 2 hours these days to get on a flight!  What the hell is that about?  Anyway, I must remember to put the liquids in the other case and then transfer them to the bag I'll use for the race!  Doh.  I've split up the main tickets and the spares, the ear plugs and the rain ponchos too.

Almost packed now and just about everything covered.  off to the Jazz tonight and then away at 6 tomorrow morning.  I'll blog again when I get back...

Getting near now

I have to say I'm pretty excited about going to Monza for the Grand Prix.  The weather is meant to be very good but in case it isn't I bought some emergency Poncho rain mac things to go in my bag.  It certainly looks as if they aren't needed but you never know.

Flying out Thursday morning and should get to Bologna about midday - in time to chill down with a view beers and take in the views.  Heading off to Milan on Saturday for Practice and Qualifying and then the race itself on Sunday.

Hopefully Mrs. F. and the tribe will do some more work on the bathroom whilst I'm gone :-) well I can but hope.  If they do the grouting it will be a good move, not that I mind doing it but it will just save me a job and I can finish off with the shower screen and riser pole and sealing the bath and shower areas.

My brother in law is over tomorrow so I hope he can finalise the bits of the bathroom for us.  I'll be off out to the jazz night and then will need to be up early for the off to the airport.  My Nephew has access to the executive lounge so breakfast will be on him and we are already checked in etc.  The wonders of the internet.

Yes - I'm certainly looking forward to experiencing modern Formula 1 up close and personal, I doubt I'll see much and will probably be deaf for days afterwards but it should satisfy my curiosity especially as it is so many years since I last went.  things have changed quite a bit since then!

Best off to bed now and get myself sorted tomorrow and packed.  Most things are ready to go I just need my check list and that should be it.  Will have to blog on my return.

Cracking on with the tiling

Blimey these big tiles are both good and bad at the same time - they go up remarkably quickly but I seem to be getting through tile cement like nobodies business!  Mrs. F. has just gone down to the shops to pick some more tile adhesive up and a few other bits too.  It's coming along fine and should be finished around the shower and bath area today.  Brother in Law returns tomorrow to do some finishing off and then there'll be one more wall to tile to complete plus I will need to install a window sill at some point in time.  

I'm away on Thursday and so I'm hoping that some of the grouting can be done whilst I am away and I can install the bath screen on my return.

It is actually looking like a bathroom now, the floor grouting looks good and I've managed to do the grouting without staining anything much but my hands so that's good too.  All in all it's looking 100% better than this time last week.

Done indeed

Amazing what you can achieve when you put your mind to it.  I got the walls sealed ready for tiling.  Then got the tiles ready for grouting and then did the grouting and I've just done the final light sponging over the floor ready for polishing the tiles a little later.  

The sealed walls have dried so they are ready for tiling which is great.  Perhaps I can achieve that tomorrow and that will mean that it will just need grouting and then sealing between tiles and bath and I can get the shower sorted out with its glass panel and chrome riser pole. 

My Brother in Law needs to come and finish off which will be great and with a few finishing touches the whole thing might be done by the weekend.  Of course, I'm away for a few days but perhaps my brother in law can finish off some bits whilst I am away?

We are almost there it is tantalisingly close but still a few more days until it will be sufficiently watertight and complete enough to use.  Mind you it really is starting to look the business now and when the tiles go on tomorrow we will be able to visualise what we want in terms of finishings and fittings.  

Cool :-)

Things will be what they will be

And that's today's lesson - things are going OK in the bathroom and all is well.  I'm working my way through the jobs and getting the typical interruptions, especially Government departments who have managed, once again, to lose my paperwork so I have to get copies and resend them.  I wouldn't mind but they took 6 months to process the paperwork and gave me 6 days to return the documents they want.  As luck had it we were here but if we had been away?  Bunch of clowns these people, they can't move their arses but want you to.  Now they can't find the stuff that was sent and want it again in 6 days.  

I have written one of my letters about it and have resent the stuff again turning it around in one day not 6 months like themselves.  Useless bunch of jobsworths.

So things will be what they will be.  Out for a beer later with Flocky to chew the cud will be nice.  Back to work, who knows I might get something done :-) 

Stress and Pressure

What stress and pressure?  Exactly.  I have no idea why I am pressuring myself about finishing off my bathroom.  It will take as long as it will take and I there's no use in rushing it.  Luckily everything is complete but there are a series of finishing touches needed by my brother-in-law.  He may do that on Monday afternoon - which is preferable as on Tuesday I was hoping to do the tiling for the shower.  That would allow me to get most of the work done by the time I go away but realistically it isn't going to happen.

Having now recognised this - I intend to take my time and get it right rather than forcing the pace and messing it up.  

Want some inspiration?

If that's what you need look no further than the greatest show on earth - the London 2012 Paralympics.  Shame that our American cousins are only going to get 6 hours from NBC some time after the event.  We have the full 11 days on 4 channels and it is just amazing.  Mrs. F. and L and her boyfriend have returned from seeing the Athletics and Swimming.  There must have been 20 World records gone today and double that in games records and personal bests.  It was a day when one chap ran in 7 minutes after the 7th place man but he got a standing ovation for all of those 7 minutes.  That's what has made me take notice of these games. 

I'm delighted that we have come out in force to support these games - it is a testimony to the sort of nation we are.  These games are going to change attitudes and to inspire many people. With wall to wall coverage we get to see so many heroic and super human efforts that it just humbles you.  Some of these athletes are winning medals close to what their Olympian cousins can achieve.  What a wonderful legacy we have given the world since these parallel Olympics were started in 1948.  It changes perceptions and stops us thinking of disabled people in a way that separates them from society. What a shame that other countries are not taking more than a few highlights.  There are also at least 60 less countries than in the Olympics.   

We Brits are generally a nation who see fair play and taking part is as important as winning.  Fair play is important as is doing your best.  You can ask no more than an athlete produces a personal best on the day - that after all is what this is about.  It's humbling to see these athletes overcoming odds that able bodied people cannot really understand.  There were athletes with no arms swimming away - goodness I'd be worried about drowning not being able to hold on to anything.  I understand all but 70,000 of the seats are sold, every session appears to be packed out and whilst I didn't go today I followed it on TV and on line.   Not absolutely certain I'd have survived the tube journey but everyone enjoyed it.

The bathroom is pretty much done.  Everything works (after a fashion) and I perhaps should have left the cistern to the expert as it looked a bit strange as it was filling and then realised that the filler wasn't installed properly.  Trust me to mess that up!

Everything is working and the bath is usable - which is great but final finishing off needs to happen so that the basin worktop is waterproofed and that the WC is bedded down properly.  These modern bathrooms look great but are practically rubbish I'm afraid.  I can see this lasting no more than 15 to 20 years not the 30 or so I reckon it should.  However, it may not be my problem next time.  The main thing is that it nears completion and it is ready to tile so I may be able to do that on Tuesday before I go away to Monza on Thursday.  Let's hope so.

Monza sorted

The final piece is in place and so we will be flying out on Thursday and I am really looking forward to it now.  Today was another mini milestone on the way and a barrier to get past.  Tomorrow is to get the bathroom finally all connected and tested.  That leaves me some small work to complete but that's OK.  

Monza is a bit of a reward and also it puts down a marker for me.  I'm still trying to work out what I want to be doing in the future and I'm hopeful that these diversions may help me work out a strategy for the future.  There are so many things going around my head and trying to analyse and work on them really is "doing my head in" and that's the trouble as I need to "Elephant Eat" the problem and I need to set myself some parameters to work within.   For example:

1. I don't want to work in the city any more
2. I don't want to travel long distances on a daily basis but might be happy to work away
3. I don't want a 9 - 5 job with no flexibility
4. I must not undersell my skills and experience

These are just some basic rules that set out employment but these aren't all.  There are rules of where to live, how to live, what I want to do and so on.  

Monza will remind me what it is like to do something that I want to do.  I'm going with my Nephew and his friend, no immediate family and it will be a break that will set a marker as it will be one of the first times I've done something like this for myself.  I had planned it when I got past 5 years but never really did anything about it.  I've then looked to take a holiday and take my mum away for a week just to give her the opportunity to do the same and take a break.  I've been a bit naughty in that I've made it occur when it would be my dad's birthday.  Specifically this means that she can't go to the Crematorium (which she assures me she wouldn't want to) and also it means that my brother wont make her go with him.  I see no reason that you would want to do this.  But the other thing is to give mum a break as she's had a number of years of looking after dad and not really getting a break.  A and I took her and dad out one day a few years back but that all revolved around him as he couldn't walk far and it was pretty obvious in hindsight that he was ill way back then.

Anyway - it was a hugely important day today.  It means that they can't see any cancer in my Torso which re-assures me that I can remove that concern from my mind.  It's time to move on, it's time to make some decisions and I feel that now might be the time to start turning things around.

Well that's OK then

Yes indeed, the CT scan was clear, the Cytology was clear and the Scope was clear, come back in 6 months.  It was very quick and easy as usual.   They used a new local which actually seems to be fine - they said it stung less which I suppose it did.  It certainly is better now it is wearing off.

The only downside on the whole thing was that there was a mix up with my paperwork which had arrived at another location in the Hospital.  So I was seen, eventually, about an hour late.  However, that's not a problem as it is good news.

In fact it may have helped as I took my Ibuprofen and Paracetamol up to 30 minutes before I actually got seen which probably helped the after affects of which I have a small stinging sensation but have been able to go to the toilet without any discomfort and that's great.

I am just going to take it easy now and sit down for the remainder of the day.  I've bought some beers in celebration which I will have later.

Lovely to get good wishes from all over the world and positive thoughts and prayers.  They were much appreciated and of course seem to be working nicely.

It is funny, it is a relief because I never let myself now think about the negative.  I used to go with a view that the result would be negative so that I could bolster myself up and make it a positive thing.  It's nice to turn up in a positive frame of mind for once.  I managed my breathing very well and I wore my "I'm Not Dead Yet!" Tee Shirt - made one of the old ladies in the waiting room chuckle so that was OK.  I was also stuck into my MP3 player (thank goodness for those) and was zoned out nicely today.

Not long to go now

Cysto in the morning - all cleaned up nicely with a shower at the mother-in-law's house.  Just hydrating so ensuring that I can give a pee sample in the morning and that I can keep going to the loo.  It sort of helps if you pass water a lot after the procedure.  I have everything lined up to go and so just need to go get some sleep.

More tomorrow no doubt.

Interesting call with mum

Had a long chat today about dad and it was quite enlightening "talking about dad" you see I found a photo which is here by my desk and whilst I occasionally get brought up short by it, the majority of times I look at it and smile.  You see he was a a nice guy and he and mum were very close and that's great.  It may not be my ideal of a relationship, I didn't know him at all well after they moved away and so that also meant that the time I had with him was very good.

Because of that, it's OK to be happy that he is no longer so ill as he was, that he is at peace and that he is troubled no more.  We spoke about how "bad" things were over the 11 months he was ill.  Whilst this is true, it isn't anything we could have changed, it wasn't in our power.  Mum thought dad didn't know how ill he was.  That's interesting as I reckon if you'd have been told it was terminal you'd have a bit of a clue.  I did however concur that I never really took it quite as seriously as perhaps I might.  By that I mean I had a life threatening, seriously nasty disease that did affect me a lot more than I thought but I never really realised that.

Anyway, it was nice to have a long chat and also discuss the possibility of going away for a week taking mum with us.  Hope that I can arrange that a little later this coming month.

Now to get ready for my cysto tomorrow morning.  I am going to just sit on my backside when I get back from that.

Oh well up and down day

Bad news is that brother in law's day got worse with fixing some of the stuff in the bathroom he arrived very late and was just having an "off day" - we all have those I assured him - somehow he feels he has let us down and I wasn't expecting him to help at all - the amazing thing is that without him I'd have struggled with the washbasin and the bath.  I think tomorrow (well later today) will see it finished from his side.  I will do the finishing off bits.

The good news is that Monza is now all planned and booked so I'm pleased with that.  We have flights, hotels, cars, tickets, ear-plugs and everything else sorted (I think).

Also have followed up on my suggestion to get mum away for a week or so.  We have ascertained that she doesn't want to go abroad so that's settled so we will try and work out a trip to Northumberland and that area and perhaps Edinburgh whilst we are there.  That would be nice as none of us have been there (apart from me on business which doesn't count).

I need to ready myself for Friday morning and so may have to get over to the in-laws for a shower tomorrow evening - I'd have preferred first thing Friday but I'm due to the Hospital at 9 so would be knocking on their door at 7.  I'll just have to make the best of it.  I also need to make sure I'm nicely hydrated tomorrow too that will help with the recovery on Friday.  I've got my pills ready and need to sort a few bits out so that I take the minimum I need in with me.  I always tend to take a bit too much but there you go.  Maybe take a folded plastic bag this time for my clothes!  It's a bit strange I'm not looking forward to that but it is normally all done and dusted pretty quickly and I tend to get seen on time and so I'll make sure I'm there on the dot and I'll recover by doing nothing when I get home.

Not a great day

A bit of a flat one as the brother-in-law got most of the way here only to realise that he had left most of his equipment back home and had to turn around and go back and get it.  So it's now getting towards 3 pm and the only work done is the work I've done on the tiling and getting the cistern ready to be installed!  I've left it ready to be completed but of course, without him here, I haven't actually done the last little bits of work.  Hopefully when (if) he gets here we can give it a stab and get the work done but I'm not sure it will be worth his while coming over here this late - unless he works late I suppose!

I'm certainly in two minds about whether to proceed or not but will await his arrival - that way I wont do anything wrong (I hope).

I'm beginning to get around to thinking about Friday and getting my Cystoscopy sorted out.  It will be good to get this done and to hear about the CT Scan results too.  I'm sure that they would have called me in if there was anything concerning or major.  Let's also hope there's nothing minor there either :-)

This time next week I'll be preparing to go to Monza - looking forward to a good few days entertainment.

Only been a week

Since the plasterer arrived and only 4 days since he left so I'm perhaps getting a little too impatient about things :-)  Mind you, the bathroom is almost there now, another day or two and it will be serviceable at least.  It may not be completely finished but it will be usable with care.

As soon as I can tile the walls and get those sorted out the better it will be as once that is done I can install the shower kit and the screen and we can really get the bathroom fully functional.

You forget how much you rely on areas like this.  It still doesn't help that I'm not in the best of places in terms of what I want to do with myself in the future.  In fact, that thought process needs to be re-started after the bulk of this bathroom is done.  I have to say that I don't think I'll be going back into the construction business any time soon though - this has been hard work - not that I mind that - it just reminds me why I got out of the business in the first place.  Mind you I've probably lost a stone in the last one and a half weeks through all the exercise and not eating much either!

Getting in the way

That's me that is.  Brother in Law is doing fine, he is pretty much ready to final fit most of the stuff tomorrow.  Me, well I'm going to retrofit a tile and see if I can finish off my WC cistern installation.  As he was doing to wash basin I was getting in the way and so I ended up doing odds and ends of preparatory work and assisting where needed.  The area to work in is quite tight and so two of us together is a bit of a problem!

Any way, at least he does this everyday and so some of it is quite natural to him and the fine job he has done on the sink is especially pleasing as he made a few minor tweaks which have made it look just great.

My only concern this week, apart from I'm now paying to have stuff installed (well I'm not going to let him do it and not get paid) is that I would have liked to have the bath available for Friday morning as I have my cystoscope.  It might be ready by then it just depends but that aside, I just want to make sure I turn up "clean" as can be for the scope and then I intend to have a very restful afternoon on Friday doing absolutely nothing.  I've learnt from bitter experience that after any of these procedures, you may think you are fine but the best thing to do is just relax and take the day off, stuff will still be there the day after.  In fact the family are off at the Paralympics on Saturday so I'll have a day to potter around in the bathroom and perhaps, who knows, will be able to do some finishing touches.  I've now got the instructions how to fit the bath side panel and so I can do that and perhaps some other areas too.

Our tickets have arrived and I printed them out - what did we used to do before the Internet?  It's great, you order on-line and then 18 hours later you get an email and your tickets that you print out and bring with you on the day!  How cool is that?

Oh well, a few more days of smells and dust and water and putty and we can begin to get back to normality.  I'm pretty impressed with my skills in the trimming the door department I have to say it fits perfectly...  I now just need to be as good in laying the wall tiles as laying the floor ones.  At least this time they shouldn't take 2 days to set!  

WC - not quite - bath - installed - washbasin - maybe

It's the sort of nightmare you think of after you've installed the bath and there's the masking tape to come off and suddenly there are small bits of fibre glass stuck to the bath.  Some come off with a pull and some with soap and water but my oh my this is taking a while until - "Hold on, this area has just rippled and started to move!"  Then we discovered that the whole bath has been covered in a very thin film of plastic as well as the masking tape layer.  Does it say this in the instructions?  Does it like hell!

The bath is installed, holds water and looks great but cannot be stuck to the wall yet as the plaster is drying but not fully ready for some silicon or glue yet.  The cabinets are in for the WC and the Washbasin but I've got a hold up on the WC as the waste doesn't fit tightly enough or deep enough for my brother in law's liking.  He has some at home so perhaps we can reconvene in the morning.  He is just fitting the sink now for us which is great.  It's sort of happened that he is available and has been here for 1 and a half days.  In that time he has managed to really help me out and the bath has a frame built for it now which is great.  I'm now hovering around doing small bits of work whilst he is cracking on with the larger stuff.  I was at least able to re hang the door, sort out the lock and put up the first unit and the cistern is in place.  I think I may get on and cut the tile that I need to complete the floor as that will give me something useful to do for a short while!

Just having a 10 minute "breather" whilst B-I-L gets on and does his thing next door.  Amazed by how practical he is - much like I used to be 35 years ago!

Funny sort of day that turned out to be

The tiles hadn't set completely but I didn't notice until quite late on.  We got the bath in and found the wall to be a little out (nothing unusual there then).  Carved a bit out of the wall, set the bath up and then realised that we couldn't finish installing it as the plaster was still damp - damnation.  So my brother in law is back tomorrow and we will install the bath then and hopefully he will help me with the sink and WC too.  Bargain.  That meant we could get over to sister in laws and that meant free beer for me which was nice :-)

Have just been on-line and in my halting Italian and using Google translate, have managed to book tickets for the Monza Grand Prix.  For a few extra Euros (15 in fact) we have passes for all three days - how cool is that - it means we could go for first and second practice on the Friday if we wanted to.

I'm really quite charged about it now and I'm just looking forward to getting going and spending some time away and perhaps beginning to consider that I ought to be doing some more "me time" stuff.

Cysto coming up on Friday - sort of hoping that it is good news once again - whatever it is, Monza will be only a few days away after that - how exciting.

Calm before the storm

So to speak, today sees the bathroom start to take shape.  It will be interesting to see if the preparation work I did will bear fruit as all I really need to do is to bring in the new equipment, make some woodwork and plumbing adjustments and the bathroom should take shape.  Famous last words I know but that's what I'm hoping for.  Not sure when I can do the tiling though for the shower.  I want to do that quickly but the plaster isn't fully dried yet.  Timing is everything on that.

My Cystoscope on Friday this week so hope that goes well.  It came sneaking up on me but that's good.  At 9 am it is also good as it gets it out of the way fast for me, just what I need.

Wow - Diamond Tile Cutter - what a beauty

I don't normally get enthusiastic about tools - I mean they do the job they are meant to.  But I'm really pleased with two things I bought - a circular saw which has enabled me to do the flooring (wood) and a diamond tile cutter which I used today to put down these huge tiles Mrs. F. has chosen.  What a great tool and amazing how quickly it cuts the tiles.  I was so pleased with myself as I didn't have any broken tiles at all and all my cuts were bang on the measurements I wanted.  How cool is that.

I want the floor adhesive to set now so I can get in to the room and look.  I have to say that it looks great already.  tomorrow I have one more tile to install and then can install the bath.  the one tile is an afterthought as I was wondering how to finish off an area and had a eureka moment on that!

I really hope I can get the bath in, levelled and fixed solid so that we can at least have a bath.  Of course there is the small matter of putting the door back on but I have a cunning and devious plan for that and my Brother-in-law is around tomorrow who is a carpenter so I hope I can use his assistance to install the bath and fit the door.  That will be cool :-)

Feel like an old man  - not in the biblical sense :-) with all these aches and pains!

Roll on tomorrow when it will start to begin to look like a bathroom again.  

Oh my what a day

We started decking out the floor but managed to have all sorts of problems with that, especially as I hadn't remembered the Soil Pipe was sticking out of the wall which made getting the first complicated piece difficult to fit.  Then my electric screwdriver decided that it didn't like screwing in around 200 screws into the floor, so I had to revert to my pump driver.  So things didn't go quite as planned but the new light is installed, the floor is in and primed ready for tiling tomorrow.  The walls are drying out nicely and I'll give the floor tiles a go tomorrow.  Luckily they are quite large so I don't suppose it will take a long time but drying out may take a while.

I'm a day behind which is annoying but can't be helped I suppose.  I really could do with sorting this out this week so that at least we can have a bath even if I can't sort out the shower by the end of the week.

My new memoflex glasses have arrived which replaced my nice pair of reading glasses I broke when letting the plasterer in last week!  These look to be pretty good as they are flexible and shouldn't break easily (famous last words).

Need to watch out tonight for cramps - got two nasty seizures last night along with a series of small twinges and also this evening got a few too.  

Nice place to be

My Dad's ashes were scattered in the garden of the Crematorium today.  He absolutely loved gardening and this quite new garden is a suitable resting place for him.  It was funny as he always said we should stick him on the Roses in the garden :-)

Well, he's actually under the Roses, bless him.  He would have thought that was funny :-)

Eat my dust

Dust absolutely everywhere and of course, it just goes with the territory when the whole room needs plastering and re-doing.

My mum and brother are spreading dad's ashes this morning.  I suggested that they might like to do this without me as it is a long way to go to empty the urn onto the roses.  Additionally, it is a bank holiday weekend and traffic will be pretty heavy with people taking the opportunity to head off for a long weekend, to the various festivals etc.   I'm sure that mum and T will find a suitable place for dad to be.  He loved gardening and I'm sure that the lovely gardens at the crematorium will be just fine.  I wore dad's watch last night, I tend to "wear it out" on special occasions.  I have a picture of him by my desk now just to remember him today.

I actually feel a little cut up about it writing this but in many ways it is a bit of closure.  More so I think for my mum and brother than for me.  I said my goodbye at the service and I'm building away from there.  It is strange but I'm more affected by it now than I was then but I should of course realise this would be so if I just look at my Kubler Ross diagram and remember what is like to come to terms with losing someone.  

I was somewhat annoyed to read in today's papers about Lance Armstrong, someone who's web site I have visited frequently.  He has decided not to contest yet even more allegations brought by some US doping (and I use that word advisedly) agency.  This despite the man never having tested positive for much more than the occasional pain killer.  Seven times Tour de France champion and they are tested every day and he'd probably be the most tested athlete of them all.  Despite that, they will attempt to strip him of his titles.  We used to have problems like that in Europe.  Luckily they no longer exist, they were Hitler, Mussolini and The Spanish Inquisition.  It's like us going back and stripping Muhammed Ali of his World Boxing titles.  You'd have thought that the US would have learnt through things like Joseph McCarthy but obviously not.  I have no idea why we do this in the West.  You get great people, role models, build them up, the press heap praise on them, we give them plaudits and honours and then someone comes along and pulls the whole things down.  Surely there are other things to worry about rather than pursuing someone again and again.  It's like me stating black is white all the time until eventually someone actually agrees with me.

Plaster Dust

Nothing quite like it for getting absolutely everywhere.  Even with the doors locked it leaves a thin film of dust everywhere, computers, TVs, your body (not so funny when you haven't got a bath or a shower!  Boy am I looking forward to getting that fixed into the house :-)

I am off out tonight for a curry.  For the princely sum of £10 our local centre is doing a curry night and there are around 10 of us joining 20 or so others for an evening of beer, curry and humour :-)  I shall have to rise to the occasion and be on my best form to entertain the troops tonight.

Plans continue for the Italian Grand Prix and the first venue Hotel is booked.  that's good, we just need to sort out Milan now!  Apparently the transport to and from the circuit is pretty good as they run trains between Milan and the circuit so that sounds cool.  We aren't in a rush so that too is good and can perhaps take in the atmosphere and some beers at the same time.  I am really beginning to look forward to it now, it has been so long since I've been to F1.

The room is looking a lot better now - the walls are covered in plaster and the ceiling is nicely done.  The wall I can see clearest is nearing completion and that's great.  It will need to dry out a bit of course and then be treated but that's fine as I'll be starting on the floor first and only go up to the walls a little later over the weekend.  I hope the walls will be strong enough to take these enormous tiles that Mrs. F. has purchased :-) it is amazing the weight you put on the structure of your house, especially things like tiles and of course the water in a bath - incredible weight.

Right to die?

This case has once more raised the debate about assisted dying (suicide if you like) for terminally ill patients and I don't intend to take up the argument or set out the rights and wrongs. I remember looking at my dad and saying goodnight to him as he lay pretty much helpless in his bed in hospital certain in the knowledge that he hated that.  He couldn't get up, he couldn't do anything much for himself.  He had some movement in his arms and could do small things like turn a newspaper and drink and eat but he could not move himself.  As I drove home I remember my mum and I saying that it would be better for him that he didn't wake up and that everything would be over and done with as much for him as for us too.  No one wants to see this happen to their loved one.

But I also thought that neither could I be the one that would help him shuffle of this mortal coil.  I'm afraid this bit gets a bit dark and a bit deep.  I knew that I couldn't put a pillow over him or "hurt" him that way even though it would end what must have been to him a sort of realisation that things weren't going to get any better and everything was sliding away.  I think, if it was an animal, perhaps I would have been able to do something - perhaps with a gun or something which detached me from the deed.  There's something deep inside that pulls you up a long way short of this sort of behaviour and I would have been unable to pull the trigger, administer the poison, cut off their air.  I'm not sure I want to go much further as I feel quite bad writing this but there is a trigger point that you just don't go beyond, there's a line of "acceptable behaviour" whether that's learnt or inherent I don't know but there you go.  I couldn't do it or have it on my conscience.  In the case above, you can see why the  test case was brought and you can see why it was refused. It is a difficult area of the law and of our inherent morality.

I'm not sure if I could deliver the coup de grace but perhaps assist someone to take them to the Dignity Clinic or perhaps some other action like that shows humanity but to actually assist or to take the life of someone surely isn't right?

Anyway - it isn't a debate to be had but it is a thing to think about.  How we deal with these things makes me think hard about those days where I wished something could be done but would never have been "Brave" enough to have done it.  Maybe I would be happier having someone else do it?  Messes with your head doesn't it?

Just added this which follows on a bit from the above.  

Which got me to thinking

There was a documentary tonight about Melody Gardot and I have to confess that whilst I have heard one or two of her songs I never knew who they were by.  Neither did I know about her accident and her recovery but it was an interesting 15 minutes where I pieced together some of what was said.

What was interesting was that her accident was a turning point but one that she had moved away from.  It was a reference point and whilst it may have affected her direction etc. she didn't live in the past but had that moment in time there.

So what?  Well it just got me thinking about that point in time, that reference point in myself.  Things sure changed whenever it was now - 6 years ago or was it 7 (this is good I should be letting go of the numbers after 5!).  But did they really start changing before then, is there a point in time when it all changed was there just that terrible day when the symptoms presented themselves?  Could it have been the diagnosis or the operation or the subsequent operation that really eradicated it?  Is it important?  Did things change for the better or for the worse?  Does survival mean a complete change in direction?   I'm blowed if I've got any of the answers for you but it starts a conversation in my mind about where you go from here.  I'm getting to a different place recently, one that kind of takes me away from lots of comfortable stuff, challenges what I do now and what I want to do in the future.

Melody appeared to be a real artist more painter or poet than musician, she painted words and I will have to explore her music some more as it sounded just wonderful.  I have to admit that whilst I love music, I haven't spent a lot of time pursuing that these past years and yet it meant a lot to me.  I have feelings that I gave many things up in the name of being ill.  I'd rather not do something than do it and whilst I don't like crowds and that sort of thing, I really haven't gotten to many concerts or been to the theatre or other things.  I've shunned the Olympics and the Paralympics (although the family are going) because of the crowds but I've made my mind up to go to Monza and see the F1 there and I know there are going to be lots of people there.  I'm sort of OK with that as I will have someone there that I know and that will be OK.

So thinking time once again as I continue with this long process of reassessment, testing and measuring the water since being ill and finding that there is little that I enjoy doing and yet would re-engaging with the things I used to enjoy be a bad thing?  Perhaps not, maybe I should re-discover them, I never know, I might actually enjoy them. 

A little more work than envisaged

The plasterer stuck his head around the door and said I ought to come and look at the ceiling as there was a problem. Indeed there was a deflection of about 2 inches at the centre and about an inch all around showed that the ceiling had indeed, after 70 or more years service, finally had its day.  This was unexpected and he had to take the old ceiling down and replace it. I assisted getting the sheets up and doing the electrics.  It  was some job but the new ceiling isn't going anywhere fast that's for sure!

I need to cut in the new lighting point and re cable the pull cord but other than that it does look to be taking shape but the problem is that this has added a whole day to the schedule and it couldn't have been foreseen.  

So extra expense but also the ceiling and the other areas he has done look great.  He is a superb craftsman and does a lovely job of plastering.  It means that I can't start the flooring until Saturday and so probably the earliest I can get the bath in is Sunday if I manage to get the rest of the stuff sorted.  As it is a bank holiday weekend I will have plenty of time and Mrs. F. who is a dab hand at DIY too will be able to assist me.  

Let's hope that we can get this thing sorted soon as even I've begun to notice how awkward it is having lots of people around with just a downstairs cloakroom and the utility sink to work with! 

Curry night Thursday night so I am looking forward to a night out with Flocky Bicep and the lads.       I fancy a few beers and a bit of fun and laughter.  Mind you, not too much as I will need to be here to let the plasterer in again on Friday morning at the crack of sparrows.