Not Sure

I had an invite from a friend of mine to go to a meeting on the Saturday before I go into hospital- I turned it down as I tend to get a bit "Cranky" in the days prior to going in.  Additionally in that week I will have already have been out twice up to London and have had my Pre-Assessment.  I wonder though whether I ought to take up the offer and go out and just enjoy myself?  It will be the first time with my new rank and also I'll be amongst good friends too so perhaps I might just do that.  I'll ask Mrs. F if she'd be happy for me to go - I imagine that if I am out from under her feet it may be a GOOD THING :-)

I had a strange evening this evening - it is funny when people suddenly notice how much weight you've lost - then they get interested - then they want to know the secret.....  Interesting :-)

Also some people weren't aware of my latest news and were pretty horrified and nicely upset for me.  I know that there's a bit more "risk" than I let on but generally, bladder cancer is slow growing and with any luck this will be a case of superficial bladder cancer, will be low grade and perhaps I'll get away with it remaining in the bladder - I certainly hope that it is the case.  Given the mess I was in when I caught it, I'm nowhere near the state I was in some 8 years ago now, I really had a bladder full of the stuff and constant bleeding.  

I do know that there is blood in my urine though as I can feel it - there is a very small "background sting" that you can feel not when you are urinating but leading up to wanting to go. It is discernible and noticeable if you know what you are looking out for.  It feels like you've been on a slightly acidic diet of rhubarb or something similar.

The upside is that they've seen this tumour, I'm going to get the offending thing cut out and it is early in the growth cycle.  That is good news for me even though finding it was bad.  Sometimes it is difficult to tell people that OK, it's bad news but the upside is that we know what it is, where it is and what to do about it.  It would be totally different and far more upsetting if they'd missed it!!!!