Active Therapy

 Had some ups and downs this last week but I have found that getting on and doing something has helped quite a bit.

I re-did the electric gates with new improved arms and control panel albeit it's never straightforward is it?  The Post has got a little slanted due to all the wind bashing against  the gates.  So I had to wedge that and I'll need to keep my eye on it.  I've strimmed the whole back lawn - just the front and side to do to complete.  The new LED Lighting is ready to be installed in the snug.  The mirror film for privacy has also been installed and the Bow Window repaired and added support brackets (Who puts in windows and doesn't put in the support brackets FFS?).

I've made an illuminated back box frame for the Stained Glass Window we had spare and used levelling feet but horizontally to fix it into the Chimney Alcove.  It looks great.

So I have been busy as you like which has stopped me doing the inward thinking that's been going on.  I am running through bits of my life that may have turned out differently.  My Angel from 2013 was on my mind then someone from the 1990s who I knew very well and just lost touch with.  There's I suppose the everything happens for a reason or that sort of thing but I don't know about that.  The mind likes playing "what if" and some of it is I suppose to do with the ego trying to get back in control.

I dreamt that I met with a girl I knew when I was 16.  She went on to marry a friend of mine, then they got divorced and she married again.  I don't see her often and perhaps exchange a message once a year or so.  In the dream we meet at some event Wedding/Funeral that sort of thing and she looks me directly in my eyes and her face changes and she says "Oh no, how long have you loved me?"  I say "Since that first day I met you and you held my hand on that late summer walk."  

That my friends is the ego trying to get control of me.  Recognising it as such will stop the pain but the underlying element of truth in that dream is real.