Glad that is over

Said goodbye to my old friend and met his wife again - only met her once before in 1994! It was a very nice service but RC High Church with Requiem Mass and it was a good 1 1/2 to 2 hours I'm guessing of real tear jerking stuff. Lots of children and all sorts just kept prolonging the whole thing. I just told Mrs. F. 20 minutes maximum, pull the curtains, get out and go and have a drink... Don't hang around, it is difficult enough without all of this padding.

As it was, it wasn't as bad as I guess it could have been and I didn't go and see the burial itself - I'd had my emotions stretched extensively by then and whilst I also had a few "moments" of claustrophobia - the church was rammed full hardly any more space left - I was also able to control that as I knew how to get out and it was a big area in terms of clearance.

Bless him, Flocky Bicep has given me a call to see if I'm OK. I go back to my Uncle's funeral when the priest said that tragic and young death will mean that loved ones never see the deceased old or frail and in this case, it might even be that this will be something for the future to ease the pain but I sort of doubt it as well. It's just too tragic that at 54 this accident has robbed us of someone unique - an absolute powerhouse of a man - it was evident that he was well loved, respected and was a fantastic family man. Just tragic that the 4 children have lost him but, like us all we only share the fondest of memories and wonder at his energy levels and antics.

I;m sitting here having a brandy and just getting over the day - it takes so much out of me.

Why does it take so much out of me? Because every time I go to one of these I imagine that it may well have been me at this sort of time in my life had it not been for all the treatment I've had! We all have to go at some time of course but it brings it home to me how easily things for me could have panned out. You see it's me lying there in some of these circumstances and I'm just grateful that it isn't.

That probably doesn't make sense to anyone but me. :-)