I can't quite believe it I was doing really well and was installing my friend as Master of the Lodge - I had all the words right until one point in the proceedings where I got a bum prompt and went totally off piste and completely lost the plot. It was OK we came back to normal and carried on but it screwed my performance badly. I never like my own work - ever - I don't like the sound of my own voice, my own performance etc., never have done never will do.
I am reminded that I will very shortly be thrust into the limelight in my other Lodge and rather than installing someone may well be installed myself. That will be a significant day in my life, it is very important and very special. It was nice to install my life long friend in the Chair tonight, he's as hard as stone on the outside but as soft as fudge on the inside :-) bless him, he was as emotional this time as he was 20 years ago..
I then realised that it was over 20 years ago that I conducted the ceremony I did tonight so actually it wasn't as bad as I thought it was. The trouble is, you always want to do your best or be your best and I wasn't. It's not as if it is a black mark against me or anything like that but it is a matter of personal pride and I wasn't as good as I wanted to be.
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