Emotion versus Pragmatism

I think of myself as a bit cold and calculating and yet can get quite emotional (as you may have noticed in earlier blogs) over strange things these days.  I'm currently reeling over my brother's assertion that dad can come home and that he can possibly find someone willing to spend time at home looking after him!  It isn't going to happen as we don't have 1 to 1 nursing care in this country and he's barking mad if he thinks that there is the remotest possibility that anyone will do this unless he pays for it I suppose.


Totally impractical as my dad can't even move himself up in bed let alone get in or out of the same and he requires 24x7 care and my mum can't do it.  He is no realist and believes that dad will come home.  I'd love to think that it might be possible but there's no way that is going to happen and the sooner he stops telling my mum this bunkum the better I'll feel as I may have to give him a call and a bit of a slap if he keeps pissing my mum off.  Doesn't he think it is difficult enough already?  At least his wife has a bit of sense and I hope that she will give him a bloody good dressing down tomorrow after she has spoken to my mum.  She and I had words earlier in the week and she and I know that it just isn't going to happen.


It looks as if they will be able to transfer dad to a nursing home which, I hope, will give mum more access and give him a little peace and quiet away from the hospital.  It will allow mum to get a little more involved in his day to day care and to have him nearby.  I said to her tonight that it is totally a case of what is good for dad and for her, that my brother's wishes and my wishes are not to come into that decision, it is what is best for him and her that are important.  Unfortunately my brother doesn't work like that, he felt that dad was selfish in not having the full Whipple operation when it was offered - easy for him to say and easy for him as he wouldn't have had to go through it.  The bypass was heavy enough and whilst it gave him a little more time, it really hasn't contributed to any greater quality of life (in my opinion).  


I really don't need my brother adding to my mum's stress levels and he does annoy me that he spends his time advising on medical things when he isn't a doctor just an administrator in the system.  He's full of great ideas found on the Internet but doesn't actually sort things out himself leaving it to others, like my mum, who he has asked to make a series of phone calls on Monday about this alleged 1 to 1 nursing he thinks exists.  What a tosser, hopefully his wife will give him a slap around the face tomorrow to bring him to his senses.