Eat my dust

Dust absolutely everywhere and of course, it just goes with the territory when the whole room needs plastering and re-doing.

My mum and brother are spreading dad's ashes this morning.  I suggested that they might like to do this without me as it is a long way to go to empty the urn onto the roses.  Additionally, it is a bank holiday weekend and traffic will be pretty heavy with people taking the opportunity to head off for a long weekend, to the various festivals etc.   I'm sure that mum and T will find a suitable place for dad to be.  He loved gardening and I'm sure that the lovely gardens at the crematorium will be just fine.  I wore dad's watch last night, I tend to "wear it out" on special occasions.  I have a picture of him by my desk now just to remember him today.

I actually feel a little cut up about it writing this but in many ways it is a bit of closure.  More so I think for my mum and brother than for me.  I said my goodbye at the service and I'm building away from there.  It is strange but I'm more affected by it now than I was then but I should of course realise this would be so if I just look at my Kubler Ross diagram and remember what is like to come to terms with losing someone.  

I was somewhat annoyed to read in today's papers about Lance Armstrong, someone who's web site I have visited frequently.  He has decided not to contest yet even more allegations brought by some US doping (and I use that word advisedly) agency.  This despite the man never having tested positive for much more than the occasional pain killer.  Seven times Tour de France champion and they are tested every day and he'd probably be the most tested athlete of them all.  Despite that, they will attempt to strip him of his titles.  We used to have problems like that in Europe.  Luckily they no longer exist, they were Hitler, Mussolini and The Spanish Inquisition.  It's like us going back and stripping Muhammed Ali of his World Boxing titles.  You'd have thought that the US would have learnt through things like Joseph McCarthy but obviously not.  I have no idea why we do this in the West.  You get great people, role models, build them up, the press heap praise on them, we give them plaudits and honours and then someone comes along and pulls the whole things down.  Surely there are other things to worry about rather than pursuing someone again and again.  It's like me stating black is white all the time until eventually someone actually agrees with me.