Limbo Land

 When you want to have something sorted out and it's still three weeks away.  When the App is about to launch but you've still got to do the final UAT and resubmit it and it isn't ready for that test.

So many things are just in that limbo land and there's little you can do until they arrive.

To be fair there are things I can get on with but not enough to get me sat down and just thrashing my way through the list and achieving milestones and ticking them off.  I need some small but vital bits of information until I can actually do work without having to go back over it and edit or tweak it.

It's like being an athlete called to their blocks and awaiting the set and starting gun!  I don't want a false start, I want to hit the ground running so to speak.  Finding something to occupy my mind is necessary.

And Just Like That

 My attitude has changed.  You cannot change the past, you cannot predict the future nor should you worry about it either.  What will happen will happen and whilst the uncertainty is there because you cannot second guess what's about to present itself you can only do your best.

I know that I am prepared now and I just need to control what I can control and with the preparation I have already done and following the process we will get there and it will be what it will be.

My brain has to go through a process to get to where I am now, a playing of all the scenarios and that being said, the rest will just be what I cannot control.  I can control myself and that's fair enough but I cannot control the uncontrollable.   

"There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know."

Donald Rumsfeld

Yes - That LOL.

Clarity Of Thinking

 One of the payoffs when you do a lot of thinking (and writing) is that you start to clear in your mind what things actually are.  Not a "Eureka!" moment really but it was not as yesterday's blog post a moral dilemma at all.  In fact there is no moral ground at play here. It's not about business either, it's about some sort of revenge.  It's a bit around about face in as much as clearly, in his mind, I have wronged him and he is going to destroy everything albeit he does not realise that even if he could replace me, he'd have to compensate me for all the work I've done and the investment.

He doesn't give a toss about me and he is being motivated by blind rage.  The initial shot across the bow was deeply troubling but smacked of something wrong.  Once I had returned fire it wasn't really accepted (even though I supplied the evidence) and the threats toned right down but the illogical questions remained. Now we have a business procedure to endure to remove me and the reasons given are the same as the first and second letters.  Then you can see through the cracks of it all.  The headlines for why he wants me gone are actually down to his own actions in the first place and he cannot see that his actions have consequences. 

I know people generally cannot see the wood through the trees but this is another level really.  When someone initiates an argument and then shifts the blame back onto you, it is known as blame-shifting or scapegoating within the practice of gas-lighting, a manipulative behaviour intended to avoid responsibility and make you feel guilty or ashamed. This is a form of emotional manipulation designed to deflect attention and control the narrative, often used by individuals with narcissistic tendencies or in abusive dynamics. That is very broadly what is happening here, he seems to now live in a dream world where, in his mind, he can run a tech business but he owns no IT equipment and almost lives off grid.

This fantasy appears to be the problem as he instructed me to do a series of things which I did and then accused me of doing those exact things!  

So rather than me feeling sorry for him or pitying him, my whole attitude has changed.  It's a matter of survival and he needs to get it off his chest I guess but his actions if they were successful would damage the whole business and his "friends" interest in the business too. If they vote with him at least I will know who is for or against and that will determine what to do after that.  I doubt that any of them and him have the detailed business knowledge to make the decision that is required and have no idea other than my statement to comprehend the magnitude of the problem.

In his blind rage, he has lost the logical argument and he has not undertaken his research.   You should never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake" is a famous aphorism attributed to Napoleon Bonaparte.  There's whole books relating to this and I've used it throughout my career.  On one occasion, a number "team" members were out to make my life hell, the customer however, was very supportive of my work.  So much was piled on me that I had to keep going to the customer and request extra time and money for the project which I submitted in new plans to the "team" at regular meetings.  It was an 18 month project and my 6 months turned out to be close to a year.  Once I had my work signed off by the customer, I casually slipped into the conversation as I was about to handover and leave whether he had granted extensions to the other teams who were responsible to complete the 12 months work (originally).  The customer had granted no extensions, no extra money etc because no one had asked for it.

So there we have it, they made my life hell but can you imagine that they had asked for no more money - they were still paying out for quite large teams (£ Millions) and no extension of time so they had 6 months left to do 1 years worth of work.  It was interesting watching the penny drop on the team and my arsehole boss who had turned the dogs on me.  My part of the project made money, delivered a sound piece of work, commended by the customer and they had taken their eye off the ball.  They didn't look like they were laughing at all.  

I still have my Programme Manager's Mantra from all those years back written by Sir John Harvey Jones: “The only good thing about no planning, is that failure comes as a complete surprise and is not preceded by a period of anguish and fear.”

And so, whilst it has taken me a while to get there.  It's now pretty clear that this is just a sad angry old man who's made a huge miscalculation, now doubling down and digging further into trouble.  He ignored the olive branches and life raft thrown to him by me.  Blinded by rage he probably needs to play this card which he supremely confident of winning, if he gets his friends on his side he will turn up confident of victory as he thinks (incorrectly) that he has the required votes to win.  I can just let things go on for a few minutes, let him have his say, and then watch as his victory and dreams dissolve into dust before his eyes - you need a 51% poll but the number of share votes you have totalled do not 51 share votes do not make 51%  it doesn't work that way. 

Recalling a similar outcome many years ago, my right hand man, when you could say such things to people, having been accused of something and we proved beyond a doubt that it was someone else, the culprit caught red handed as we were investigation with the customer, looked directly at the accusers and stated "Well, do I get a f*****g apology or does someone get a smack in the mouth?"  We actually got a very nice slap up meal!

So the main thing is that if you play the scenarios and try and understand what the motivation is and work out your numbers, then you can enjoy them getting their comeuppance!  

The Moral Dilemma

 The problem I seem to be having is that what's coming up next is going to go down like a fart in a spacesuit.  One of us is going to completely defeated and deflated and they don't seem to realise what's in store for them.  After some pretty vicious attacks threatening all sorts of actions, those actions disappeared and they presented a "gotcha" to remove me from office.  There's no plan to their action, they think that removing someone from office doesn't have consequences and it's totally wrong of course.  There's no logical argument that is correct and there is a naive view that I will hand over control of the business I've built expecting my cooperation and no consideration.

So that's the latest Regicide manoeuvre after me fighting off the first one and totally ignoring the second.  Third time lucky I guess?

But the dilemma is that it never needed to be this way.  It's a vendetta and there's me feeling almost sorry for this chap and worrying about it.  The old days I would have metaphorically stuck the boot in but now, I find that a petty thing to do.  Clearly he deserves it but he is blind with anger and has worked himself into a froth and he cannot get out of it.  I do not know if he's been Worm Tongued into it but it is his final throw of the dice and he thinks he is going to "win" and there are no winners in this there's no win/win and perhaps no lose/lose either.  One of us is going to win and one is going to lose.  He just doesn't realise that I outplayed him around six months ago.  I guessed that there would be one final throw of the dice and rather than picking up my olive branch he's played the final endgame, all in.

I ask myself why, when he's made my life hell does it concern me.  I suppose because it would be a shallow victory indeed and it will end with his defeat when I tried quite hard to get to a win/win and he felt he could not talk about it just pay more and more money to send the letters to me.  I don't know if he is doing this himself or is being advised by someone.  This last gambit is a big risk but I don't think he has worked that out.  It strikes me that no one has discussed this with him in detail or evaluated the risks especially as there is every possibility that the rug will come out from under him but anger and rage and vengeance do that to you I suppose.  

It's not fair, it's not a match of equals and has only one outcome and perhaps it is that that I am concerned about.  When I was in business years ago, you could get your opponent angry and once you'd done that and they started acting irrationally you'd won.

I will probably just play it cold and clinical, I don't need to shout I just need to follow the procedure, follow the script and quietly present the facts.  I am concerned that he will just get angry and become violent, certainly his correspondence is incendiary, threatening and ugly.  I just hope he will be too shocked by the outcome to react.  It's not nice being the harbinger of doom but then again, I have to remind myself this is all self inflicted and only he is to blame for painting himself into a corner.  

Ideology Trumps Common Sense

 The last week should tell you all you need to know about Socialism / Marxism. A government in deep trouble appear to think that you can tax your way out of some of the worst figures you've ever seen.  Huge debt, job vacancies plummeting and house prices falling with sales struggling.

The answer of course is to insult our intelligence, talk incoherent nonsense and tell us how kind you are by trashing their opponents whilst not telling us anything that they've achieved (because they haven't) in the past 14 months and taking a leaf out of Nero's playbook.  The way to combat illegal migration apparently is the well thought through policy of digital ID. Close to 3 million people have petitioned not to do it and their answer?  We are doing it anyway!  So by pushing this ID system it stops the boats?  Ihre Papiere, bitte! 

They throw insults at us, piss on our shoes and tell us it's raining and must be quite deluded because they think they are the good guys, they are doing the right thing.  If they all didn't have that nasty nasally thin squeaky issue affecting them so they can talk down to us as if we work for them I imagine is why they cannot actually smell the Coffee and observe what we see day in day out.

I go back to some of the worst managers I ever had and it was the same back then, so wrapped up in their self importance, they somehow actually thought they were doing the right thing and often said so and yet they had not a clue and stood surveying the total collapse of their part of the business and proclaimed that "it is good!" 

Not one of these people have any idea because they've never really had a job, never really had to speak to people.  Rules for thee but not for me every time.  They preach hate and think it is love  they are the very worst of us.

As I used to say and perhaps I need to start saying it more often "They are the very thing they accuse you of" for it is a mirror on their own thinking (I use that word lightly).  When you point the finger at someone there are always three fingers pointing back at you.  

You kind of hope that it all ends rapidly and we see what was described in Proverbs 16:18, which states, "Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall"

I Am Sure I Never Used To Be This Highly Strung

 I am quite anxious at the moment.  Dealing with irrational and unstable people used to be OK back in the day but this is another level.  A business matter is OK I guess but this is nasty, personal, ad-hominem attacks and relate to something he "thought" I said.  Rather than let that go it has metastasised into this full blown personal series of attacks and now a removal from the company as director.

Don't throw stones I was taught, keep it business (if it is business) and at least comprehend that there is no plan should he succeed, the company will go to the wall especially as he will not compensate for any work or expense undertaken.  Hence, it's personal.  Added to that he hides behind solicitor's letters.

We always referred to this sort of person as a coward. It's a slightly deranged, vendetta fuelled below the belt nonsense of the very worst kind.  He seeks to remove me which he can only do by now involving his friends, fellow shareholders for without their unanimous vote it cannot become reality.  Indeed if he garners their support in his head he will defeat me and then take my place.  Under the old regime that would indeed work yet he has not been involved for almost a year now so that his eye is blinded to the new structure which will fail his attempt at a coup d'état.  But I get to see the whites of their eyes and that's probably a good thing.

 But, I find it stressful, far more than I ever did in the past and I think because this guy whom I've known for a long time turned from a nice well mannered person to a rude vengeful person in a few days. It's concerning I wonder if he is ill? I am probably more worried about how he will take to losing the vote.  Ideally if just one of his friends having now read the accusations that he has made and then seeing his original letter that kicked all of this off abstains or votes against then he will lose his motion, without me worrying too much.   Here's the thing though, I out vote him and his friends and I am sure that he will kick off when he loses, that sort often do as they have no plan B and they fail to accept that their own actions have consequences.

Years back I used to ruthless in this sort of scenario and it was part of the job to skewer people who acted a bit like this.  They'd get to the end of a meeting to suddenly find that they'd been hoisted by their own petard.  Like in martial arts, you use their own strength against them and only afterwards would they realise that they left with less than they arrived with.

It troubles me that this chap is coming for me in the most vile and disgusting ad hominem way and has finally built himself up to his full height to face me in a meeting and his "empire" will crash and burn before him.  I don't think he has the mental ability to see his arguments lost and suffer defeat and I, feel sorry for him.  I don't like the idea of his inevitable defeat playing on his unhinged mind but as I said above, there are plenty of examples of this sort of behaviour, Hoist by your own petard (Hamlet), those who Live by the sword, die by the sword etc

I am trying not to be vengeful and I am finding it difficult given the awful things he has said about me and the off hand way he wishes to dispose of me from the business (no compensation, surrender of shares for no consideration etc).  So perhaps, just perhaps, I need to reflect on this that I am fighting my own internal emotional battle on his behalf, trying to forgive but it is my ego wants him to take a punishment beating for how evil he has been to me and that's not really the way, my way.  

The struggle is that he's a sad, vengeful, vindictive old man and I am about to deliver a crushing blow to his vexatious behaviour and I have tried to resolve this amicably but he wants "his day in court" well in a meeting where he topples and overthrows the King and picks up the reins himself.  He will probably be extremely upset at the end of the meeting and I care about that.  Maybe I do not need to.  I just need to look after myself and the business and forget about him and his strange behaviour.  It's like those neighbours disputes you see on the news where they've been feuding over how high their hedge is.  

It isn't worth worrying about of course, he's the one being an arse not me.  Whilst this is the last throw of his dice it probably wont be.  I am sure he will keep on sniping from the sidelines.  Good luck to him and to me, I just need to re-read this and re programme my head.

End Of The Month

 So the meeting has gone back to the end of the month.  In some ways that is OK, today I have the release candidate to test and so I hope, if all goes well, we can release it and start to actually turn some money over.  That will be really useful to cover off the bills and to know whether it is viable.  If it isn't, then that's another story of course.

The other matter is of course still ongoing and vexatious.  You can hardly believe how horrible people can be but then I had heard that he can be a bit nasty and now I can see what they mean. I'll be ready for him when he comes for me.

FFS, Of Course It Won't Be Easy

 One of those days - the meeting has gone back three weeks and so the agony is drawn out even more.  Oh well, I can stop concerning myself about it now and see how things transpire I suppose!

Whilst I dislike the stress this is causing me, I will at least have an interesting time when the time comes.  The coup de grâce will be interesting...  I need to have a little more faith in my abilities and not worry so much.  

Countdown

 Not the popular TV show, the countdown to the meeting this Friday to resolve this 1 year long nonsense.  Some people.  You have to try really hard to understand what planet they reside on and why they are completely illogical.  I did some more detailed research yesterday and found out some more intriguing information.  Some of that was procedural and some of it was things that had been bothering me and when you do dig deeper you see a bit more of what has actually happened here.

The interesting part of it all is that some of the language that has been used actually tells a story that what he claims and says is quite different to the reality of the situation.  The actions that were demanded cannot actually be enforced even if the vote were to go against me on Friday.  So what it confirmed to me is that the content was not written by the people who sent it.  My not responding to the last one was an interesting ploy and so here we are, a shareholder meeting and an attempt to oust me as the company's sole Director.  That should be interesting as at least I will find out and understand what I am dealing with.

The trick is to remember that it is a business meeting - he will treat it as a vent and personal vendetta.  I just need to minute his words and publish the minutes.  That could be interesting.  Always record everything and that's what I intend to do.  Always keep records of meetings and decisions so there can be no misunderstanding.  The production of such documents often helps to correct facts oftentimes badly remembered.

What surprises me is he knows my background, has worked with me on a number of documents and also has heard me explain why I do certain things in a certain way.  He is now challenging me on the very things he must realise I have available.  Oh well, there's none so blind as those who will not see as we used to say.

It's Like One Of Those Old B&W Silent Movies

 I thought we'd have a car crash with the current government and we'd just full speed drive into a wall or off a cliff, that sort of thing.  It actually feels like I'm watching a twisted macabre clown show, all psychedelic and almost unbelievable as it all starts to unfold.

Think of Buster Keaton in that famous scene when his car hits a bump in the road and all the bits fall off the car.  Laurel and Hardy too made a similar film scene.  But perhaps the best is the Laurel and Hardy where they and a protagonist destroy each others cars.  Each takes a turn to rip of a mud guard, smash a light until there is next to nothing left.

That's where we are right now.  The whole show is falling apart and there's no coherence to their policies, there's no combined strategy to deal with the threat posed by Reform who live rent free in everyone's head.  The various factions are all pulling in different directions, nothing is getting done because they do not know how to do it and then Mr. Charisma finds another idea whilst he's having his evening bath and shouts Eureka!  I have the answer.  He's done this a lot in 14 months and as there really aren't any adults around to stop him he declares that Digital ID shall stop the boats and solve everything.  

What planet do these supposed politicians inhabit?  Well I have no idea and this morning the Chancellor refuses to rule out VAT increases or perhaps changes might be the right way of saying it.  Already there is a reason that around January to April every year you cannot get tradespeople.  They know that if they earn over a certain amount tha they have to register and apply VAT.  It's not a level playing field at 20% on top.  I was faced with two quotes and one was around 75% less than the other totally due to the VAT and I spoke to the guy who was VAT registered and apologized that I liked his quote but... He knew straight away and that was a bit sad if you think about it.

I am reminded that this sort of thing has been going on all my life that they tinker with something and the laws of unintended consequences comes back to bite them.  Reviewing the latest stuff coming from the Office of National Statistics - not the headline stuff but the actual data, there's a lot more to be worried about.  The unemployment shows some losses but actually, when you dig deeper you find that state public sector job hires are the only thing that is propping this up and of course it's not real it's just spending more and standing still.  Underneath that in Hospitality (who must be taking a huge hit) and manufacturing likewise bashed about we ONLY lost 50,000 jobs last month!  It's a disaster and benefits etc are astronomical.  If a dummy like me can see it, why can't they?

Ideological theorists cannot understand why their Utopian dreams never come to fruition.  This is why.  I feel a mood in the country that isn't going to take all this nonsense much longer, fed up of being lied to all the time, watching the country go down the toilet telling us they have a black hole in their finances whilst spunking the money on weird stuff, stopping exploiting our own resources whilst happily paying more for them from abroad and with our cost of living going up at far more than the published 3.8% - I'd go 6 to 10% at least.  The price of gas has gone down but because they imposed a market cap everyone is paying far more.  Make it make sense?  It never will because all the departments are pulling in opposite directions.

Mention the Laffer curve and you get blank stares back.  There's not one of these people who has started and run a business, been in high office in a business or held a working tool or done a days work in the real world.  They instinctively know they are right when they are way off beam. 

Anyway, get the popcorn in and watch the bits falling off the car.  They see a shiny new car and we see a wreck.  One of us is wearing rose tinted glasses and It isn't me!  

When You Can Only Do

 As much as you can do and do your best.  Due diligence and research, scenario building and review, perhaps looking at "What is the worse thing that can happen?" 

This stuff is screwing me over and it is because I actually feel a little (not much admittedly) sympathy for this bloke.  It's wearing mightily thin but I have to continue to be professional and measured, level headed etc.  Thirty years ago the bloke would have got a bigger surprise as I took no prisoners when I was younger, it was my job and so many would try  but few succeeded in getting one over on me.

I recall that one of our ladies in the office heard me rip into someone and they said something along the lines of "I hope you don't kiss your children with those lips!"  you can probably understand why.

Now?  I don't want all this hassle and turmoil because some one who has thrown all their toys out of their pram decides that it is my fault and I should be the one who should be punished.  It's a pathetic waste of time, money and resources and wont get us any further along the road to resolving his problems whether they be in his head or elsewhere.  

But you can only do so much.  Thirty years ago Id have this resolved in 30 minutes, now, it will take a little longer as I need to prepare and cover many bases.  

Here We Go Again

 I find myself in "No, I  don't want to go [insert place here]" preferring to sit quietly here and attempt to get my head back together after another disturbed fitful sleep.

My mind, for what it is was, many years ago, was easily able to process such stuff but being an INTJ when I'm older is very different.  With all this nonsense going on with the company and shareholder meeting now arranged but requiring a lot of work to cover all eventualities.  I am not young anymore and so, what happens is a worry and doubt creep in and the self assuredness of my youth is no longer there.  I dealt with far far worse things than this, and to be honest, to lose would destroy the business under someone else's control and I could just walk away but the actual thing is, it's ready to launch, you can almost touch it.  My self assurance comes and goes in what, to me, is an illogical and not usual INTJ approach. 

I am meant to be out to see my friend get appointed to a very high position and I just don't want to go.  I don't want to leave the house much and I am aware that this is a problem that I've had for a number of years now.  So I need to apologise to him and I'll miss the meal I've paid for and all that.  There is no upside to this, it needs resolving and whether or not the current problem can be resolved will probably lighten or darken my overall demeanour.  

This time next week it will all be over for good or ill.  I am in a very strong position but when you are dealing with irrational, non linear, angry and non business like people, anything can happen.  Maybe that's what is gnawing away at me?  Who knows and it taking over my mind or more likely me just making excuses not to see the world is not helping in the slightest.  I had a few walks during the week and perhaps I need to take a few more?  I know that I need to do things but for now I also need to finance doing these (these are business things) and secure the business first and then I can secure myself.  If I can "steady the ship" then there's a secure base to work from.  

 

Worth Repeating I Believe

 The PM who appears to lie more each day now think immigration (illegal that is) can be stopped by making people have some for of 'Digital' ID.  

So here's what I want to repeat - the government and the civil service and all the other public servants are called servants for a reason..  They take our money and work for us and not the other way around and how many more times will it take to wake the public up and say that?  They work for you, not vice versa, they are "THE SERVANTS"!!!

It comes to something where the most outlandish things pass for policy, stuff not in any manifesto and how can someone so utterly despised think that this will increase his popularity.  Honestly, on the street, the man is hated second only to the Chancellor.  

After wasting our money on pointless virtue signalling rather than tackling the utter mess they and their predecessors have made they double down and it is now bordering on theft.  A few billion here and a few billion there just flushed down the toilet all the time.

Here's the thing, they don't even care about it, the way out of this crisis is to spend more, borrow more and spend it on wasted proejcts.

They also think that if you write it down or announce it (generally in isolation of other things that clash with it) that it will magically happen.  I wrote a not that I'd be a millionaire by now and do you think I am?  

Utterly pathetic and hopeless and I'm giving them a big up there using those words!

That Was A Rough Night

Old enough to know that if you have 4 double espressos before 9:30 you probably will have a brain with the synapses firing off.  So three hours after I went to bed I finally went to sleep.  Of course, I was thinking about this damn man who is trying to oust me from the company.

By this morning the notices should have arrived and my take down should arrive today or tomorrow too as planned.

Scenario strategies didn't help but there we are, that's what happens.  You should always, always prepare well for these sorts of meetings and have plans for any gotcha moments.  I have a few of my own but whether or not these are necessary only time will tell.

I do not feel sleepy at the moment but imagine I'll drift off for a short while during the day.

AI - Good To Have It At The Moment

 I use AI quite a bit and it is great to test out your ideas.  This meeting coming up for example, the Agenda, the letters themselves the statements and the procedures required and so once I'd got all that done I thought, let's try and see if there are any "gotcha" moments that could arise indeed there are a few.  four in fact but I'd already worked out two of them but it was good to just see what I may have missed.

There's a lot to think about and do and so the next step is for me to now put together the Agenda and a script plus any "points of order" and then produce something for the fil and then run it through AI once again.

It is interesting that a few points of procedure that appeared to be the easiest bits aren't entirely that easy so - we can have fun I'd suggest in trying a few permutations.  

Where Has This Drop In Brain Power Come From?

 The more I see of this current nonsensical situation I find myself wasting my time, stressing and frankly losing sleep about the more I wonder what on earth has happened to people's common sense? Where the hell did it all go and why are stupid people overpopulating the world?

Maybe it's me but this bloke has some perceived grievance and instead of saying so, talking it out, having it out with me etc., he just spends his time firing off sniping messages via his solicitor and when I offer mediation or arbitration he just doubles down.  That's no way to run a Ballroom ( The line originates from a comedy routine by Peter Cook and Dudley Moore, known as Derek & Clive.)

So now, here we are more expense, more fannying around to fight this attack which he hasn't really got a chance of winning and it's just pointless and so not worth it but I have to do this by regulation so I have to go through all of the motions and all of the expense (or rather the business does) to circumnavigate this (Acme) road block.  Think of me as the Roadrunner and not the Coyote in this scenario.

But it isn't just him is it?  I think it can be attributed to so many people who do not seem to "get it"  I, as you know, only watch a few things on TV, Only Connect and University Challenge (forgiving them their occasional Climate Change bolloxs of course).  I watch any decent sport that's on there F1 and Rugby and Cricket mainly - the rest I don't watch because of this craziness we now have to suffer.

Examples:

Leading News Story: "The chancellor might...." that's not news that conjecture

"According to scientist"  Oh FFS what crazy prediction made by computer are they coming up with next?  Excel, the solution to and major problem of the scientific world.

Electric cars are selling to Net Zero targets?  The hell they are, just go and look how many brand new (registered as far back as early 2024) are being sold as second hand with 10 miles on the clock.

The there is the "Expert" brought on to the newscast.  Look who that "expert" actually is.  99 times out of 100 it is someone from a pressure group whose point of view is not balanced.  We see this with all sorts of subjects - as you know I think the climate and environmental lobbies are no such thing, they are not doing the job they purport to.  Look beneath the surface look on the charity or companies house sites and you will see what these people really are, it's an illusion.  The charities are eye watering, look at the CEO salaries for starters and the cost of the board then the staffing costs and the expenses and then look at how much actually gets dispersed - you should be shocked.

 I find this constant blitz of word wars tiresome.  Where have all the Statesmen gone?  20 years ago I'd watch political shows (Robin Day) not everyone's cup of tea but the programme.  You would have some senior politicians of many persuasions argue their case and they'd be respectful, factual (yes I know they are politicians) and whilst they may have wanted to interrupt and make a point (as long as it was valid) there would be disagreement but you never heard the sort of stuff you hear from well everyone these days bandying around insults that they don't actually understand the meaning of, not to make a point but to stop a point being made.  "Far Right!" "Far Left!" "Bigot" "Racist" "Denier" what this does seems to boil down to people who do not have the mental capacity to understand what this actually is.  Your opinion doesn't matter, I for one have been called a denier and a stupid remainer and this by people who describe themselves as the "Be kind" Guardian reading class who, in my humble opinion should now better and act better too.  

I can best sum this up by one of notes above my desk years ago "If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail," attributed to psychologist Abraham Maslow.  For this is the problem I face more often than not these days.  Why people who have a problem exercise extremes of view and action rather than taking a short breath and discussing the problem I don't know.  I have no idea how much this man's subsequent actions has cost him but given the level of anger and vitriol, the legal letters and so on, he must have racked up a grand I'd say.  I surely hope it was worth it as a 5 minute phone call and a met up over coffee would probably have been more productive and a lot cheaper.

That's the modern way I suppose?

Morning Calm

 Having now sent out the forms and resolutions before me.  The chap wants regime change and to kick me out of the business to be replaced by him, this morning finds me a little calmer than I thought I would be.  I suppose because I have sent out everything, made my case and if the truth be known, I'm now kind of glad and let's see what happens.

I also think that the work I have done to argue my response should actually make people wonder what is this all about and as long as they are rational human beings, they will see that something is very very wrong, but that's probably giving people too much benefit of the doubt.

The room is booked and paid for, I only need to work on the Agenda and how the maths work in a case like this.  There you have it.  SO feeling a lot better today and calmer which is good as I have been highly stressed and anxious.

Here is the thing though, I don't really need to be stressed as I actually know what the outcome will be and I just have to be professional for 10 minutes whilst the proceedings happen.  If there's a "gotcha" then that is fine too as nobody wins and I get to demand 9 years effort and watch whilst they squirm to unpick the businesses complexities and work out what they actually need to do to pick up the governance.  

Replacing me with someone who hasn't a real clue (which suggests hidden hands behind the throne) could be joyous to watch especially when they have to get the statutory elements sorted.  If I am dismissed I don't think I owe them anything at all until I get compensated and that, in itself should be most interesting.  

Another Walk Up The Lane

To a different postbox so that I can post the second set of documents to the shareholders.  I posted the notice this morning, they'll get that tomorrow and then the post this afternoon wont go until first thing tomorrow so on Friday my counter arguments will be delivered.

It's been a full on two days but now, once this has gone we have to wait until the meeting to have a vote on ousting me as a director of the business.  What jolly fun this has all been and whether or not it is successful relies on what trap has been set.  I imagine his allies when they actually see my response will need to give their heads a tweak when they see the shenanigans that have gone on (if they are not actually part of the plot of course).  Even those who are will wonder what the hell has transpired and let's see if they are moved by my plight?

Either way, it's been an unpleasant few days and in fact almost a year now and who could have guessed it would lead here?  Well me actually which is why I'd background planned for the event and whether or not I am right time will tell.

All I know is that I am stressed out, annoyed, upset and have a serious headache.  I can do no more other than having to Chair the meeting next week and see what the results might be.

Ouch My Head

 No, not drinking, just working really hard to sort this nonsense out.  Why do people do stupid things?  The trouble is it drains me and I don't go into battle like I used to 20 years ago.  This stuff shakes me up and I suppose it shouldn't.

But what a headache I've got, so much stuff I've had to do once again for no apparent reason.

Whatever Next

 A was watching the rugby when a letter arrived and blow me down if it isn't this bloke,once again, demanding all sorts of nonsense but it caught me at the wrong time and upset me more than I thought it should, it is, after all, only business.  I think that's what they said in the Godfather anyway.  

Accompanied by the usual threats if I don't do this or that I've kind of had enough of it and it really did make me shake and I still am the day after though not as badly as yesterday.  It spoiled the afternoon and the evening and night as I stupidly tried to wash it away with beer even though I know that's not the answer or the solution to it all.  I decided to sleep downstairs so as not to disturb P.  Fitful night and once again, this bloke, what on earth is he thinking he is doing?  I imagine it would actually be harassment the way it is panning out.  If the business gets enough money together then I will get something done about it.  For now, it is ugly, annoying and very upsetting.

I think he is being manipulated or he is ill, one of the two.  The trouble is, its silly, the business is worth nothing at all, not a penny has come in in revenue and there he is being the big corporate bully.

So this morning I've grabbed a coffee and sat out in the sunshine and drawn some deep breaths.  I will just take it easy today and then tackle this latest diatribe tomorrow.  I already know what I have to do, you've guessed it, I had a plan in case this happened and so now to execute that and see what comes next.  I really don't need all this nonsense in my life I am meant to be retired and this is something defaulted to me.  I have to do the right thing but he is free to throw metaphorical rocks at me being the one that caused most of the problems in the first place.