A Little Thing To Make You Think

“Sorrow prepares you for joy. It violently sweeps everything out of your house, so that new joy can find space to enter. It shakes the yellow leaves from the bough of your heart, so that fresh, green leaves can grow in their place. It pulls up the rotten roots, so that new roots hidden beneath have room to grow. Whatever sorrow shakes from your heart, far better things will take their place.” 
― Rumi

My music tastes have altered as I disengage myself from past friendships and disconnect associating certain music with certain events - it sounds strange but I can recollect what each tune means and how I felt is contained in the melody and/or the words.  Some still unsettle me and so I've shifted towards some of my progressive rock albums and I'm really getting back into stuff that I'd left behind years ago.  Also some new stuff  - this is Airbag and All Rights Removed.

It's quite an interesting 50 minutes of Progressive Rock - well more Neo-Progressive really.  I'm listening to this, Dream Theater, Porcupine Tree and Steve Wilson at the moment and I'm retuning myself entirely.  I've had to as I was finding sadness in the other tracks.  It is sad to move on.  I was talking to my friend about how I missed reading to the Children - all the books they had, all the fun of bedtime stories and how I miss that but you gradually grow away and the kids grow up and move on - that's the way of life.  We look back nostalgically to those key moments and we feel sad but in reality we shouldn't because that's the way of the world.  We all age and grow up and it's part of this circle of life.  

I felt I was getting somewhere today at last and it may well be just meeting that one person that I may never meet again but you suddenly see something about people.  Generally we are good and kind people.  I spoke to lots of people at the pub and this young lady too.  Everyone was kind and pleasant.  Life's not half as bad as the papers and the media make it, they play on our ability to beat ourselves up.  I think I just had my "faith in humanity" repaid last night.

I haven't heard back from this chap who wants me to pay him loads of money back on eBay and he hasn't responded to my last response which was for him to take his case to Customer Services.  Mind you it could take weeks to sort the damn thing out.   Not that I worry about that apart from it just means there are loose ends floating around as I move.  I'm sure it will all come out in the wash.

So off in the morning to go look at some houses and see where we stand with that.   It is half way through January now and I think that we thought we would have been sorted and in a place by now :-)  Maybe once we know tomorrow or Friday we can actually sort out and get the place and get cracking.  I was playing with some figures earlier and the hit this is going to make on my savings is eye watering - there the flat, bills and all that but of course, setting up a business all costs money and whilst I can slowly bring in some of the stuff - the key equipment is needed from day one!  Well week one perhaps.  

It's all a big adventure, a new start and a new life.  Whatever happens I just need to enjoy it and not forget that.  Quite how you measure your "enjoyment" I'm not sure but I do intend to make sure that I enjoy my freedom and actually do something with it.