Well today is the big day

We launch the service or rather we launch the business I think is more the case.

Lots to do and some heavy work this afternoon at the first Regional Director's Conference.

I can see I will be having some fun as we thrash out our strategy for the next three months.

C and I are going and we will pop into some friends who don't live too far away from where we are going. Hopefully it will be a nice few days.

So what about my health?

Well I am feeling very well if slightly over weight - I'm not actually overweight it is just that I haven't lost any these past two weeks and tomorrow with the launch party I'm not likely too either! The BCG has made me think twice about exercising too soon after it and frankly I didn't feel like it at all on Tuesday or Wednesday. I think that it was quite a shock to the system this week. Even so though I am feeling remarkably well and I think the job also has a big factor in these things. You feel valued and you have something to do.

I've got the new tablet PC all sorted out - what a beauty it is as well, handwriting recognition so I can use it like a note pad. I just need to get up to speed with that of course as it recognises most of my writing but it is speed and accuracy that I want so I can use it to take notes in meetings. I can type faster than I can write into it at the moment.

That was a bit of a digression from the subject wasn't it :-)

Anyway, feeling great and despite the pummeling I took on Monday and Tuesday - I'm OK. Next Monday - half way through the treatment. That is important to me as it will mean that it is all down hill from there.

Oh No

Next week is absolutely crammed full of stuff. I have a few other projects on the go and - typical - they have now turned urgent just as I am trying to get the new job on the go. What a nuisance. Oh well I am seeing the guys tomorrow - they will have to do without seeing me face to face next week and rely on me being on the phone.

All good fun. The trouble also is I need to get my blood done so that is hours out of my schedule too. Damn and blast.

Overcame that problem

And I managed to get a good night's sleep at last. Perhaps too charged up about the job? Who knows.

At least I am ready for today - I have a shed load to do before going to the launch party tomorrow.

Sleep - and the lack of it

I have no idea what is going on but I am still feeling really perky and feel as if I could go for another 24 hours. I am bgining to wonder if it is some sort of side effect or is caused by the very long time that I rest after the treatment. I tend to sleep for about 14 or more hours across Monday and Tuesday.

I really do want to get some sleep tonight and it appears to be as far away as ever.

Ho hum.

Ooh Nice New Shiny PC

I decided that to do this new job properly I ought to have a new PC. Well, I got a tablet PC, one you can write on with a special pen and that does handwriting recognition. That is great. I also was surprised to get a digital TV set up with it.

It is all shiny and new and taking ages to configure properly. The amazing thing is that this is probably the smallest PC I have ever owned yet it is more powerful than my other two combined!

Amazing

That's your insurance buggered too

Apparently - cannot cover me for bladder cancer or anything relating to it nor will it cover the rest of the household if they are affected by that either. In other words if something happens to me, they are not covered if it relates to the BC!

I thought that might happen.

Second Tuesday Night in a row

No sleep - not a wink. Last week I thought it must be adrenaline what with starting the job, needing to be up early and all that but not, last night I was wide awake all night. I finally got a few hours between 6 and 8 and I'm not particularly tired now.

I wonder if it the side effects of the treatment? Last week I probably only slept a few hours from Tuesday through to Thursday. I'll keep my eye on that as I don't feel particularly tired and perhaps my immune system is up at peak? who knows.

What is all that about

Sometimes you wonder. Can I make a meeting tomorrow. Well given about a few hours notice no not really. E-mail is no substitute for picking up the phone and talking.

It does drive me barmy that it is treated as if it is a done deal. If I e-mailed it will happen.

Many years ago I got all the way to my office - 75 miles away to be confronted with an e-mail sent on a Friday night to attend a meeting at 9 on the Monday in London. Which was pretty rich as I read the e-mail at 8 and was at least 2 hours drive from London. My subordinate learnt a few new words when I phoned him.

It looks like I might have to do some education here.

Still not quite right

I do tend to forget this - even now after what? Close to a year of having this.

These treatments aren't like taking an Aspirin - this is something beyond most people's comprehension (thank goodness) including my own most of the time. I have to remind myself that drastic diseases need drastic actions. So having side effects and all that go with the territory and I don't know why I expect that it will be plain sailing or easy or something like that.

I still haven't got it into my head some of the fundamental stuff. It is perhaps the way I have approached it and tackled it that does this.

Anyway, I'm OK now yet still a little bit aching and stinging but I can feel it improving. I haven't had any tablets today to control it - perhaps I should have?

I'm hoping that I will feel a lot better tomorrow as I have a lot to get through.

24 Hours later

And things are just slowly settling back to normal. It can really beat you up and every now and then you get a little stinger to remind you about things.

I don't recall this before but I've certainly had all of the side effects they suggested I would this time.

A friend phoned up last night and once I answered thought better of it and will phone tonight - you just can't tell how you will react with this stuff. I certainly sounded quite rough last night though.

That was challenging

Not painful but challenging. I'm only just about coming out of the aching and drained feeling I had last night.

It feels like Ive been punched around the stomach and lower back and my legs and shoulders ache - not a lot but enough to notice, I had the slightly feverish "flu like" symptoms last night and on top of that there was only a little blood this time but plenty of ooze (shall we call it) which is the bladder lining. The problem - as you may imagine - is that passing anything like that out of where you normally only pass liquids does lead to a few tears in your eyes as it does tend to sting. Hence drink lots of fluids to help get the stuff out as fast as possible. I took my tablets anyway and have also learnt not to go to the toilet too often as that really doesn't help either.

Sleep and rest are the only way to get through this so I've probably slept for 14 hours but do feel better for that. Through all of this you have to tell yourself that you are now a 1/3 of the way through the treatment and next week you will be 1/2 way through. Only 4 to go and I get the Summer off!

This Just Arrived - Cheek

The trouble is I recognise nearly all of them and already forgot who sent it to me!

PERKS OF BEING OVER 45

1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.

3. No one expects you to run--anywhere.

4. People call at 9 p.m. and ask, Did I wake you????

5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

7. Things you buy now won't wear out.

8. You can eat supper at 4 p.m. .

9. You can live without sex but not your glasses.

10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.

13. You sing along with elevator music.

14. Your eyes won't get much worse.

15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

19. You can't remember who sent you this list .

And you notice these are all in Big Print for your convenience.

A bit better than last week

Although it was 30 minutes late - I was lucky as I bumped into someone I knew who helped me pass the time.

Nowhere near as bad as last time thank goodness. Before I get into the next phase, I've just had my bit of toast and Ibuprofen and Paracetamol I thought I'd write down that it was much better this time.

Treatment #2

I've just seen the time and this morning has been really busy and time has marched on. I need to go and have an early lunch and have my last drink before the treatment.

Back to my rituals and setting things out and I should be a little better prepared this week.

And now for something completely different

Tomorrow will be interesting as I work out how to balance the work I have to do with the new job, with the consultancy I am doing and with some other work that just doesn't seem to want to go away!

The treatment will mean that I will be a third of the way through after this next one. I have to watch out for this one as the last time the second one was like getting hit by a truck and then the truck reversed over me. I hope to be ready for it this time.

It will be interesting to see quite how I am going to fit all of this in.

Slept Well

I needed to as I'd had little in the way of decent sleep all week. This coming week is going to be going at a frenetic pace as I get up to speed with the new job and work out how to re-schedule the stuff that I also need to be doing.

The great thing is that I'm in the early stages of building a business and it is really exciting. The bad thing is that all else goes haywire whilst you are doing it.

Knackered

Off to bed - the week is catching up on me and I am as tired as you like. I even slept through half of the Canadian Grand Prix qualifying - unheard of.

A little bit concerning

I have a copy of the letter that went to my Doctor from my Consultant. It says a different thing to what I was told!

I was told precancerous and yet the "small area shows CIS" sort of shook me a bit. I thought that precancerous was non malignant where CIS was pretty damn nasty really.

I don't think it is anything to worry too much about as - let's face it - there was more CIS than anything else around last time.

So - I might just seek a clarification of the point in the letter just to make sure that what we spoke about and what the letter actually says are one and the same thing.

Today was great - lots of interest and pleasure that I was back to being in a situation where control was the watch word.

Been a test of stamina

This past three days I have been driving a lot, in and out of meetings and - living out of a suitcase.

I remembered to take my tablets though but the diet sort of went all over the place. Those cooked breakfasts were hard to resist - so I didn't resist - oh and black pudding as well this morning.

I've been feeling the effects of the treatment all week so far. Not massively painful, an occasional twang of discomfort or a sting and I don't remember being quite so stinging last time. The worst of this is you just get over the last one and it is time for the next one.

It is a crazy day tomorrow, my Lodge is meeting and it is the most important day of the year as the new Master goes into the Chair. So we get lots of guests and more members than normal. This is one of the largest meetings I can remember of recent years. I hope that it will be good but I have lots of work this evening to make sure it runs properly.