I'm in a good place this morning. Things look fine, life's back to normal (well what we describe as normal in this house) and I'm happy that I've had a good night's sleep and that I can now rationalise where I am.
I'm now thinking about what response I need to make in relation to this news. By that I mean that my medical team are going to do an operation, take biopsies and come up with a plan what they want to do. Likewise, I need to come up with a plan about what I need to do. The trouble with Bladder Cancer is that it can recur and it can be treated but can I do anything, in myself, to stop it? I've changed my lifestyle - but have I changed it enough? Those are the questions I need to ask myself now.
My GP of a few years ago, sadly now no longer at the practice - I got on with him really well - suggested to me that I don't live like a Hermit. That lifestyle changes needed to be balanced. I had managed to flip into the most frugal diet when I should have been eating to repair myself. So I'm going to spend a little time mulling over what I am going to do to take charge of the situation myself.
It isn't as disappointing or upsetting as you may think it is - if you know this disease - you know this can happen but it isn't like when I was diagnosed when it had been growing inside me unknown about and was a major problem when the symptoms arrived. This is a small red patch that they can't identify from a scope - early doors - easy to do something about.
No, I'm OK about this. Other's are having difficulty with it - I do my best to reassure them more that I have to reassure myself.
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