Well, it didn't end up quite like I expected it to. I got to bed and had a flash back of the claustrophobia bit I suffered last year and that made me feel quite ill and then the black puppy (it wasn't the Black Dog) came and sowed a little seed of doubt in my mind and for 10 to 20 minutes I came back into my office and just did some deep breathing and a bit of rationalising in my head.
I suppose I was just disappointed about things and the outcome and apprehensive as to what this now means to me. I'm pre-empting the meeting and what the outcome of that meeting will be and indeed the prognosis. I was planning ahead for full BCGs and goodness knows what else.
I realise that I will be having a lot more operations than I thought I would need but there's the rub.
I was doing quite well until that little voice in my head started. So far it is a mere whisper and I hope it stays that way.
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