Tuesday, July 23, 2024

A Vertigo Morning

 An occasional rough morning.  Quite groggy still (it's early afternoon). It felt like I hadn't eaten for a few days that sort of slight sickness of an empty stomach and then the dizziness hit me.  Yuck, I don't like the feeling at all, I had to entertain the grandson from quite early in the morning until after breakfast and then just went and sat down in my chair and dozed a little to try and work it off.

Sort of OK now, still a little heady and my right ear (for which I've had trouble all my life) is certainly misbehaving.  Probably it's that causing the dizzy spells.

Other than that, I have started to try and settle myself down a bit and to try some relaxing techniques.  I am not sure the CBD oil has actually helped me at all.  I thought I'd give it one more try and the jury's out on its effectiveness with me.

Do let's see how I get on, I'm due out tonight to see some friends.  I think I'll not actually drink anything and in fact I'm erring on the side of keeping away from alcohol for a while.  I like a beer at the end of a day but I think I need to give it a rest for a while and see what happens.

Fighting the pain body still although not as bad as it was last week and the vivid dreams are no longer with me and I'm hoping that these give me a rest too.  It's difficult when you are fighting your own brain FFS.  It's certainly no use looking back at what might have been as nothing can be done about that no matter how much you wish for things to be different.

I've now got to tackle expectations too really as I had plans for a future that haven't materialized and those too, are totally out of my control and whilst you might like to think you are in control, I doubt that any of us truly are.  

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