You know that I found the photo yesterday a little bit of a shock just jolting me back through the years and I wrote about it here Glimpsing My Angel a few years ago. I suppose this sums up (badly) how I felt at the time and I guess yesterday was a replay. I, of course, felt quite nostalgic and recalled all the wonderful times we shared but this time it wasn't as vivid nor was it with that dream wish that it would all come right, that we would be together again. She has her life and I have mine and daring to dream that it would all come together and the Planets and Stars would align to make it so probably sits with the fairies of winning the Lottery and so on.
The nice thing is that I can recall the lovely times we spent together and the time during that summer, recall our songs, the times we spent talking for hours on end, sharing our favourite music and getting to know each other. The twinge of the breakup is indeed there but it no longer hurts or haunts me. The thing was that it actually happened, that it was perfect and that I was granted a brief time with her.
It is what it is and can be no different (I sound like Morpheus from the Matrix!) of course it would be nice if it were different but it isn't, this is it, this is what happened, what life had in store and nothing either of us could have done would have prevented the outcome at all.
So today I am content at last and will not beat myself up about something that happened 13 years ago. So much has happened in all that time too so it no longer matters.
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