I am certainly struggling at the moment, no doubt about it and a lot has to do with having no plan or idea where I go from here. My daughter is on a world trip taking a year out of work and good on her. Suddenly I am left without the job/project/business and boom! Retirement and I just never planned for it, it has arrived a bit earlier than I expected and whilst I had an exit plan for the business, it didn't include retirement planning as such.
Life is very strange at the moment for sure as I come to terms with stuff I hadn't realised was there and what to do with myself. I've a list of chores a mile long but the weather has been oppressive and not conducive to the list of house maintenance projects.
With a head full of negative thoughts, death, getting old and all sorts of destructive thoughts going on I am struggling to hold it all together but not all the time. Yesterday was a chaos day and in between we went out to lunch (interrupted by a late delivery I had to rush back for) and I felt OK when we got back from that - I' interacted with people and so that was good. Anyway there you have it. I am away at the weekend up to see my mum, daughter, son-in-law and the grand-kids which will be great as my mum gets to see her great grandchildren. I hope that will lift my spirits.
Having said that seeing my mum approaching her 90th year takes a toll on me as she slows down and needs time to get anywhere.
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