Getting Out Of The House

I had not figured on it but this weekend I am on my own again and so it was interesting that last night I decided I'd take myself off to the pub for a beer.  The locals were a bit rowdy so I had a few beers in one and then a beer in another pub before heading off home through the graveyard - torch in hand - spooky :-)  It is the quickest way home and quite a nice walk really.

I sat and watched the Grand Prix qualifying and watched some background stuff before taking myself off home.  I found out what was wrong with my PC - I should have guessed that I'd filled up the storage doing all this work and that was causing it to behave badly.  i've cleared down  a lot of space now and it is a lot better.  More house keeping to do though to make it run better.

I went out today - just went shopping - I seized a break in the rain to go and recycle all our glass and do some shopping.  It was quite busy which surprised me.  But hey ho....  It was nice to get out and do a little shopping for vegetables and eggs which I've done without for most of this week.  It has had the desired effect as I am losing weight and the trousers and belt I bought last week are an inch too big already.  Mind you I just need to watch out for the beer consumption which will throw weight back onto your middle in a blink.

It was nice to get out and I don't get all het up like I used to when waiting to be served or that people in the queue take a long time to pack.  It's all part of the way it is.  I can't change it so I might as well enjoy it and talk to whoever is on the tills.  A couple of nice smiles and pleasantries is all it takes.  Whilst it is a pain to go shopping it needs to be done so I just enjoy it.  It sure is nice to see my fridge full up with vegetables :-) 

I'm happy but do find living here on my own sometimes a bit quiet and a bit lonely but that isn't going to last for long (I hope) and I can entertain myself and do pretty much what I want so it is just a matter of getting used to it, making up the rules as you go along and enjoying it.

The Weekend Arrives

I'm in two minds about weekends - I ought to get out more but somehow I am trying to avoid the gravitation towards the pub.   I feel I've lost 3 or 4 pounds in a week and most of that is by a serious protein fest, no carbs or very few and I can feel that my trousers, snug last Friday are actually loose now.  I will try on my suit tomorrow as we are off to a Masonic meeting and the last time I went about three weeks ago it was "snug" to say the least.  I have a feeling that I've lost enough to make it comfortable. We will see.

I have turned off both work PCs leaving just this one on.  It is playing up as I've added a second screen to it and also Chrome is misbehaving itself again.  Damn technology!

Well I'd better go get to bed and get ready for tomorrow - looking forward to being an honoured guest once more and getting a nice lunch and a beer or three as I've been a reasonably good boy all week.

OUCH - How Much? Good Grief!

My web site is double what I was expecting to pay for it and I can hardly believe the costs but I've been assured that the reason is that I need to make it work across all platforms and tablets and smartphones are prevalent these days.

Sheeesh.  It is a bit more than I bargained for but I suppose I'll have to go with it.  I have a few days to think about it and then I need to bite the bullet and do it.  I have two others quoting but I know the guy who will do my site and he did all my logos etc.  I've known him a long time and trust him so there's a bit of that in my decision process too.

I suppose it just means I need to bring in more customers to cover the costs.  Anyway, the main thing is that it needs to be done and sooner rather than later. So it's a "bite the bullet" situation once again and hopefully that will be the end of the big spend.  I reckon that I should have taken my own advice and doubled my initial estimates for the investment required.

No More Jazz Nights :-(

Pretty sad state of affairs.  I've been going since 1988 to the Jazz Nights on the 1st Wednesday in the month.  That's 26 years.  It just wasn't getting the support anymore and I'm not surprised as there aren't many of the old timers left that used to frequent the place.

All good things come to an end of course and this is just one of those things and it fits in nicely as the person I usually go with doesn't know I've moved or that I've left Mrs. F. and so it is sort of useful.

It was nice to see my daughter A today for lunch it was OK a little uncomfortable but OK.  It must be difficult for her as it is for me getting used to the new order of things but she went with her mum to Lisbon so they appeared to have had a good time.  I am so pleased about that.  I really really want Mrs. F. to be a friend in the future. It's not as if we've rowed or thrown stuff at each other we just drifted apart and I'd hate for her to be sad - there's no reason to wish her ill  at all.

I've just sent off the web site stuff to my designer, hopefully he will come back with a half decent price for getting my web site off the ground.  Almost there - just need to now concentrate on getting some customers.

FInally A Coffee

A late afternoon coffee and it is day three so all is fine but for some reason my blood pressure is way up on last week's normal readings?  Not sure but I'm going to keep my eye on that it shouldn't be that high at all.  If it is stupid for a long time I will have to get myself checked out.  The coffee doesn't appear to have done much difference really, nominal.

I've spent the day sorting the words for my web site and all my service offerings out.  Almost there now I think just a few more tweaks, tidy the documents up and then send out to my man and a few other suppliers.

I hope it won't cost me too much - hopefully as the heavy work is done and I've written all the copy it should be a straightforward case of a design and then to inject the words and photos.  

That's the plan anyway.

My diet is beginning to kick in and I can taste the "Atkin's breath" as I've gone almost fully onto a protein only diet at the moment to kick start the process of losing some more weight. I feel that I've lost a few pounds in the last week as my belt that I bought last Friday isn't holding my trousers up :-) so I've gone from XXL to XL in a few days which is interesting.  Mind you I need to get back to losing weight regularly and as it is coming on to summer I will be able to eat lots more salads too.  

I'm very content with my lot at the moment.  My daughter A is coming over tomorrow so she can see the house and we can then go for a spot of lunch for her birthday.  I need to lose a spot of weight but I have new clothes, new outlook, a new business and I'm really looking forward to getting started now.

Two Days No Coffee

Interestingly a very small ache behind my eyes but otherwise no real cravings for caffeine as such.  I'm drinking a lot of water and having tea like Earl Grey and other herbal type infusions.  Why I hear you ask?  Well I want to see if there is any effect on my blood pressure.  It was find last week but on Saturday it was off the scale and the only thing I could put that down to was I'd drunk a lot of coffee - I'd only had one beer on Friday night and a glass of red wine but other than that - I hadn't really had much.

I've also decided that enough is enough and have dropped all carbs from my diet and also reduced my vegetables whilst lifting my fat and protein.  I can already taste/smell the Atkins breath so know that I'm in fat burning mode.  I want to get back to losing some weight and back towards where I was in November last year.  I feel I've lost a couple of pounds already.  My blood pressure is still higher than I'd like and I'm not sure why that should be but I will work on dropping my weight, experimenting with the coffee and also trying to remain away from booze altogether or having as little as possible.

I'm really into the company business at the moment and have spent all day on the documents for the website and for the service descriptions.  It's been a long hard grind as there are some silly little areas I need to tackle and I just haven't had time to do them justice until today.  I just needed a flat out day to do them.

The terms and conditions proved difficult as did the frequently asked questions but I think I've nailed them now.  The difficult part is how much to put on the web site.  I am trying to make it minimalist.  Customers don't actually need to be sold the service - why are they on your site if they haven't already thought about your product or service?  They need a few hooks to bring them in but other than that - it shouldn't be rocket science to work out what I'm doing.  Some of my competitors, to my relief, are so complex and need the customer to do all the work that it must put people off.  Mind you, having said that, they all seem to have work so perhaps it is despite of having a rubbish web site. :-)

I'm going to see how things go this week.  Having lost my trading address is a pain in the arse but I think I may have got a way around it - I just need to think it through and make sure that I'm covered.

I now need to finish off these and get them organised together with the specification and get them sent off to my web developer.  Hopefully he can get it produced for a reasonable amount of money and I can set too making a go of it.  It will be good when I get the paperwork done as I can then clear the decks and do the selling and the social media stuff too.

Sunday Clocks Forward Formula One And Here We Go

I need to start the business this week and start to make a move.  I've not been dithering but I am cautious as I want the business to be the best it can prior to starting it but I have to start somewhere and this week is probably as good as any to finish off the web site and get inviting people to start to use my services.  I need to work on a few more documents to finalise everything but I am close now as I have written most of them.  It is always difficult though to press the switch from "test" to "production".

I feel that I should have another lazy Sunday and have already sat down and watched the Formula 1 Grand Prix from Malaysia this morning.  There is Touring Car Racing on this afternoon and it is actually happening a few miles away from me at Brands Hatch - I could have gone I suppose but I had other ideas of what my weekend may have been like.  As it happens that didn't turn out like I expected but no worries there is time and there are other opportunities.  I don't know why I am in such an unholy rush to get into forming relationships and the like.  

So I think that this afternoon I shall sit down and watch the Touring Cars on TV and pour over some of my documents and prepare a short plan of attack for this coming week.  No recurrence of the spotting in my urine so that's good.  I have my urine tester strips so if I'm worried about it I can do the test and see if there is anything to worry about.  My Blood Pressure is a little high which surprises me so this week I am going to go full out on a no carbohydrate approach to my food and also drop caffeine to see if that will help.  I like my coffee so perhaps I shall just have it as a treat once a day rather than living off it like I do at the moment.

Oh A Little Blood Clot

I have to tell you that the one thing you just don't want to see ever is any more blood in your urine but I was told that there is a possibility from the scope a few weeks ago and sure enough there was a tiny little clot when I went a few minutes ago.  You tend to keep a very close eye on your urine stream and a small spot flew out and hit the porcelain.  When I checked it with a little toilet tissue it was indeed a very small clot of blood. 

Having had a flexible cystoscopy a few weeks ago it is a possible side effect but even so I'll be keeping my eye on things closely and if it persists I'll be straight back but as I said it is a known side effect.  Of course it puts you on edge as the whole episode comes flooding back and it reminds you of all that happened to you in the past.  Grim indeed.  Oh well - monitoring the situation for a few weeks is in order.

Well That Was A Good Night

I had a good time and ingratiated myself with young P and had a dance and a laugh and joke but as I managed to say to her, I've only yelled at you over the music so it would be nice to meet somewhere quiet and have a normal conversation :-)  

The only problem I did have was trying to get to talk to her alone it was a nightmare as she was closely accompanied by a few people one of whom was interestingly in a similar industry to myself and I couldn't shake him off :-) Oh well - there's time and opportunity ahead I hope and there will be some other concerts and bands playing I have no doubt.

Anyway, she's very nice and a little eccentric so right up my street in terms of those I hang out with.  S was also on great form - she is the promoter of these events and that reminds me I need to discuss this with someone I know as it may be an opportunity to bring some bands to a venue that I know.

But I had a lovely night the bands were great,  I drank water most of the night and so that was good was also pleasantly surprised as I asked for a Soda water (carbonated water) in a pub (I was early and driving) and there was no charge!  Not many things you can get for nothing these days.  

I wore my red and blue shirt which is great but surprisingly snug especially around the arms.  It appears that must be the way they make them these days for the other shirts are also quite grippy. Perhaps after the first wash it will loosen a little - it wasn't uncomfortable but I suppose I'm used to wearing baggy stuff most of the time.

I had a great day yesterday and today the sun is shining and all is OK with the world.  My new equipment mount has arrived form my scanner which I got at a bit of a bargain price and I'm just reading how to use it - it is for really difficult film especially if it is curled like a lot of the film I have is.  It allows me to scan even the most difficult stuff. 

Clothes Maketh The Man

I met the lovely L in Bromley and she took me shopping and taught me where best to go.  I actually came back £147.50 lighter.  For that I got:

Three shirts, A shirt combo Tee Shirt, A Jacket, 5 Polo Shirts, A Brown Belt and Pair of Black Jeans... I'm rather pleased as these all move away from my usual style of clothing which is pretty plain and I really like the whole lot - I could have spent a lot more but these will do for now and I now have problems selecting what to wear.  I'm sure it will all fall into place as I will be wearing my blue soled brogues so it will all have to match in nicely :-)  

Shopping Tomorrow

This will be exciting my friend L is taking me out to get me some decent clothes :-) what fun!  Having disposed of my old, out of date, faded, hole ridden and unworn stuff earlier this week it is now time to replace those with a few decent outfits.  It will be good as I am going out tomorrow night to a gig and fancy making a bit of a statement whilst I'm about it :-)

So I'm off on the train to learn all about clothes shopping - I must remember to get her some flowers or some chocolates as a thank you.  I have already said I'm buying lunch.  So that will be good too.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow it should be a good day and I can have some clothes to go with my mood.  I saw some nice things early today when we popped into the local town and had a look at one of the Tailor shops closing down.  I managed to source a Bow Tie as my other one had disintegrated :-(

I should be working on the web site tomorrow but so what it will wait a little while longer and Flocky, bless him, is proof reading some of the words which is a great help.  ALmost there - almost there.  I have all the equipment and know what I'm doing now and soon I can just start selling it and making noise.  

However, there is one fly in the Ointment and that is that the guy who was giving me his address to use has had a stroke and is now thinking of getting rid of his business.  It's a bit of a nightmare for me logistically I have to go and start again with a trading address - it's a pain but not a lot I can do about it really.  I will have to see if someone else can give me a delivery address in the interim.  

DIet & Cancer

Steve over at Got Bladder Cancer? HERE asks an important question I feel:

"How many of you All Clear folks have made diet, exercise, and/or supplement changes to stave off the bladder cancer? Since there is no study being conducted, you readers are my only data source beyond myself."

Well it's interesting because I'm pretty much convinced now that the diet I am following is doing good things for me.  It's a part Paleo part Low Carbohydrate High Fat regime.  My only downfall has been since the move I have been out a lot and been drinkin beer which has swollen my waistline by an inch or so.  That's coming off and it has already started this week.

Why do I think this?  Well I am fit and healthy I haven't had a cold in years now and my teeth no longer need fixing by the Dentist since I've been on this diet.  The key things are that I feel great, I feel like I don't have to eat, I'm satiated.  I feel more alive than I've done for years and years and I'm in reasonable but not great shape.  I can easily now do push ups and go on my X-Trainer for 30 minutes.  My Blood Pressure has been dropping and the other day was a nice 120 over 80 which is fab.  I now need to work on keeping it that low all the time.  Slowly slowly I'll get there.

I no longer touch man made carbohydrates, sugar, rice, pasta, bread, marjorine etc.  I tend to cook my food fresh and not rely on any shop bought ready meals or preprepared food stuffs.

I had a few false starts about what I should and shouldn't be eating.  So far on this diet but it is actually a lifestyle, I've lost 3 and a half stone.  I feel I can lose another 1 or 2 stone this year too.  I feel and look healthier than I've done for years, I'm more active too.

Difficult to say whether it is keeping Cancer at bay but I'd probably say that it is doing good things as the diet is all about protein which the body needs to repair itself.  Dropping the carbs means I'm not putting on weight and certainly not spiking my Insulin which is another good thing.

Steve asks about exercise - well I used to do quite a bit.  With the move the exercise machines have come with me and I can almost reach them past the boxes now so I will go and get back into the habit soon.  I can't say I enjoyed that part of feeling fit but I find that it does help me and of course you can burn off those excess fatty bits that much quicker.

All in all, I changed my lifestyle almost straight away and whilst I made a few wild and dangerous detours earlier on I find this is the best diet I've ever followed and I find it easy to stick to, I don't feel hungry and I feel great most of the time.  

Even More Productiver

I managed to rip into doing some slide scanning and then timed myself and seemed to do pretty well - a little slower than I would have liked but even so I would have made a bit of money today :-) 

I was also writing up the web site and making that happen.  It's nearly there now, coming together nicely.  It takes a lot to be brave and leave most of the words I wrote a month or two ago out altogether but I want the site to just provide the bare bones I doubt anyone is that interested in reading War & Peace just to get their photographs scanned.

Off in an hour or so for a meal - our twice a year Officers' Mess.  I'm driving so need to stay on the Soda water tonight.  That will be OK though as I want to get cracking on the web site tomorrow and hopefully have that ready by the end of the week.  I feel the need to launch the business about now (which is what I had in mind).  

Funny old day it was meant to be a bit showery but I missed seeing the showers coming and now it is bucketing it down and all my washing is out on the line :-) Oh well - it doesn't matter at all it can come in when it does get dry.  :-) 

I like the new me, I just laugh and smile about things like that where before I'd have been in a bit of a rage about it.. I am so pleased that I don't get all flustered and hung up anymore - well very rarely - if I do - I know what is going on and can stop myself pretty quickly I find.  Life's good - I'm enjoying things now.

Productive Day Mainly - At Last

It takes time to get settled in and we still have boxes all over the place that need to get put away.  I'm just waiting for Flocky to do some more adjustments to the attic and I can get rid of all the odds and ends.  My bedroom is finally neat and tidy - or quite tidy now as I've cleared out all my old clothes and stuff.

I've been working away today on my negative scanning skills and amusing friends and family sticking the results on Facebook!  I've gone way over the 1,000 scans now and there's still loads more to do.  I also won an auction on eBay for a specialist wet and dry film scanner that will allow me to trap bent and curled photos between glass to get a better scan.  I also bought a few more templates to allow me to do other film types which I also intend to work out how to implement and price!  Loads of work done today and a little more to come in the next few days as I finally tackle the web site and the price lists etc.  It's coming together OK but a little less organised than I'm used to.

The New Me

Is a strange beast.  I have just bought a pair of shoes that are way over the top for me - twice!  I know what can I say...  I have a pair of booted Oxford Brogue shoes in brown and a pair of Suede light brown shoes with bright blue soles!  What am I like?  

It's the new me - expressive, artistic - like I used to be - ME - that's the whole point.  Out go my old clothes tomorrow and with it part of my old life.  L is going to meet up with me for a shopping spree and I'll get myself some nice Tee Shirts, Shirts and Trousers and have a new wardrobe.  It's all about expressing who I am and what I am about.  It's the release and the hidden me.  I've not expressed myself for years and years.  I've not been the real me and whilst I do realise that I am doing things a little excessively at the moment - it's all about extremes - I know that I am heading in a direction that will ultimately lead to a new and more fulfilling life.

Hell I'm enjoying myself at the moment, it feels sinful because I was never really allowed to let go and enjoy things ever.

The one thing I don't do that I probably ought to is arrange events.  It is always my friends who call up me and they arrange.  Maybe I ought to sort something out in the near future?

I am so looking forward to going out on Friday and meeting P and S again.   It's just brilliant to go out and just have a good time.  Surely what it is all about?  Answers on a Postcard...

Confidence

If you knew me when I was at work you'd know that I was fully self assured and self confident - top of my game I always felt and whilst I may have come across as arrogant the thing was that's the way my personality type (INTJ) naturally is.  That is when I was at work.  I'm a very different person and very rarely will I say the first word or start a conversation.  I might smile at people and acknowledge them but it isn't usual.  

I tend to rely on the other party to start things off.  Of course the proviso is "unless I know you" or I know someone you know then it is quite legitimate to go chat to someone as I did on Saturday night and I'm really quite pleased I did because enough people have told me that I'm pretty engaging sort of chap and I have a good listening skills as well these days - I no longer need to be the one doing the talking.  It worked great on Saturday night and I'm feeling good because one of the biggest worries was to make some friends locally and to build a new circle of friends.  So far that seems to be going quite well and I am feeling great because it isn't as difficult as I thought it was going to be and people are friendly and you only have to ask.

I was having a lovely but rather loud shouting chat with this young lady P on Saturday and hopefully I'm seeing her on Friday as well so that will be nice - perhaps we can have a chat at a slightly lower level even though it will be at another gig.  

But again, I'm getting out, building a new life, it's exciting and enjoyable.  Surely that's the thing - get out there and enjoy my life a bit more.

I'll Take That Any Day

I do find that a relaxing Sunday is a nice thing to do.  Today I couldn't get the lawn sorted or the debris cleaned away from the storms of 6 weeks ago.  The ground is still soggy and so it will just have to wait until things are better.

I've had a lazy old day today and getting myself ready for the onslaught this week - I must get on and do some serious work on the web site and also the price lists.  It is all in my head and now needs to be committed to paper so it can be developed.  

I sure hope that I can start to secure some work but really want the web site up and running as well.  I also have a final set of tweaks on the discount structure to put together.  In some ways I'm not too keen on discounting too much as I have a pretty keen price now but know I have to do something.  It's proving a little more difficult to work it out so it is consistent.

Anyway - a quiet day and one where I just relaxed and enjoyed myself.  I'm really looking forward to Friday night and going out and meeting P again and having a chat with her without - I hope - too much noise.  

Things Happen To Me

Friday night my mate calls and we go to Town - in this case Town is Sevenoaks - it's rather nice and we bump into an old friend of ours S.  She is a promoter of bands and works at the local theatre too.  It's interesting what happens now.  I asked her whether she knew if anything was going on in the village on Saturday night as I was at a loose end.  Indeed she does and whilst she ran me home - she lives around the corner from me - she suggests that she calls me and we go over and see one of her bands playing.

I was just getting ready when the doorbell went and off we went to the pub and her band were just setting up.  We were right at the front so my ears are buzzing somewhat this morning.  But blow me, I met this girl last week at the other gig and lo and behold, it turns out she is S's best friend!  Doh.  So we had an interesting evening chatting about this and that and we are meeting up this Friday for another gig.  It appears she likes live music too so let's see what happens.

It must be me, or the new me these days but life is really great and I am enjoying the whole thing and last night at this gig was no exception.  I had a lovely time with S & P and a few beers and a good laugh and a chat in between songs.

I like it here.  Things happen to me and it all happens for a reason.....

Seize The Day

Well that wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be.  It was rather Cathartic as it happens to go through and throw out my past....  Some ties in my collection are 25 years old and one is 30 years old.  It's time they went - they are unlikely to get worn again.  I've kept my formal ties and bits.  I have some more of my formal wear still at the old house which I need to go and get.  I have bow ties and the like there and my patent shoes.

So I've been utterly ruthless with things - I've thrown out my trousers, shirts, sweatshirts and tee shirts.  Anything that looked old, anything that hasn't been worn in 6 months isn't likely too so that was binned as well.

So here's the pile I chucked out - it's about a 2/3rds of my wardrobe I guess

My Clothes tidy is looking very tidy and also rather bare - enough clothes for 10 to 14 days at the most now where I could have lived for 6 weeks before I reckon.

The suitcases now on top of the wardrobe and all my formal wear to the right and my nice shirts to the left.  A box of odds and sods and that's it about done.

All bagged up ready to go to the local Clothes recycling bank.... 

Yes I do need to buy some clothes but do yo know what?  I don't need that many as I can wander around in jeans and tee shirts most of the time and I really need some nice casual clothes to go out with.  Hopefully my friend is going to take me out to do some shopping - she's got a good eye and so hopefully I can get myself a small wardrobe of new things.  I certainly realise that I don't need a lot.  All my old office stuff has all gone which was the bulk of it and I certainly won't be needing that again in a hurry.  

First Day Of Spring

So that's Spring Cleaning and for me, chucking out all my old clothes that I am never, realistically, going to wear.  I've been told by a friend to be ruthless.  I have a couple of suitcases full of clothes that I haven't used since I've been here.  I have lots of formal wear stuff that I am unlikely to use.  

There's a storage rail downstairs that I might be able to use to put my Evening Suits and the like and I've a chest of drawers available to me as well for some storage.  Interesting.  So let the games commence.  I will then probably just wander over to the clothes bank and drop these in - some may be useful to someone.  Any good stuff can go to the charity shop.  I have lots of work shirts and ties even that I am unlikely ever to need again.  They too can hit the rubbish.

It is going to be painful but it has to be done for a couple of reasons.  One is to reduce the clutter, two is to throw away the past. Three is to throw away stuff I just no longer wear or would want to wear and four is so that I can make room to buy some new clothes to mark my independence.  I've already bought some great shoes and jeans and later today my new casual shoes will arrive, I have new trainers too.  It's all coming together.