Getting to see the Doctor

I haven't been ill for 30 years. I saw my Doctor when I signed up to his surgery in 1981 and in 1998 for an insurance check up! Other than that - we don't meet.

I don't like Doctors or Hospitals at all - I have a sort of White Coat syndrome - my blood pressure goes through the roof and I get very very nervous. So it was on the day I had to see the Doctor that I walked down the hill from my house across the main road and arrived far too early for my appointment.

I didn't particularly want to sit in reception and so I did a stupid thing - I Went in to the newsagents next door to the surgery and instead of buying some mints or some other such distraction bought a packet of cigars and a box of matches! Later you'll see why this was pretty ironic!

Having given up ages and ages ago, I lit up and nearly passed out on the first cigar, wandered around and managed to smoke a couple more before getting the nerve to go to the Doctors.

He immediately noted down that I was a smoker even though I told him I'd just bought the packet to get me through the door! I can't say that it was a good experience - I took a urine sample which was duly processed, he told me what he thought it could be - a Tumour at worst and maybe something else, then told me that I'd have to have a cystoscopy (under general anaesthetic) to check it out.

I'm afraid that all he did was to upset me a lot. I was in pieces by the time I got home and locked myself in my office and cried and moped around and then went up the pub, bought some more cigars and generally did a lot of negative thinking.

So - Doctor didn't really put me at ease, marked me down as as a smoker even though I'd only had a few that morning, nigh on told me I had a tumour and that he would get the Hospital to get me an appointment.

At this point I was pretty low I have to say. I didn't know what I had, I was bleeding all the time, I was drinking water as if it was going out of fashion and I knew I'd have to have a pipe rammed up my Penis to check out my bladder. Yep, I felt bad.

My wife was very good and I managed to have a reasonably good week. Work were brilliant as I had only just started there. I had to work from home which - thank goodness is practical with a phone and a PC. Let me never knock IT again as I have managed to work during this time. On occassions I'd just have to go and have a blurt in my office with my door locked behind me.

After a week a few days I got the letter from the Hospital - see the next blog for that!!