How's Your Head?

 My head is whirring at the moment and computing away like no one's business.  It does that a lot, it's part of me and I am used to it but it can be both a blessing and a curse.

At present my mind is computing any possibility that the guy who abandoned the business and cut off all channels to talk to him and completely withdrew with a series of threats to add good measure might reappear now that things are about to go live.  It's been a year or a half a year if you consider his legal (not legal) letter.  So hold on, you've done what he wanted, demonstrated that is what he said and that is surely that?  Well, I'd like to think so but I am certain that he needs one more throw of the dice.  If you've ever been at a venue where a drunk rightly gets thrown out you can almost bet that he will come back for a second rant as the anger in him rises.  If I see such behaviour I normally find another exit and go, it's not worth being in the firing line if he does come back.  Walk in the opposite direction even if it takes you away from your desired destination.  Spider senses take over and survival trumps leaving a half drunk beer.

So what am I worried about?  Well it's because people are likely to become irrational when they get all angry and resentful and so when I received the legal (not legal) letter I was pretty horrified that it had escalated on his side to be my fault.  It was pretty much a fabrication and a complete distortion of the truth of the matter and was written in such a way as I knew it was not his idea or him behind it.  Some worm-tongue had constructed a vile attack piece on me and it had the desired effect that these letters do and I was pretty upset about the contents.  I dislike being called a liar, or having my professional reputation called into disrepute.

Of course, when you delve deeper and then see the gaping holes in the argument the hypocrisy and double speak plus the inaccuracies it appears, as it was some desperate attempt to make me do something irrational in response.  Luckily having dealt with sh1t like this for years and years and once I calmed down a bit, I was able to respond with a few facts backed up with documentation and whilst I have had a toned down reply I have not felt it worthy of a response, it is beneath contempt and not worthy of me spending time engaging in something that is, as far as I am concerned done and dusted, over, closed and in full compliance with his wishes.

So why now are the grey cells skipping, jumping and firing off?  I think that as the time nears for the business to commence trading, the chances will be that the red mist will once again take over and the little green genie of jealousy will attempt some other action.  So I am computing all of the stuff once again that I have already done and testing my own biases (because we all have them) and making sure I know where I am just in case.

If you know me, you'll recognize this behaviour and some have warned me about it and forced me to stop albeit that was due to me reflecting on the past and frankly beating myself up about stuff that had already happened, that could not be changed and was in the past and no matter what, that cannot affect the now at all.  So I don't do that anymore but occasionally the past haunts me but only for a short while until I put it back in check.  

I may be worrying about nothing but it is always as well to be prepared.  I fully expect the kickback but the argument was lost a year ago and the only issue now is whether we get the drunk bully coming at me or something equally squalid, vile, hateful and wanting to harm me.