Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Sh1t Timing

I have to say that I have sh1t timing and I was a bit lax here.  I recognised that there was some problems happening especially in terms of "empty nest syndrome" and somehow (maybe consciously) it was left as a search string in the PC Browser.  So Mrs. F. cornered me as I got back from the pub.  Now as I said at the time of being so cornered - it isn't a great time to talk to me after I've got a few beers down my neck and I'd been laughing and joking with the lads but we had some discussions (shall we say).

It wasn't pleasant but then again I didn't expect it to be but it was a little more unpleasant than I really wanted it to be or needed it to be.  In fact it got a bit ugly but then I suppose it was time I said something but I really didn't want to be talking with a few beers down the neck although, on reflection, at least I said it as it was.

Of course, now I've upset things and have been trying to smooth it all over but it's all about money, who does what at home and all that old tosh.  Frankly, it wasn't a fair contest and so I stopped it and we need to talk later but at last and at least we are going to talk and I've been wanting to do that for years.

Finally we agree that we don't like each other's choice of music, TV, friends and many other things and that's a huge amount of progress.

Let's see what the rest of the week brings.  I feel an absolute bastard for bringing it up but it needs to be said and the conversation needs to be had.  I'm worried about the future and Mrs. F. isn't looking past the next pay packet, we are so off base it isn't true.  Let's now hope we can work this out at last.

I was surprised I said some of the things I did tonight but I was pretty explicit about my life expectancy and the short time I felt I had left.  Mrs. F. is worried about things that aren't even remotely likely to happen unless she wishes hard enough for them to.   

At least it is out in the open and at least we know where we stand.  I just think that she has held on to too much for too long and thinks it is all her fault when, in reality I think it is mainly my problems we need to tackle.  Let's see where it goes from here.  It isn't a good night but it is progress and that's what I need now.

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