And So It Begins

I was interested to read an article recently in the Daily Mail (OK it raises your blood pressure and isn't really news at all).  I've managed to wean my mum off reading it because it is a stream of bad news and over hyped news threads that are there, after all, to sell newspapers and to play on the pain body of people.  

The article says a fair bit about emasculation and I have to say I related to it because over the years that's how I've felt it has been.  Regular readers will remember where things that need to be done in the house need to be done NOW.  If I don't drop what I'm doing it gets attempted to be done as if I'm at fault.  Today is an interesting point.  I normally do a fair amount of the preparation for Christmas Day on Christmas Eve.  I especially do the Gammon, my speciality.  Not today - that's being done now by Mrs. F and the children.  Preparing the Veg.  No that's also been done. So that's all my usual jobs gone for today.  Heaven alone knows if I will get a look in tomorrow to do the meal itself.  I imagine I will but we will see.  

I'm now keeping out of the way as it is just too difficult and I've been ignored twice already - not sure if she's deaf or just being obtuse.  As I said to Flocky - I've only got to endure this for this year.  I have no idea what I will do next year and does it matter?  Probably not.  It's going to be a rough few days I know but I can ride this out, I've ridden out bad storms before and I know that once this is over, I can be on my way and it's behind me then.

I like the idea of drawing the line (previous posting) and then moving on from there.  I wonder whether I will just spring clean my friends and contacts and start anew?  It is very tempting to just sever all ties with many of them and just forget about them and move on.  It clears away cobwebs and history, it removes temptation and allows me some freedom to move on and upwards.

I find the thing that I will miss the most about not being here in the Village is the opportunity to go for my walks and silly things like heading to the Curry House or the local Pub, the Post Office and those familiar places and faces.  It is the place I've lived longest having lived here twice.  It feels like home in many ways.  I may well be able to move back this way or around here somewhere.  Time will tell.

So - it is interesting that Mrs. F. is keeping herself very busy at the moment - her way of dealing with it and at the same time, I don't think it is deliberate, I'm edged out of all my usual duties.  Just like I was on everything else I used to do.  It's been a gradual erosion of my position since the kids were born I think.  It's been coming for years and years and like most blokes, I do anything to keep the peace and in fact added to the downfall.  I see that I've just been one to go with the flow but that's led me here.  Oh well hindsight is a wonderful thing, it felt at the time I was doing the right thing.

I need to be on my guard today not to hit the booze too - it is very easy when we go to the party to drink especially if I am being ignored or isolated which I have no doubt will happen as Mrs. F. will seek out and be in the kitchen with the other ladies.  Maybe the lads will spend a bit of time with me - not holding my breath though.  

As I said earlier, this time next year this will all be over and I'll be doing something else I guess.  It doesn't matter what that something is as long as I'm happier then than I am now (not difficult).  Looking forward to 2014 and to say goodbye to 2013 a year of so many emotions, contrasts and of such change.  It's had absolutely everything.