Thursday, November 07, 2013

News Travels In Ripples

Was at a Lodge meeting and my friend was talking a little too loudly and so another friend who had sort of latched onto what was going on twigged and so had to tell him too.  Mrs. F. is doing herself no favours really.  I know her father quite well and my nephew too and in some ways meet them more than she does and she hasn't told them what is happening it is so bizarre and so wrong but what can I do?

What concerns me is that the rumour mill will hit them before Mrs. F has spoken to them. In fact I may well have moved out before she tells her folks.  That's not right but the trouble is that I'm happy to let people know - it is what is happening after all and just trying to hide the truth will eventually backfire (IMHO).

Mrs. F is off to her friend in Hastings on Friday - I'm pleased as she is a rational person and stable and I think they went through a "crisis" and ended up taking on a B& B at this Sussex Coast town.  I tried to float this last year (you may recall) it was now, I think, a last throw of the dice I had available to me.  A way of involving both of us in a business and then a lifestyle and an opportunity to be in the country, near the sea etc.  

I see that as my last real attempt to get the two of us to become "Us" and not "me" and "I".  That's the real thing and the bit that now friends tell me was the missing ingredient.  There was always me and I and her and him but no us or we in my relationship.

It was also interesting to talk to my friend about his relationship that also has the problem I had which was that indoors and at home were far more interesting to Mrs. F. or my friend's wife than actually getting out there and experiencing life!  Going to Monza last year was for me a massive turning point - not Monza itself but the whole thing - the travel, the car hire, the Hotels, the restaurants and the GP itself. You can't do that sat at home on a Saturday night with a can of beer and a pack of crisps - you in one room and Mrs. F. in the other.

I have a big meeting this Saturday and it seems to me that there is a problem.  A number of people know my situation and a number don't. My Father-In-Law and my Nephew will both be there and I just hope that the "information" does not arrive second hand to either of them.  My Father-In-Law is in his 90s and I really don't want that to arrive from anyone other than Mrs. F. or perhaps me.  

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