"Hello, I've been told to call you to book a CT scan." "Ermm, do you have a form?" "Why yes I do." "Well, we are meant to have the form" "I see"
So I have decided that the very best thing I can do is actually go to the Radiology department tomorrow and take my diary and book this up. I can also chat to someone (and maybe see the Scanner). "They" (whoever they may be) say that if you are claustrophobic that it can be difficult, well maybe they'll let me have a peek and see it - I'm sure it should be OK, I've been inside a large X-Ray thing before so perhaps it is like that? Anyhow, at least they sounded OK about me turning up to make the appointment and also that I'm over 42 (I think) which means that I'm OK to have the scan without some sort of assessment being made.
Maybe whilst I am out I can pop into the shops and get some food for my diet. I'm being a bit demanding on what I'm able to eat so I can perhaps do a bit of shopping myself and so make the main shop a bit less arduous. The Supermarket is right next door to the Hospital so it shouldn't be a problem and a bit of exercise will go down well after breakfast.
Monday, March 19, 2012
Very Quick
Traumatic but very quickly my friend died and it was a sad evening. I feel sorry for my friend who I go to the Jazz night with as this is both of his friends in a very short space of time :-( Parkinson's and now this Pancreatic and complications (Gall and Liver problems). It has been pretty quick I guess 2 weeks start to finish and I only saw him myself about 6 or 8 weeks ago I suppose. I only meet him 8 or 10 times a year but have done that regularly over 10 or more years I suppose.
So a sad day really but here's something interesting at the same time another friend of mine was posting that he had a 220 mile round trip to come to Bromley tonight. As things happened one of the Brethren stopped breathing and this chap stepped in and got his heart beating again sufficiently to get help there and that's just amazing so now he knows why he made the round trip - he did that to save a life. Fantastic job.
So a sad day really but here's something interesting at the same time another friend of mine was posting that he had a 220 mile round trip to come to Bromley tonight. As things happened one of the Brethren stopped breathing and this chap stepped in and got his heart beating again sufficiently to get help there and that's just amazing so now he knows why he made the round trip - he did that to save a life. Fantastic job.
Dad
Well dad is stable I guess you'd call it. He surprises me my being still very cheerful although he has his days - don't we all. He is still hanging on in there but quite weak and needs to take his time and get his breath and that's the thing - his mind isn't going but his body is and he knows it. I just heard that a friend of mine was diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer whilst I was away he is in hospital and not so good. In and out of conciousness and not likely to last too long. It is a shame as he and I were only talking about Dad in January (or was it February) and he was complaining about a few minor ailments and bang, that's arrived and within weeks he is seriously ill.
In some ways I'm surprised my dad has made it this far, he wasn't expected to at all although his prognosis of 6 months to 4 years gives plenty of room for the health specialists. I'm planning to go up soon to see the folks, I ring everyday really just to make sure mum has somewhere to off load what she is going through. My brother isn't "good" at that sort of listening regime. I'm a lot better at hearing the words that he doesn't want to hear. I think that there's a lot to be said for looking after the carer a little more, they have to be there all the time and live with the consequences.
Anyway, he's as well as can be and still doing well despite what is actually happening to him.
In some ways I'm surprised my dad has made it this far, he wasn't expected to at all although his prognosis of 6 months to 4 years gives plenty of room for the health specialists. I'm planning to go up soon to see the folks, I ring everyday really just to make sure mum has somewhere to off load what she is going through. My brother isn't "good" at that sort of listening regime. I'm a lot better at hearing the words that he doesn't want to hear. I think that there's a lot to be said for looking after the carer a little more, they have to be there all the time and live with the consequences.
Anyway, he's as well as can be and still doing well despite what is actually happening to him.
New Week New Outlook
I've been in a funny old place since being diagnosed with Bladder Cancer way way back in July 2006. It really has completely thrown my life into a different place and all that period up until diagnosis of sacrifice at the altar of capitalism changed in a very swift way. The funniest thing was that I thought, back then, I had direction something that I'm not absolutely certain I had then or have now. Since diagnosis I've been struggling coming to terms with what it all means, how I've been affected, what I want to do and so on. It's a long old "mid life crisis" and for much of that time I've been trying to weigh it all up. I'm not saying that I've succeeded or that I'm anywhere nearer answering the questions I'm posing myself but that I'm now in a comfortable place with myself.
This morning, for once in a long time, I've sat down at my PC without the anxious drive to do something and by that I mean that I generally sit here and feel guilty if I'm not doing something constructive and yet, today, there is nothing to do - all my actions are done, my work here is finished and I'm waiting for someone to get back to me, a call to arrive and nothing else. The day is my own until something else happens. Close to 2 years work is now over and things will be what they will be, there is a plan and things will happen today and down the week but there is nothing I can physically do to make it happen it is out of my control.
What to do with the time now available? Well some tidying up and getting my desk cleaned up. Throw away all the old rubbish and recycle all the paper around here :-) I've some things to do in terms of sorting out accounts and also I have to update my diary with all my commitments in it. Arrange to go see my folks and generally start to consider what to do next in terms of a job, career or vocation.
Of course, that could be considered defeatist and I suppose in a way if you look at it without my knowledge of the situation it could be. In fact it is proper risk management in action as I can see the possibility of a train wreck in the distance and I'm mitigating it. It would be amusing to get to the end of the journey and find that we can proceed no further and not have a Plan B :-)
It is a beautiful sunny spring day outside and I'm feeling good and positive, I'm losing weight, I feel well and the holiday was the right thing to do to get my head back in the right place and to calm me down and level off the anxiety I was beginning to feel.
I have to also get in touch with my GP and get my BP reading done - maybe next week will be good for that with this amount of weight lost and also the pressures gone. Also need to call to arrange my CT Scan. Anyway, things have slowed right down now and hopefully that will allow me the time to reflect and consider my situation fully. I certainly hope so.
This morning, for once in a long time, I've sat down at my PC without the anxious drive to do something and by that I mean that I generally sit here and feel guilty if I'm not doing something constructive and yet, today, there is nothing to do - all my actions are done, my work here is finished and I'm waiting for someone to get back to me, a call to arrive and nothing else. The day is my own until something else happens. Close to 2 years work is now over and things will be what they will be, there is a plan and things will happen today and down the week but there is nothing I can physically do to make it happen it is out of my control.
What to do with the time now available? Well some tidying up and getting my desk cleaned up. Throw away all the old rubbish and recycle all the paper around here :-) I've some things to do in terms of sorting out accounts and also I have to update my diary with all my commitments in it. Arrange to go see my folks and generally start to consider what to do next in terms of a job, career or vocation.
Of course, that could be considered defeatist and I suppose in a way if you look at it without my knowledge of the situation it could be. In fact it is proper risk management in action as I can see the possibility of a train wreck in the distance and I'm mitigating it. It would be amusing to get to the end of the journey and find that we can proceed no further and not have a Plan B :-)
It is a beautiful sunny spring day outside and I'm feeling good and positive, I'm losing weight, I feel well and the holiday was the right thing to do to get my head back in the right place and to calm me down and level off the anxiety I was beginning to feel.
I have to also get in touch with my GP and get my BP reading done - maybe next week will be good for that with this amount of weight lost and also the pressures gone. Also need to call to arrange my CT Scan. Anyway, things have slowed right down now and hopefully that will allow me the time to reflect and consider my situation fully. I certainly hope so.
Sunday, March 18, 2012
Back on the diet
I'm almost relieved to be back on the diet - I was quite uncomfortable last night with all the eating stuff you like and high carb content etc., but it needs to happen once a week and no doubt I will get my balance of being decadent once a week as time moves on.
I dug out my old egg steamer (poacher) from the back of one of the kitchen cupboards and used that this morning it works well. I'm using up the some of my pre-prepared frozen legumes. Chick Peas this morning and not too many of them as it says they should be used in moderation and so I will make sure I have a good few days gap in between using them again. I have some Avocados that must also be used in moderation, perhaps for lunch? Anyway, I can definitely feel the weight loss and more interestingly things like bending over to tie a shoe or pick something up are now much easier so I'm pleased about that.
I'm once again keeping away from TV and Radio and Internet news so as not to find out the F1 result - the replay show is on at 2pm. It is a bit of a nuisance that F1 has come off terrestrial TV and is now a "paid for" Satellite experience. I'm not sure that for the 40 hours of actual racing I want to pay out £360+ a year. In fact 10 of the races will be on terrestrial so it definitely doesn't make economic sense that would be around £30 a race :-) I think they have the highlights of every race plus the 10 live ones so I'll see how it can be scheduled.
I should have sat down and done some accounts this weekend and actually, frankly, I can't be arsed to do it :-) I know that sounds bad but occasionally you just need to have some "me" time. I'm beginning to consider my future options especially as we haven't had even a nibble from the investment community. People outside of that community cannot understand how our idea cannot be given some level of investment.
We are aware (and always were) that this was a possible outcome and have planned for it. The next step will be to approach Corporate companies who have money available and will venture with us. That changes the game a bit for us. In fact it changes it a lot but if that doesn't happen and we cannot Joint Venture either then we are sort of clutching at straws and will need to take a deep breath and close the business down. It will be a shame of course but that's what happens and great ideas and clever innovation do not always get recognised and realised. We would have done what we needed to bring the idea to life and have it investor ready. We might be able to "sell" the work we have done and the company name etc., to recover some costs but that's not immediately likely.
So I'm doing some thinking about what I'd like to do next if things don't work out the way I would like them to. There's plenty of things and opportunities out there and I could probably pursue a dream or perhaps change career or do something completely "out there" :-) I just need a lazy Sunday like today to do that....
I dug out my old egg steamer (poacher) from the back of one of the kitchen cupboards and used that this morning it works well. I'm using up the some of my pre-prepared frozen legumes. Chick Peas this morning and not too many of them as it says they should be used in moderation and so I will make sure I have a good few days gap in between using them again. I have some Avocados that must also be used in moderation, perhaps for lunch? Anyway, I can definitely feel the weight loss and more interestingly things like bending over to tie a shoe or pick something up are now much easier so I'm pleased about that.
I'm once again keeping away from TV and Radio and Internet news so as not to find out the F1 result - the replay show is on at 2pm. It is a bit of a nuisance that F1 has come off terrestrial TV and is now a "paid for" Satellite experience. I'm not sure that for the 40 hours of actual racing I want to pay out £360+ a year. In fact 10 of the races will be on terrestrial so it definitely doesn't make economic sense that would be around £30 a race :-) I think they have the highlights of every race plus the 10 live ones so I'll see how it can be scheduled.
I should have sat down and done some accounts this weekend and actually, frankly, I can't be arsed to do it :-) I know that sounds bad but occasionally you just need to have some "me" time. I'm beginning to consider my future options especially as we haven't had even a nibble from the investment community. People outside of that community cannot understand how our idea cannot be given some level of investment.
We are aware (and always were) that this was a possible outcome and have planned for it. The next step will be to approach Corporate companies who have money available and will venture with us. That changes the game a bit for us. In fact it changes it a lot but if that doesn't happen and we cannot Joint Venture either then we are sort of clutching at straws and will need to take a deep breath and close the business down. It will be a shame of course but that's what happens and great ideas and clever innovation do not always get recognised and realised. We would have done what we needed to bring the idea to life and have it investor ready. We might be able to "sell" the work we have done and the company name etc., to recover some costs but that's not immediately likely.
So I'm doing some thinking about what I'd like to do next if things don't work out the way I would like them to. There's plenty of things and opportunities out there and I could probably pursue a dream or perhaps change career or do something completely "out there" :-) I just need a lazy Sunday like today to do that....
Saturday, March 17, 2012
OK Enough Already
Managed to get into the swing on cheat day (or should that be reward day). Finally got stuck into and had some bread and some crumptes, cheese especially my Stilton and some cheese biscuits before heading off to town to have an Italian meal - some Seafood Ravioli and Tiramisu (sp) and a few Peroni beers so hopefully I've done what is needed I certainly fell full up and slightly uncomfortable. Hopefully this has spiked my carbs and will help next weeks low carbs do their job.
So off to bed now and back to the diet tomorrow - glad to see that a large bag of Spinach has turned up in the fridge - I love the stuff and it goes well with all meals.
So off to bed now and back to the diet tomorrow - glad to see that a large bag of Spinach has turned up in the fridge - I love the stuff and it goes well with all meals.
Cheat Day has arrived
I feel like a bit of a Devil and want to go all out to cheat and have things I normally wouldn't anyway but the tale of the scale is holding me back a little. How about it looks as if I've lost between 6 and 8 pounds! In one week. It is one of those uncertainty things as I forgot when I weighed myself and whether it was before or after food. At the moment I'm loaded with a high protein breakfast and a quart of water so I'm bound to be a little heavier on the scales but they were hovering close to 16 and a half Stones! Which is pretty good. Mrs. F. commented this morning that I was visibly slimmer and she could see that most of my balcony of a stomach has melted away. I'm very pleased as the diet isn't as "bad" as I thought it might be and by that I mean bland and boring. I've managed to pull meals together and just use my imagination - sometimes they combine well and other times it's just like eating a mess of stuff :-)
So the quandary has arrived, I can go and cheat and eat what I like and all I have ready is some Flax Seed Oil and Cottage Cheese which I can make up with some dried fruits that I like and some yoghurt and I have a nice slice of Stilton sitting in the Fridge with my name on it. Other than that, I'm struggling to find what else to cheat with but tonight I can have what I like as we are out for a meal so perhaps that will make me feel less guilty about "undoing" the work - in real terms, as far as I can see, I'm not actually undoing the work I've done but it feels like it.
Now I've got to keep clear of the radio and TV and the Internet so that I can watch the highlights of F1 qualifying on the TV later.
So - great results on the weight loss front and long may that continue, I imagine, like many other diets, the first week's losses are quite large and things will settle down over the weeks ahead. Anyway, other things I've noticed - which may sound strange - are that I can get my clothes on better and that may seem strange to say but I was struggling to do that and was feeling "fat" hence going on the diet made a lot of sense as does the other health benefits of getting back to a normal weight, eating healthily and so on.
Right - off now to wreak mayhem on the household's food supplies - watch out fattening, sugary foods "Here's Johnny!!!" :-)
So the quandary has arrived, I can go and cheat and eat what I like and all I have ready is some Flax Seed Oil and Cottage Cheese which I can make up with some dried fruits that I like and some yoghurt and I have a nice slice of Stilton sitting in the Fridge with my name on it. Other than that, I'm struggling to find what else to cheat with but tonight I can have what I like as we are out for a meal so perhaps that will make me feel less guilty about "undoing" the work - in real terms, as far as I can see, I'm not actually undoing the work I've done but it feels like it.
Now I've got to keep clear of the radio and TV and the Internet so that I can watch the highlights of F1 qualifying on the TV later.
So - great results on the weight loss front and long may that continue, I imagine, like many other diets, the first week's losses are quite large and things will settle down over the weeks ahead. Anyway, other things I've noticed - which may sound strange - are that I can get my clothes on better and that may seem strange to say but I was struggling to do that and was feeling "fat" hence going on the diet made a lot of sense as does the other health benefits of getting back to a normal weight, eating healthily and so on.
Right - off now to wreak mayhem on the household's food supplies - watch out fattening, sugary foods "Here's Johnny!!!" :-)
Thursday, March 15, 2012
A little red wine in celebration
I thought I'd open up a bottle of wine I won a few years ago in 2010 to celebrate Steve's all clear today. Unfortunately it tasted absolutely awful and I had to pour it away it will probably do a nice job of cleaning out the drain. I hope Mrs. F. doesn't think I've necked the whole bottle. Instead I've pulled out an Italian Veneto and that is rather nice, so now I can properly raise my glass to Steve's continued well being and that means he can take the whole summer off until September when he has another scope followed by 3 BCGs.
I must ring up and arrange my CT Scan and I need to get to see my GP to get my Blood Pressure taken again as it was up at stratospheric levels last time I was there. I might just delay that a little while whilst I bring my body under control with this diet and the exercises I'm gradually bringing in. I've been pretty good and only done short 5 and 10 minute bursts. Just a few minutes on the vibration plate to do some squats and bends and then some wall pushes and also I do some 45% push ups using the bed rail to push against.
So far, so good. I had a cheeky look at the scales earlier and I'm a good 3 or 4 pounds lighter than I was on Sunday so that's not bad but I'll probably properly check tomorrow sometime. I'm now set fair with plenty of legumes and Mrs. F. also bought me some Fish and Red Kidney Beans for tomorrow so I'm happy about that. I've been unable to touch my soups because they contain things like rice or milk products and all sorts of things I'm not allowed. I can only have them on Saturday, my cheat day. I've lined up some nice Stilton Cheese for Saturday and I need to top up on my Flax Seed Oil and Cottage Cheese mixture too as I've missed that. I generally had that every day but will now limit myself to just twice a week meaning I've got a smaller amount of Cottage Cheese than the big tub I normally get through. Mind you, that's OK as is Flax Seed Oil, it is just the dried fruit and other stuff I used to have in it, including my Pro-biotic yoghurt that have had to be dropped. It's all for a good cause and I'm hoping that I can get into real shape over the next month or two especially as I can build my exercises and the nights get lighter and perhaps I can get out of the house a bit more.
We are getting into the "end game" with the business and are now pursuing different funding avenues, it is where we thought we would end up and so we've spent a couple of hours on conference calls tonight to set strategy going forward. I'm seriously reviewing what alternatives I may have should we fail as it is an ideal time to start thinking seriously about that. It makes no sense for one day to find that the dream is ended and I've no Plans B, C & D to fall back on.
I've started by setting down my requirements for the future and looking at things differently. I can now that health is a lot better and I can consider other options that may be more active and more assertive than the work at the Charity I did. I'm not saying that the work wasn't active and assertive but it fitted my illness at the time and work and illness worked around each other quite well. I think that travelling up to London and back each day would require a substantial incentive for me as would getting involved in anything as serious as I used to do unless I'm doing it for myself of course. I still have the family history business in stasis I suppose and the Program Management business is also still active so either of those are possibilities.
The holiday put me in a calm and peaceful place. I wasn't there before I went, I was quite annoyed that no one got what we are doing, that the EU investment market is dead, that no matter what people might say about encouraging entrepreneurs, it is just lip service and most of the stuff that is spouted by politicians and industry heads is a pack of lies. That's the disappointment with the whole thing. In the US it is very different but what we are doing is very European to start with - how could it be anything other than that? The US guys have plenty of people beating a path to their door so they don't need to come over here and see us and they don't tend to invest in services businesses.
So that was the annoyance and now I've gone past that because, it will be what it will be. We will have worked it out of our system and whilst it will be a huge shame and disappointment, it won't be the only radical idea that never made it, there must be thousands of broken dreams crushed every week through the same reasons. It isn't that they don't have merit or that they don't work it is just that their time isn't now and may never be. That's just the way the cookie crumbles I'm afraid. There's no need to get angry although perhaps you should and there's not a lot you can do about it so like the US Cops you just have to say "Nothing to see here, move along, get behind the line" :-)
Anyway, I haven't drunk my wine which I will do now, thinking of Steve and his great news and remembering that we are both clear, have both had some pretty traumatic times, some good and bad experiences and have worked our way from those very scary days away and up and beyond, taken control of our health and taken responsibility for recovering and maintaining our bodies as best we can.
Cheers!
I must ring up and arrange my CT Scan and I need to get to see my GP to get my Blood Pressure taken again as it was up at stratospheric levels last time I was there. I might just delay that a little while whilst I bring my body under control with this diet and the exercises I'm gradually bringing in. I've been pretty good and only done short 5 and 10 minute bursts. Just a few minutes on the vibration plate to do some squats and bends and then some wall pushes and also I do some 45% push ups using the bed rail to push against.
So far, so good. I had a cheeky look at the scales earlier and I'm a good 3 or 4 pounds lighter than I was on Sunday so that's not bad but I'll probably properly check tomorrow sometime. I'm now set fair with plenty of legumes and Mrs. F. also bought me some Fish and Red Kidney Beans for tomorrow so I'm happy about that. I've been unable to touch my soups because they contain things like rice or milk products and all sorts of things I'm not allowed. I can only have them on Saturday, my cheat day. I've lined up some nice Stilton Cheese for Saturday and I need to top up on my Flax Seed Oil and Cottage Cheese mixture too as I've missed that. I generally had that every day but will now limit myself to just twice a week meaning I've got a smaller amount of Cottage Cheese than the big tub I normally get through. Mind you, that's OK as is Flax Seed Oil, it is just the dried fruit and other stuff I used to have in it, including my Pro-biotic yoghurt that have had to be dropped. It's all for a good cause and I'm hoping that I can get into real shape over the next month or two especially as I can build my exercises and the nights get lighter and perhaps I can get out of the house a bit more.
We are getting into the "end game" with the business and are now pursuing different funding avenues, it is where we thought we would end up and so we've spent a couple of hours on conference calls tonight to set strategy going forward. I'm seriously reviewing what alternatives I may have should we fail as it is an ideal time to start thinking seriously about that. It makes no sense for one day to find that the dream is ended and I've no Plans B, C & D to fall back on.
I've started by setting down my requirements for the future and looking at things differently. I can now that health is a lot better and I can consider other options that may be more active and more assertive than the work at the Charity I did. I'm not saying that the work wasn't active and assertive but it fitted my illness at the time and work and illness worked around each other quite well. I think that travelling up to London and back each day would require a substantial incentive for me as would getting involved in anything as serious as I used to do unless I'm doing it for myself of course. I still have the family history business in stasis I suppose and the Program Management business is also still active so either of those are possibilities.
The holiday put me in a calm and peaceful place. I wasn't there before I went, I was quite annoyed that no one got what we are doing, that the EU investment market is dead, that no matter what people might say about encouraging entrepreneurs, it is just lip service and most of the stuff that is spouted by politicians and industry heads is a pack of lies. That's the disappointment with the whole thing. In the US it is very different but what we are doing is very European to start with - how could it be anything other than that? The US guys have plenty of people beating a path to their door so they don't need to come over here and see us and they don't tend to invest in services businesses.
So that was the annoyance and now I've gone past that because, it will be what it will be. We will have worked it out of our system and whilst it will be a huge shame and disappointment, it won't be the only radical idea that never made it, there must be thousands of broken dreams crushed every week through the same reasons. It isn't that they don't have merit or that they don't work it is just that their time isn't now and may never be. That's just the way the cookie crumbles I'm afraid. There's no need to get angry although perhaps you should and there's not a lot you can do about it so like the US Cops you just have to say "Nothing to see here, move along, get behind the line" :-)
Anyway, I haven't drunk my wine which I will do now, thinking of Steve and his great news and remembering that we are both clear, have both had some pretty traumatic times, some good and bad experiences and have worked our way from those very scary days away and up and beyond, taken control of our health and taken responsibility for recovering and maintaining our bodies as best we can.
Cheers!
Almost done
Blimey a marathon effort soaking, washing, boiling, simmering, rinsing, cooling and packaging my legumes :-) It has taken the best part of the day doing it - not standing over them but timings and cooling down, packaging and freezing etc. Almost done now and some left out for my meal tonight.
Just juiced up some carrots with some brussel sprout top - uggghhhh I'd forgotten how awful it tastes. As luck would have it I have some Limes and Lemons so a hit of lemon seems to have dampened it down and on my 6th pint of cold water too. I'm having coffee around about lunch time, normally an Americano but today did some filter so I could have a couple of cups. I've cut out sweeteners altogether and milk and all dairy so quite a change for me but not unpleasant and I've been able to cook up some interesting meals and using various herbs and combinations it hasn't been too bad. It's only Thursday and I have another day to go before going off and trying some other stuff. So far, so good, I've not weighed myself but I actually feel better and I actually feel thinner certainly my trousers are coming undone because they are too large and my belt size has gone in a notch although I attribute much of that to the holiday and all the exercise I got walking around Venice. Florence and Rome.
We are going out on Saturday night the girls are taking Mrs. F. out for Mothers Day which is on Sunday. They cleverly have vouchers for the evening and I suggested that I'll foot the bar bill as I may have a few extra beers and will certainly have a blow out meal!
Just juiced up some carrots with some brussel sprout top - uggghhhh I'd forgotten how awful it tastes. As luck would have it I have some Limes and Lemons so a hit of lemon seems to have dampened it down and on my 6th pint of cold water too. I'm having coffee around about lunch time, normally an Americano but today did some filter so I could have a couple of cups. I've cut out sweeteners altogether and milk and all dairy so quite a change for me but not unpleasant and I've been able to cook up some interesting meals and using various herbs and combinations it hasn't been too bad. It's only Thursday and I have another day to go before going off and trying some other stuff. So far, so good, I've not weighed myself but I actually feel better and I actually feel thinner certainly my trousers are coming undone because they are too large and my belt size has gone in a notch although I attribute much of that to the holiday and all the exercise I got walking around Venice. Florence and Rome.
We are going out on Saturday night the girls are taking Mrs. F. out for Mothers Day which is on Sunday. They cleverly have vouchers for the evening and I suggested that I'll foot the bar bill as I may have a few extra beers and will certainly have a blow out meal!
Kitchen Prep
The kitchen looks like one in a Restaurant as I prepare Lentils, Split Peas, Black Eyed Beans and Chick Peas. I'm doing them in a batch so that I can freeze them and that will allow me to ensure I have enough for the next week or so. More supplies are arriving tonight I hope in the form of Red Kidney Beans which do make economical sense to buy in tins. Will have to keep my eye out for others that are available.
For some reason Chick Peas are only to be used in moderation so I'll just limit those - it is the same as Avocado which I also like shouldn't be a daily thing - perhaps every couple of days or so.
Thought for Steve Kelley who is being checked later today with a flexible cystoscope. Fingers crossed, prayers sent for a clear verdict on his Judgement Day.
For some reason Chick Peas are only to be used in moderation so I'll just limit those - it is the same as Avocado which I also like shouldn't be a daily thing - perhaps every couple of days or so.
Thought for Steve Kelley who is being checked later today with a flexible cystoscope. Fingers crossed, prayers sent for a clear verdict on his Judgement Day.
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Short on carbs
Could tell that today I was short on the carbs as I felt hungry and you really shouldn't feel like that. So have set out to sort out my Black Eye Beans, Lentils and Split Peas and I have some Chick Peas that Mrs. F. bought but they must be had in moderation only so I'll prepare them but use sparingly. I can then freeze all of these and use them as I have this week for three meals a day - I need to somehow work out how I can make it 4 meals a day.
I have managed pretty well and apart from the red wine slip up, everything else seems to be working out OK. I feel quite cold which is unusual, I probably need to wear something a bit warmer but I'm drinking ice cold water and lots of it during the day.
Another 2 days to go until the cheat day which I have planned for one of my big no nos normally and that is Stilton Cheese. I froze quite a bit that I got for Christmas and so I can get that out of the freezer on Friday night and have that on Saturday.
The Formula 1 season starts on Saturday with the Australian Grand Prix. It is no longer free to view and so I'll have to make do with the highlights. I don't see that paying over £300 a year is quite right just to watch a couple of races (and that is all). I suppose we are lucky to get highlights. I imagine that this will start to erode the sport in this country as it did when they took over boxing.
On a brighter note, I've ordered my new mobile phone and package and hope that it will be a good step forward. I've got a slightly different package of time and data which I hope will actually mean me using it properly. I've had to seriously curtail using the one I have now as I ran up a £12 bill just for downloading a few emails. Hopefully that will now go away. Looking forward to getting a larger phone as well as the small screen on mine makes it difficult to read sometimes.
I have managed pretty well and apart from the red wine slip up, everything else seems to be working out OK. I feel quite cold which is unusual, I probably need to wear something a bit warmer but I'm drinking ice cold water and lots of it during the day.
Another 2 days to go until the cheat day which I have planned for one of my big no nos normally and that is Stilton Cheese. I froze quite a bit that I got for Christmas and so I can get that out of the freezer on Friday night and have that on Saturday.
The Formula 1 season starts on Saturday with the Australian Grand Prix. It is no longer free to view and so I'll have to make do with the highlights. I don't see that paying over £300 a year is quite right just to watch a couple of races (and that is all). I suppose we are lucky to get highlights. I imagine that this will start to erode the sport in this country as it did when they took over boxing.
On a brighter note, I've ordered my new mobile phone and package and hope that it will be a good step forward. I've got a slightly different package of time and data which I hope will actually mean me using it properly. I've had to seriously curtail using the one I have now as I ran up a £12 bill just for downloading a few emails. Hopefully that will now go away. Looking forward to getting a larger phone as well as the small screen on mine makes it difficult to read sometimes.
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Almost passed the test
But just a couple of glasses of red wine too many in my calculations. Oh well - these things are sent to try us - if it had been beer would it have been worse? Difficult to say I suppose.
So I'm sat here and should now call it a night and go to bed. A few months ago I'd be up until 1 or 2 am but will call it a day soon and head on up to get a good nights rest.
I've managed to keep on diet except those two extra glasses of wine! Let's see what I can do to keep to plan until Saturday when I can cheat myself stupid.
I have to say that I managed to keep pretty much to plan until a friend turned up late and kept me at the pub until closing time - I was expecting to get home a few hours before this...
Have until Saturday with no other engagements to resolve this I suppose!
So I'm sat here and should now call it a night and go to bed. A few months ago I'd be up until 1 or 2 am but will call it a day soon and head on up to get a good nights rest.
I've managed to keep on diet except those two extra glasses of wine! Let's see what I can do to keep to plan until Saturday when I can cheat myself stupid.
I have to say that I managed to keep pretty much to plan until a friend turned up late and kept me at the pub until closing time - I was expecting to get home a few hours before this...
Have until Saturday with no other engagements to resolve this I suppose!
So far so good
Trying to work out if I'm this cold because of the diet :-) I am absolutely frozen so much so that I put the central heating on early this afternoon. Mind you I have been drinking ice cold water and a good few pints of that too. Had my high protein breakfast and lunch both with beans for carbs. Had one cup of coffee today so far but feel the need for a cup of soup in a minute just to warm up!
Will have chicken tonight with some beans and vegetables. Off out to the pub so I will contain myself with Red Wine rather than Beer so as to keep on plan. Saturday is my day off and so I will enjoy a bit of a cheat then. I like the idea of having stuff that you wouldn't normally have anyway like chocolate and doughnuts etc. Not sure I'll go absolutely wild but I may cut loose with some pastries :-)
So far then so good, getting used to it and not feeling hungry at the moment but feeling cold and not surprised drinking this chilled water all day. Did also do a carrot juice this morning but added a touch too much Lime which made it a bit difficult to drink :-) I will keep juicing just to ensure that I get my concentrated fix of vegetables into my system. I won't be doing too much in the way of getting off plan though as I just need this to keep me topped up with the good stuff.
I have to say that I'm feeling good and got a good night's sleep and was up and about early too. It feels like a long day because of that and also getting breakfast eaten within the hour of waking means that I get going much quicker. I will go and give myself a short work out after writing this - no more than 5 or 10 minutes just to start to get into the habit.
I think after the holiday I am in a much better place mentally especially as I think that I've started to think the unthinkable that we may not get funded with our project. That was always a possibility and so I can calmly look forward to see what may come afterwards and take my time to do that. We aren't near the last throw of the dice but we have completed a number of phases and are getting past half way without much take up. From the meeting we had yesterday, it appears that our experience isn't un-typical in today's climate. We do however have a few trump cards left to play and that will be the test a little later.
Well that's about it at the moment, I feel slimmer from the holiday and fitting into my suit trousers was a bonus yesterday, I just hope that I can keep this momentum up and start to get back into my old clothes and fit more comfortably into my present ones!
Will have chicken tonight with some beans and vegetables. Off out to the pub so I will contain myself with Red Wine rather than Beer so as to keep on plan. Saturday is my day off and so I will enjoy a bit of a cheat then. I like the idea of having stuff that you wouldn't normally have anyway like chocolate and doughnuts etc. Not sure I'll go absolutely wild but I may cut loose with some pastries :-)
So far then so good, getting used to it and not feeling hungry at the moment but feeling cold and not surprised drinking this chilled water all day. Did also do a carrot juice this morning but added a touch too much Lime which made it a bit difficult to drink :-) I will keep juicing just to ensure that I get my concentrated fix of vegetables into my system. I won't be doing too much in the way of getting off plan though as I just need this to keep me topped up with the good stuff.
I have to say that I'm feeling good and got a good night's sleep and was up and about early too. It feels like a long day because of that and also getting breakfast eaten within the hour of waking means that I get going much quicker. I will go and give myself a short work out after writing this - no more than 5 or 10 minutes just to start to get into the habit.
I think after the holiday I am in a much better place mentally especially as I think that I've started to think the unthinkable that we may not get funded with our project. That was always a possibility and so I can calmly look forward to see what may come afterwards and take my time to do that. We aren't near the last throw of the dice but we have completed a number of phases and are getting past half way without much take up. From the meeting we had yesterday, it appears that our experience isn't un-typical in today's climate. We do however have a few trump cards left to play and that will be the test a little later.
Well that's about it at the moment, I feel slimmer from the holiday and fitting into my suit trousers was a bonus yesterday, I just hope that I can keep this momentum up and start to get back into my old clothes and fit more comfortably into my present ones!
Monday, March 12, 2012
First Day
Well that wasn't too bad apart from we had a meeting in London and needed to grab food up there. As luck would have it there was a chicken salad with lashings of Spinach to be had and no heavy dressing so I was pleased with getting that and also managed to drink my Ice Cold water - around 5 pints so far today. Was a little concerned that I hadn't taken on enough carbs but made up for that with 2/3 of a tin of Berlotti Beans :-)
Found a number of bags of frozen beans in the Freezer so using them first. The next test comes tomorrow as it is lads night out. As luck would have it my friend is the only one turning up, he has to go early and so I will be able to have some red wine (allowed) and not have any beer (shame but I am going to stick to this diet). I did some basic exercises today on my Vibration Plate machine and got some stretches and squats done too. I need to up these but I've learnt from the past not to overdo these things especially on the vibration exercises which give you a real workout quicker than you think they do.
So - the first day has gone OK and I'm hoping that I'll be ready for another crack at this in the morning bashing in huge protein hit to start with, drinking a litre of very cold water and this time I will be able to get some beans (legumes) in with my breakfast.
I was most surprised that my starting weight is 17 stone - OK that may seem large to you but for me I only look fat with a bit of a beer belly with this. I'm down from 18 stone and I think I may have been higher than that. In the past two weeks, before this diet, I've lost around 1 stone, an inch off my neck and perhaps an inch or two of my waist (I could actually get into my suit trousers without discomfort today). My watch strap too has shrunk by a notch and my clothes do feel looser on me. A good run at this diet will, I hope, allow me to lose another stone or more and start to get myself back to a decent weight allowing me to also get my BP down at the same time.
Found a number of bags of frozen beans in the Freezer so using them first. The next test comes tomorrow as it is lads night out. As luck would have it my friend is the only one turning up, he has to go early and so I will be able to have some red wine (allowed) and not have any beer (shame but I am going to stick to this diet). I did some basic exercises today on my Vibration Plate machine and got some stretches and squats done too. I need to up these but I've learnt from the past not to overdo these things especially on the vibration exercises which give you a real workout quicker than you think they do.
So - the first day has gone OK and I'm hoping that I'll be ready for another crack at this in the morning bashing in huge protein hit to start with, drinking a litre of very cold water and this time I will be able to get some beans (legumes) in with my breakfast.
I was most surprised that my starting weight is 17 stone - OK that may seem large to you but for me I only look fat with a bit of a beer belly with this. I'm down from 18 stone and I think I may have been higher than that. In the past two weeks, before this diet, I've lost around 1 stone, an inch off my neck and perhaps an inch or two of my waist (I could actually get into my suit trousers without discomfort today). My watch strap too has shrunk by a notch and my clothes do feel looser on me. A good run at this diet will, I hope, allow me to lose another stone or more and start to get myself back to a decent weight allowing me to also get my BP down at the same time.
New Regime
I was pretty impressed that on returning from holiday that I have managed to drop a belt size and even my watch needed to go in a notch. That's what a lot of walking can do for you and also eating sensibly.
Talking of eating sensibly, I am today starting the diet that fellow blogger Steve Kelley has had such success with. See here for Steve's experiences. Some time ago Steve and I tried a cross Atlantic weight loss "competition" and whilst we both lost a bit we had to work really hard at it and like may other diets I managed to put back everything I lost and more :-(
Steve has had impressive results so far and as far as I can see the whole thing is sustainable and makes a lot of sense. I'd suggest you don't do this if you are actually being treated or have cancer at the moment or to at least seek medical advice.
So I've prepared for this by getting rid of anything likely to deter me from the path of eating just a few things regularly for 6 days a week and then having a 7th cheat day. In essence I started this yesterday and stepped off this morning with a protein rich breakfast and some ice cold water to get things moving :-) Unfortunately I'm out to lunch today (typical) but I know what I can ask for or look for in terms of food and so will make sure that I do that.
The biggest problem with this diet is where to get your carbs from and so Legumes are the way to go on this. I've loaded the house up with Lentils and Black Eyed Beans etc. Now I need to prepare them and get them ready for using as it is these that need to be used to provide the carb part of the diet. If you don't get them you run a real risk of running out of energy, feeling hungry etc.
Rather than rattle through what Steve has eloquently described again here all I'll say is that I am looking forward to the change and trying this out and giving it a good go, it appears to be good in terms of results and in terms of allowing me to add in exercise without having to do 45 minutes a day which I was easily doing when I was dieting last year. It is strange that I am getting back into clothes that were too small 4 or 5 months ago and so there is further incentive for me to continue to bring my weight down.
Here goes - let's see what happens.
Talking of eating sensibly, I am today starting the diet that fellow blogger Steve Kelley has had such success with. See here for Steve's experiences. Some time ago Steve and I tried a cross Atlantic weight loss "competition" and whilst we both lost a bit we had to work really hard at it and like may other diets I managed to put back everything I lost and more :-(
Steve has had impressive results so far and as far as I can see the whole thing is sustainable and makes a lot of sense. I'd suggest you don't do this if you are actually being treated or have cancer at the moment or to at least seek medical advice.
So I've prepared for this by getting rid of anything likely to deter me from the path of eating just a few things regularly for 6 days a week and then having a 7th cheat day. In essence I started this yesterday and stepped off this morning with a protein rich breakfast and some ice cold water to get things moving :-) Unfortunately I'm out to lunch today (typical) but I know what I can ask for or look for in terms of food and so will make sure that I do that.
The biggest problem with this diet is where to get your carbs from and so Legumes are the way to go on this. I've loaded the house up with Lentils and Black Eyed Beans etc. Now I need to prepare them and get them ready for using as it is these that need to be used to provide the carb part of the diet. If you don't get them you run a real risk of running out of energy, feeling hungry etc.
Rather than rattle through what Steve has eloquently described again here all I'll say is that I am looking forward to the change and trying this out and giving it a good go, it appears to be good in terms of results and in terms of allowing me to add in exercise without having to do 45 minutes a day which I was easily doing when I was dieting last year. It is strange that I am getting back into clothes that were too small 4 or 5 months ago and so there is further incentive for me to continue to bring my weight down.
Here goes - let's see what happens.
Saturday, March 10, 2012
Alcohol Added Rant
It's nice once in a while, when having drunk a few beers, to attack one's blog with some sort of "under the influence" awakening.
Of course, it isn't the same as a "trip" and so can't mean anything either.
I realised tonight that I didn't spend the time I should doing the right thing for my family. As I spoke to friends who now have young families I waxed lyrical about spending time with them. I didn't but then, at this present time, the girls have a house that is paid for, the ability to fall back on money that we have put aside for them or that they have, to keep them at Uni, looking for a job, a flat etc. My "guilt" is that I maybe should have spent time with them then rather than them having the opportunity now. In other words, if I was having the opportunity to build the family foundations at the time they were born was it time well spent or not?
I don't know really? At this present time, no one needs to find finance, it is sitting in the bank(s) ready to be used. If I hadn't worked all over Europe for all those hours and grabbing those bonuses then perhaps I'd have seen the kids more when they were younger and yet if I hadn't have done that I'd have been out of a job there would have been no money and so on - we can go on that loop forever.
I don't know the answer but would you have sacrificed the now for the future or sacrificed the future for the now? There is no easy answer to that - I just need to focus on the now - I actually think I missed out huge tracks of my daughter's lives through working really hard when they were young. I think that just as you hit your peak in terms of career and climbing the greasy pole that everything arrives all at once. There's a trade off that you make and mine was to secure my family's future and yet I think now that I'd have rather secured the opportunity to watch them grow up a bit more. My children mean so much to me and now I regret that I secured their now rather than their then.
Of course, it isn't the same as a "trip" and so can't mean anything either.
I realised tonight that I didn't spend the time I should doing the right thing for my family. As I spoke to friends who now have young families I waxed lyrical about spending time with them. I didn't but then, at this present time, the girls have a house that is paid for, the ability to fall back on money that we have put aside for them or that they have, to keep them at Uni, looking for a job, a flat etc. My "guilt" is that I maybe should have spent time with them then rather than them having the opportunity now. In other words, if I was having the opportunity to build the family foundations at the time they were born was it time well spent or not?
I don't know really? At this present time, no one needs to find finance, it is sitting in the bank(s) ready to be used. If I hadn't worked all over Europe for all those hours and grabbing those bonuses then perhaps I'd have seen the kids more when they were younger and yet if I hadn't have done that I'd have been out of a job there would have been no money and so on - we can go on that loop forever.
I don't know the answer but would you have sacrificed the now for the future or sacrificed the future for the now? There is no easy answer to that - I just need to focus on the now - I actually think I missed out huge tracks of my daughter's lives through working really hard when they were young. I think that just as you hit your peak in terms of career and climbing the greasy pole that everything arrives all at once. There's a trade off that you make and mine was to secure my family's future and yet I think now that I'd have rather secured the opportunity to watch them grow up a bit more. My children mean so much to me and now I regret that I secured their now rather than their then.
Friday, March 09, 2012
Back to Reality
Well here I am again and feeling a bit trimmer which is good and just about to get back onto my diet and back to exercise routine. After a week and a half of walking quite long distances I'm feeling a lot better. My back was twinging and all over the place on the first few days in Venice but after a few days of working on it and also realising that I was carrying my back pack on one shoulder, I moved away from that and so far have managed to get better each day. The distances we walked must be in the 5 to 10 miles a day region I think and up and down steps and hills, over hard surfaces etc. All of the cities are best seen by foot in reality.
We were extremely lucky with the weather - on two days it was dodgy - one day in Florence was misty and damp but we changed schedule, went indoors and when we came out went on a long walk out of the city up into the hills and were rewarded with the sun coming out and burning off the mists and a wonderful series of views of the city. A long walk though but worth it. When we went to the Vatican it started drizzling (it had rained the night before and we had got in just before the heavens opened) and as we got inside from the obligatory queuing the heavens once again opened up. So all in all we got away with great weather. Some of the train journeys were amazing - Lucerne to Milan and Turin to Paris being the stand out ones. We would have liked to have seen a bit more of Basel to Lucerne but the light failed but of what we could see, this would have been spectacular too.
Nothing quite prepares you for Venice, Florence or Rome really. They are each different in character and each was enjoyable in its own right. We fitted as much in as we could in each of the cities and did most of the "tourist" stuff however, the best bits were getting out early, getting past the queues and finding those little hidden gems that only the intrepid explorer can hope to see. In Venice we stayed about as far from the tourist area as it is possible to stay. The upside was a few quiet canals and local life, hidden squares and churches. The downside? Few restaurants and few evening activities unless going back into the city. We felt sorry for the day tourists on the Cruise liners - quite how they could do Venice in a day was beyond us - we did 2 and a half days - we could have done a bit more on departure day but didn't!
The train journeys were good in general, the people were not so. First class travel made things a bit better but I do find aircraft and train travel to be a bit of a strain especially when the web site booking systems stick all the passengers together in one carriage of the train leaving the carriages either side virtually empty (late booking may help here). No sooner had one person struggled off with their case than someone else struggled on with theirs and tried to put an oversized suitcase into an undersized luggage rack, then try and back it out to the main luggage racks where the doors are. If they had been booked either side there would have been easier access and egress. Anyway, there's me being a pragmatist. We often let them all scramble on and off the trains and get on when all is settled - that was we can find seats, locate space etc.
I'm sure I could write a travel book based on the experiences of the journey. Would I travel by train again? Pretty sure I would but I'd probably go first class all the way despite the issue I had with the idiots on the Turin to Paris train, I know how to avoid that in future.
We were extremely lucky with the weather - on two days it was dodgy - one day in Florence was misty and damp but we changed schedule, went indoors and when we came out went on a long walk out of the city up into the hills and were rewarded with the sun coming out and burning off the mists and a wonderful series of views of the city. A long walk though but worth it. When we went to the Vatican it started drizzling (it had rained the night before and we had got in just before the heavens opened) and as we got inside from the obligatory queuing the heavens once again opened up. So all in all we got away with great weather. Some of the train journeys were amazing - Lucerne to Milan and Turin to Paris being the stand out ones. We would have liked to have seen a bit more of Basel to Lucerne but the light failed but of what we could see, this would have been spectacular too.
Nothing quite prepares you for Venice, Florence or Rome really. They are each different in character and each was enjoyable in its own right. We fitted as much in as we could in each of the cities and did most of the "tourist" stuff however, the best bits were getting out early, getting past the queues and finding those little hidden gems that only the intrepid explorer can hope to see. In Venice we stayed about as far from the tourist area as it is possible to stay. The upside was a few quiet canals and local life, hidden squares and churches. The downside? Few restaurants and few evening activities unless going back into the city. We felt sorry for the day tourists on the Cruise liners - quite how they could do Venice in a day was beyond us - we did 2 and a half days - we could have done a bit more on departure day but didn't!
The train journeys were good in general, the people were not so. First class travel made things a bit better but I do find aircraft and train travel to be a bit of a strain especially when the web site booking systems stick all the passengers together in one carriage of the train leaving the carriages either side virtually empty (late booking may help here). No sooner had one person struggled off with their case than someone else struggled on with theirs and tried to put an oversized suitcase into an undersized luggage rack, then try and back it out to the main luggage racks where the doors are. If they had been booked either side there would have been easier access and egress. Anyway, there's me being a pragmatist. We often let them all scramble on and off the trains and get on when all is settled - that was we can find seats, locate space etc.
I'm sure I could write a travel book based on the experiences of the journey. Would I travel by train again? Pretty sure I would but I'd probably go first class all the way despite the issue I had with the idiots on the Turin to Paris train, I know how to avoid that in future.
Thursday, March 08, 2012
Italy - WOW
Back from a hectic week and a half in Italy. Had a wonderful time, mostly good weather and of course the culture and the food stick in the mind. Even lost a bit of weight and a belt size but that was through the massive amount of walking we did over the days. Today has been stunning making our way back from Torino to home. We went from sunlight to snow in the Alps and back to rain, grey and then blue skies all in one day.
Generally a good time but occasionally I find that people are just downright disgraceful and ignorant and rude but then that's the Italians and French for you. Removing our luggage from the racks, placing theirs in it and throwing our cases (and others) in a pile in the train corridor was just one of the tricks these monkeys got up to - and that on a first class compartment. Wish I'd seen them do it, there'd have been someone with bruised testicles as a starter...
Apart from that, the way that these guys allow their dogs to shit unabated even around ancient world heritage monuments and their apparent lack of oral or other bodily hygiene the places themselves made up for it. Proof in both Italy and France that many many many many years ago there was an advanced, artistic and altogether more elegant time than those who inherited it deserve.
Generally a good time but occasionally I find that people are just downright disgraceful and ignorant and rude but then that's the Italians and French for you. Removing our luggage from the racks, placing theirs in it and throwing our cases (and others) in a pile in the train corridor was just one of the tricks these monkeys got up to - and that on a first class compartment. Wish I'd seen them do it, there'd have been someone with bruised testicles as a starter...
Apart from that, the way that these guys allow their dogs to shit unabated even around ancient world heritage monuments and their apparent lack of oral or other bodily hygiene the places themselves made up for it. Proof in both Italy and France that many many many many years ago there was an advanced, artistic and altogether more elegant time than those who inherited it deserve.
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Nice
Well that was nice - I was voted in "with acclaim" and in all my years I've never seen that at a meeting so that was very special indeed. A little embarrassing too as despite the way I portray myself I don't like to be too much in the limelight that way.
Anyway, off to bed now and off to Italy in the early morning - I will blog when I get back unless I can get to a PC before.
Anyway, off to bed now and off to Italy in the early morning - I will blog when I get back unless I can get to a PC before.
One Down
One to go. Today's Lodge meeting will be interesting as they will elect me as the Worshipful Master for the next year. I get installed in June and have one year at the helm. There are only a couple of duties to be done before the summer break but from September onwards it will be full on with various meetings etc.
I don't have to do much today other than look surprised and say thank you :-) The real work will come in June no doubt and when I get back from holiday writing to the various people that will make up my team for the next year.
Not too much drinking today as I need to get home and finish packing!
I don't have to do much today other than look surprised and say thank you :-) The real work will come in June no doubt and when I get back from holiday writing to the various people that will make up my team for the next year.
Not too much drinking today as I need to get home and finish packing!
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