Medium Depressed

I'm in a sort of no mans land at the moment. I haven't quite fully recovered from this illness, the hospitalisation (I swear I still feel tender in and around my bladder area) and the sluggishness that being stuck inside brings.

It isn't massively depressing and it isn't upsetting as such. It is draining and dragging. I've rapidly moved on from having stopped my University course and had some good comments back on part of my last assignment but also (and I must have been ill) I missed a part of the second question out - which is so unlike me. It was good that I left that and walked away when I did. It was weighing down on me.

Health really is my biggest concern at the moment. Just getting back to being fit again would be good and I need to plan out quite how I want to do that. Like many I hate exercise - it is repetitive and boring and just feels utterly pointless. I'd far rather do long walks and be doing something to get fit but you cannot structure those too easily where I can with my cross trainer. It is far easier to get in the habit of not doing exercise than doing it. I learnt that I shouldn't be doing exercises first thing in the morning and that ideally I should have some food inside me and so this really means I need to consider doing exercises in the evening when - of course - I get in from work after 12 hours out of the house. You can see the problem here. When I was exercising before I worked from home and was able to do 30 or 40 minutes a day every day. Well, if I am serious about getting fit then I need to schedule it and I need to ensure I do it. I remember to take my tablets, my pre and probiotics and my Vitamin C all the time now and so to stick in 30 or 40 minutes of exercise must be possible? To stick to it might not be. Of course then there is cooling down and having a shower as well so I need to put aside an hour at least and perhaps 3 to 4 times a week would be reasonable.

I used to do a lot of cycling but again, I haven't gotten around to that in a while and walking is OK but you really need to do a good distance and the light and weather are against me. It is nice for walks here but country walks in the fields and lanes where there is little light at all at this time of year.

Diet also needs to be looked at a bit more seriously too as I tend to eat well at home but with meetings out I do tend to have quite a bit of food like three or four course lunches, wine and beer, port and a cheese board - a bit like this week coming! A big meal tomorrow and another on Saturday.

I'm certain that I'll need to get onto the heath kick again if I am to drop my blood pressure and lose some weight but more importantly just to get my fitness levels up.