Failing to meet my expectations

Not me - this is other people. You come out of treatment changed and you expect a lot more of people, you've changed, why haven't they? You set high expectations, perhaps too high and the trouble is they will always fail to meet your ideals.

I can't tell you why I expect more from those around me but I do. I expect people to understand the problems I have been through, the pain, the trauma and to treat me differently. I'm guessing that this is where the problem lies. I've spent ages dumbing down and making light of what I have, now I am expecting most people to realise that actually it was serious and I'm not getting the balance right at all. I always say I'm fine, I'm OK and I am now, I wasn't earlier on - only now do I realise just how much I've been through these past 5 months - the mind must just blank it out.

The real issue is that I am finding it hard to realise that actually I am the only person who has changed and all those around me are the same as before - why should they have changed, there was nothing life changing in their lives. For me, things will never be the same again and so outlook, expectations and time all matter differently to me than to anyone who knew me before. I have a view that I might not be here too long and so you (or I) ought to do something now rather than put it off. I want to fit in more and yet no one else does. I can imagine this is going to lead to some interesting situations as things progress as typically I wouldn't kick up a stink about this and I haven't so far but sooner or later I'm bound to pose the question.

I notice that I really do give stick to suppliers and others when I'm dealing with them on the phone or in correspondence so I imagine it may be only a short time before everyone else gets the "benefit of my thinking".