Disturbed Night

It's bad when I go to bed thinking and so it proved - my head was it's usual computer like self and woke me every hour or so during a funny old night which didn't appear as humid as before but felt it anyway.

I'd already tried to switch off at around midnight when I stood outside and had a small glass of red wine.  It was then that I noticed strange pinpricks of light at my shed at the end of the garden.  I hadn't noticed these before and thought they might be animal's eyes in the darkness so I wander up the garden - there are no obstacles just grass and when I got there to my annoyance noticed that there were a series of lights on in the shed.  It is darkened and blackened out as a photographic darkroom for my daughter.  I would imagine the last time it was used was about a year ago (I may be wrong).  Which means I've been paying an electricity bill for lights and equipment all left switched on for about a year in my estimation.  

I didn't get angry - I don't do that - just left a curt message on the kitchen worktop.  I've now switched off the mains to the garage as a double precaution......  

Having had fitful sleep I've got up this morning and need to do some work on this computer for my friend and hopefully I can complete all of the major work today and when he returns just switch it over.   That should clear me to go make a start in the office if it has suitably cooled down - it's still pretty hot up there.

My head is still in a crazy place - said enough about it yesterday and the day before other than - I know I know the answer and I'm just not brave enough or fully committed to sorting it out so have only myself to blame for my own self pity :-)  When I build up the courage and fully understand the consequences of those actions then I need to act.  Until then I need to realise that the solution to this is in my own hands and that I need to work on that.  It's no use whining about it when I have known the answer all along and when I could sort it out but I don't because it is unpleasant, hurts people and so on.  Sometimes you have to just do it.